Postpartum weightloss journey encouragement

[howdoyousurvive]

Just had my second baby, who is now nearly 5 weeks old, and with the christmas season, I've really struggled with being kind to my postpartum body. Have this huge fear that the weight is going to linger and I'm going to feel ugly for the next few years.
This is my second baby, gave birth to my son last March (2under2club) and I never fully got back to how I wanted to be. I reached my prepregnancy weight but my body just seemed/looked different.

How do you manage the shift of accepting that your body shape may look different now post kids?

Also, any tips on returning to exercise / good habits with young kids. I can definitely feel more tension on my stomach this time so I don't want to rush to exercise and injur myself but also eager to return!

Thank you for any help x

Following.

I'm waiting for DC2 to arrive any day now. DC1 was born April 2022 and I definitely want to return to "me" but not sure how to achieve that with 2u2.

Congratulations on your new addition

Thank you and good luck with yours!

I definitely have more of desperation to get back to myself after the second. Think being pregnant for practically 20 months has made me question what normal even feels like in my own body anymore.

Oh my gosh @howdoyousurvive I could have written your post word for word and date for date! It is such early days for us both! Can we try to encourage one another to be positive and gentle about our bodies, but also to make slow progress on returning to “ourselves”? I think a mix of hormonal, emotional and physical changes, and all in such quick succession, makes our feelings totally natural.

I am trying to go for short, gentle walks when I have the energy (baby in sling, toddler in pram) and will work up to longer walks when I am 12 weeks postpartum and have given my pelvic floor time to recover. My husband has to look after the toddler and/or baby on his days off so that I can walk, and he needs to do more housework than he’s used to so that I have the time to get out. I reach for sugary things a lot at the moment, I think just because I’m so sleep deprived and it helps me get through those moments (even though I know it doesn’t help with energy in the longer term).

Our bodies go through a lot, not just in pregnancy and childbirth, but also in the demands on our time, sleep and posture when we’re looking after two under two. I got very skinny after breastfeeding my first but that was because I was frequently ill when she started nursery, so I also lost a lot of strength and fitness. I felt like I might be getting close to feeling like myself again but then I was pregnant again. Pre-babies I was slim and fit, but I put on 50 pounds with my most recent pregnancy and my body now feels quite alien to me. I celebrate my body for growing and birthing my babies, but I also miss having more strength and energy and want to feel comfortable and “normal” in my own body again.

Congrats on your new addition!

I completely agree with everything about actually appreciating what our bodies have just been through and how amazing they actually are; they are far more than what the scales say or dress size. However, it's felt a bit harder this time round as it's just go, go, go.

The irony is, I'm complaining but I have given myself full freedom over the xmas period with chocolate, food and drink. I wanted to have a period of enjoyment before I begin being more restrictive with my diet. But again, I want to be realistic in a 80:20 approach and not get too caught up in it all as I don't want my maternity leave to have me consumed with my weight, as I'll regret not being present with this free time with my children.

I have felt much weaker this time round. The strain in my stomach when i move in certain ways so I really want to recover well and do the weightloss properly as I know that is the most sustainable way. It's just so hard when you want to get back to yourself asap!

Plan of action starting from next week: more walks - weather dependent of course/try and do simple walking workouts on rainy days - no full fat drinks and no wine (been able to enjoy a few glasses of red over xmas - not BF) and begin pelvic floor/stomach exercises at home to build up strength so hopefully by 12 week mark be able to go back to the gym twice a week.
This is all said whilst acknowledging I am taking care of 2 tiny humans and if they (and ultimately me) have a bad night, and I need a pick me up with some chocolate, that is ok.

There really is strength in solidarity and knowing that you're not alone in how you, so thank you for sharing!! Let's be kind to ourselves but also cheers to the journey of becoming bangin' mommas👏👌

@howdoyousurvive how has the past week been for you? I would love to know how you, or anyone else in a similar position, is getting on at the moment!

I also feel much weaker this time round than I did with my first. Like you, I want to feel actually strong again, so that I might be able to have a third child next year. I’m pushing 40 though so might think better of it in a year!

The weather has been awful and I’ve been totally shattered, but I’ve found a few things help:

1. No matter how tired I am, how chaotic the children or messy the house, I always always have eggs first thing in the morning. It sets me up for good eating the rest of the day which makes me feel good and helps me look after my family better.
2. Getting out for a walk - as soon as the weather clears for a few moments, toddler goes in the buggy and baby in the sling. Actually getting out the door is so hard but it feels so good to get fresh air and I think it helps my sleep and makes it easier to eat better food, funnily enough.
3. If I don’t have time to make myself a proper lunch then I have a big bowl of low fat Greek yoghurt, oats, peanut butter and honey. It’s high protein, good fats, tasty, and sustains me so that I don’t feel ravenous for sugary snacks all day. If I really desperately need an afternoon snack (before having an early family dinner) then I’ll have 1 banana or a few dates or prunes to keep me going.
4. Adequate sleep makes the above so much easier. My little one is sleeping well at the moment but that is bound to change. Must stay off mumsnet so I don’t stay up too late…
5. I haven’t had any chocolate, cake or biscuits which is totally unlike me! There isn’t anything wrong with them but after months of eating so much of it I have to say “no” to even the smallest thing to avoid falling into old habits. It’s amazing how little I miss any of it with each passing day, but will of course have some at dinner parties or on my birthday later this month.
6. No alcohol. That’s an easy one for me though as I live out in the sticks and my husband is frequently away for work so I need to always be sober to look after the children or to drive if anything goes wrong.
7. Drinking loooooads of water!! I take my water bottle everywhere with me and fill it countless times a day. Breastfeeding cravings were also just extreme thirst - I wasn’t drinking enough water before.

Doing the above helped me rapidly shed baby weight last time. I’m not weighing myself at the moment while I focus on building healthy habits and feeling good - or must be working because my enormous pants are already much more loose 😂 At the end of each day I feel good about myself for eating well and getting into the fresh air, and my energy levels and mood are a little better every day.

@TrudyProud How have you been getting on for the past week? 2 under 2 at Christmas is a LOT! Does your older one go to nursery/childminder? Makes it much easier but I know that’s a big luxury.

Hey!

Sounds like you're doing great for your first week! Go mama🥳

This past week has been a lot😅 one extreme to another as my partner went back to work and mentally I've been all over.

Tbh, very similar new good habits!

1. I fast each morning (i allow coffees - non-negotiable) until 12/1 and try to have eggs and 1 piece of toast with my son or wait until he naps. If I have to wait until he naps or I'm feeling extra lethargic, I'll have a protein bar.
2. Trying to get out for a walk with them both whenever I've had them both on my own. I had a few appointments last week so my MIL had them/my toddler. Defo helps but jesus, i have the babyjogger double and its great but man it's a workout getting that set up and just getting out the door!

3/5 - no snacking on crap throughout the day. Can have a banana or at the end of the day, to crave my sweettooth, I've been having an options hot chocolate and a chocolate snackajack. Hits the spot and means im still satisfying the need so I don't come crashing down with the desire to binge eat

1. Sleep. Started to take a "nap" before 10/11pm for an hour to make up for being up in the night. Baby seems to be waking up more but think it could be growth spurt but who knows - everythings a phase.

6 No alcohol - easy.

1. Water - I'm usually really good with this but occasionally when I feel like I've ran round like a headless chicken caring for the kifs and trying to keep the house running, I'l look at my bottle and realise I've barely drank so this is something I need to prioritise more.

Overall, I'm proud of how I'm getting on and I too have a genuine desire to not eat crap because I've done it for so long and want to actually prove that I can get on without it all.
Been a tough week mentally trying to find a new balance between managing the needs of both kids and the house. Can't stand the mess but I need to let go of it as it defo becoming unreasonable to maintain everything whilst baby is still so young and dependent. Also, my toddler's 2yr review is due in March and I've been stressing that he's still not talking and not pronouncing the words he does say correctly. His understanding is incredible and is definitely taking a lot in and I know he'll just do it in his own time but I think because he's not gone to nursery, until now potentially, then I'm worried he's missed out on the social aspect of learning from other children. Mum guilt is crazy at killing you off!! Looking at a nursey tomorrow for hopefully 1 day a week until he gets the 2 free days from the new working parents childcare offer. Hopefully, getting him started will give him what he needs and me what I need as well - a day to reset and prioritise chores but also nap with the baby!

Cannot wait to have days where I can go to the gym once my partner gets home to have a bit of solo me time that isnt simply a shower or cooking my hellofresh😅

Thanks for checking-in. Nice to offload to someone in the same position!

I'm shocked to say this but I'm STILL pregnant 🫣. This baby is firmly wedged in - giving her a few more days before she's forcibly evicted.

My eldest is 20 months and in nursery FT. She'll remain there through my maternity leave so she retains normalcy but also so I get 121 with my youngest.

I'm already making plans on how to get back to me once this little one arrives

@TrudyProud I’ll be keeping everything crossed for you! So exciting!

It’s great that your eldest will stay in nursery - good for him to have the routine and a place that’s all about him, and great for you to recover and bond. I have found that it is a really lovely age gap so far but a little full-on at times…

Definitely a great age gap! Crazy, challenging and chaotic at times, but so many positives already and I know there's more to come!

Had a rough day yesterday and took some time to , also included some goodies and a maccys. This is where I will be realistic on this journey as I can't be killing myself, especially still in the early weeks! Also, starting to look forward to slightly warmer weather as going out for a walk with a newborn and toddler in this cold makes me anxious they'll get ill no matter how much I wrap them up haha

Hope you're having a good week!