Pregnancy after third degree tear

[Mumofonexo]

Just after some advice please from those who have experienced a 3rd degree tear and gone on to have other children. I had a 3b tear nearly 6 months ago and I’ve now been told I have sphincter weakness. I’m really worried if I went on to have other children I could end up with bowel incontinence issues while pregnant?

tia x

@justmyluck1234
Amazing! You must of felt on top of the world compared to last time!
glad to hear all is well ☺️ I must admit my bladder isn’t as strong either but like yourself no accident in that department I think pregnancy and birth makes everyone’s bladder weaker

@Blaggingit123
You must of had really good repairs!

mine was repaired in theatre but things can be missed. I’m waiting on a scan to confirm if I was graded correctly 😞

Yes - I had issues with this. To give some more info my eldest is now 15 and I had suction and assisted delivery. I was repaired immediately after the birth and I have been told many times that I was very lucky as the repair was faultless and I look perfect down there. I was a youngish first time mum. I had issues with urge and wind initially. It did improve and after a period of time whet back to normal. I have had bio feedback and all other treatments including electrical stimulation devices but I personally never saw a huge difference with these. I think you need to be very strict but it is difficult to find time when the children are young.

1. I am happy to say that my life went back to a new normal - including my sex life.
2. issues around intercourse are making sure I do not need a poo as if I did I know the penis could force it out. I know this sounds terrible but it has never actually happened.
3. I go to toilet when I need to as I don’t want to risk waiting.
4. You can get prolapse etc and was told it was due to previous trauma to area.
5. c-section scar does not look nice.

I desperately wanted a subsequent virginal delivery but now as an older woman i am glad I did not. Things change and just like old sports injuries can start to niggle so can old birth injuries - including ones from natural deliveries. I do not believe a natural delivery is worth damaging your body for - I see no difference between my children’s health, mental/physical performance. I was told the morning after giving birth that I might be incontinant and when I cried they said ‘but the baby is healthy and that is the main thing’ I do not agree with this and do not believe I should have been damaged so badly when a very safe and effective c-section was available as an option. I had birth trauma and post traumatic stress due to that delivery- I suffered with extreme fear that my baby would die and thought I was dying. Women should not be put through this if there is an alternative available - we count to!

@Flyingkitten
It’s interesting to hear you didn’t see much improvement with those treatments I think that’s the next step for me if things don’t improve but like you said it’s finding the time. I think it will be something I will be doing at bedtime as that’s the only time I get to myself.

TMI but can you hold a poop if you need to? I’m worried about going back to work if I need to hold it longer than 10 minutes.

Does your c section scar bother you? And does your tear hurt now at all? My tear pulls if I sit or lie in a certain way

I totally agree with you! Mums health should be just as important as the baby’s but sadly we get neglected and the baby is seen as a priority. When I complained to the hospital I said exactly that. They say they do what is best for mother and baby but I don’t see how damaging our sphincter muscles and causing prolapses is best for the mother!

I would definitely never have a natural birth after this experience it’s not worth causing more issues.