Episiotomy stitches broken down

[Lalalul]

Hi all,

I am 2 weeks post partum. Birth was episiotomy and forceps. Unfortunately my stitches got infected and have completely broken down.

I had a stitch review today with doctor and have been referred to gynaecologist. They say I will likely need reconstructive surgery in 2-3 months time. In the mean time it should heal, it just won’t heal together so will need reattaching.

i feel miserable. I am crying daily, struggling to sleep and when my baby cries I can just want to cry myself. I’m not enjoying the new born phase at all and feel like with my injury I can’t be a proper mum. It’s not too sore but I can’t sit on it for too long. I’m terrified of my husband finishing paternity in a few days and how I will cope. I have appointments when he is at work and not sure if I can drive or how to get to them.

has anyone had this before, how long was the recovery and when did things get better? I just want to enjoy my ‘newborn bubble’ and feel slightly human and I don’t. Thanks all

Oh gosh OP, you poor thing. I hope your consulting appointment will be helpful and reassuring. Have you tried bathing your tender parts with salty water?
You might find it helpful to buy a kids swimming ring to sit on.
I had a massive episiotomy which didn’t break down but took 12 months to heal. I was so glad of the swimming ring.

My late husband was v inconsiderate and wanted to resume our intimate life 4 weeks postpartum so stay strong if you are faced with that pressure. He made my life hell.

@Stratocumulus im so sorry, 12 months is a long time and to have such an inconsiderate husband too. That’s awful. I think I will invest in a proper ring cushion as I’ve made a makeshift one with my pregnancy pillow. When did you start to feel a bit more human? We’ve barely had visitors and have only left the house for appointments. When did you feel ok to drive? I just want to be able to do some ‘normal’ activities.

I had exactly the same thing, but my birth was during lockdown and no one wanted to see me - so I was just prescribed antibiotics over the phone.

I would advise:

• wee in the shower
• poo standing up
• take your time
• get a ring

I was able to drive at around 4 weeks, I air dried most days, tried to keep it as clean as possible. Barely walked for a few weeks I got antibiotics from the Drs. Have you had the antibiotics yet? It took 5 months to completely heal, walking would still be a bit painful, but normal life resumed around 6- 8 ish weeks (with the odd bit of pain, when walking or sitting). I didn’t have sex until around 5 months post birth.

Really sorry to hear you are going through this, I am having another baby by elective c section this time - you can push for this. I’m sure it’s the last thing on your mind, but know that next time that is an option.

I had an episiotomy that was ok, but birth left me totally incontinent without any bladder control at all. At the same point you are now, I was also crying multiple times a day - I couldn’t believe how mutilated I felt after birth and let down by the whole birth process. I felt like I couldn’t focus on my baby because I was so focussed on the horrific recovery I was going through. I also had an undiagnosed UTI from all the catheters which made it extremely painful to sit. I just felt like my body was in no way what I recognised. So while our situations are different I totally understand how you feel. You are in the midst of some pretty intense hormones too (plus the sleep deprivation!). I just wanted to let you know that it will get better. Ask for pain killers if you need (my GP was much more helpful than the gynae team). I’m 6 months post partum and I no longer feel shocked or that feeling of mutilation.

I hope you can be kind to yourself in this period. It’s ok and valid to feel what you are feeling. The pain and shock will lessen. Your baby loves you, and your relationship will deepen and grow so quickly. Your body is still in acute recovery from birth, and you won’t always feel like this. It will change so fast. Find yourself a good pelvic floor physiotherapist too - mine has changed my life. Good luck and congratulations on the safe delivery of your baby.

Hi. This happened to me. I am now three years on and all is fine. Back to how i was before birth. I was crying and upset for a long while but i went bach to work at 8 months pp and was ok. Not in any pain. I saw a gyne at 3 months pp and all had healed naturally. No surgery needed. Now its literally a line scar. Thats all. My tips- take it day by day, i slept with no bottoms after lochia to air the wound. Showered wound often to keep it infection free. Went to see GP for review every few weeks until she confirmed at 8 weeks pp that all had healed/closed up. Its difficult but it gets better and you get to the point where you dont ever think about it anymore. At the time it was all i thought about. PM me if you want xx

Ps. It will heal. With stitches it heals from the top down. Without it heals from the bottom up. The scar will be slightly wider than if it was stitched. It does heal. The gyne told me to remember that episiotomy is like second degree tear in terms of structures cut (skin and muscle). Some women choose to not have second degree tears stitched. The body does heal by itself. But will take longer than if the stitch had held xx

Same happened to me, stitches completely opened up, multiple infections, shocked looks by healthcare professionals when they saw it but after 12 weeks it had completely healed and I have had no issues since. At the time it was horrendous, felt like my insides were falling out and that heavy dragging achy feeling when walking round was horrible. Lavender oil in a bath was really good for me and make sure you are doing lots of pelvic floor exercises.

Late as in divorced?

How the hell could he expect intimacy through an open wound???

Oh love, I really feel for you. Those post partum weeks are so, so hard. It's only been two weeks, you will heal. It took me around 6 weeks to feel much better, and a few months to feel back to normal. That's a fairly common timeline.

When you're ready, after your surgery, perhaps think about self referring to a pelvic floor physio. It made the world of difference to me when I was still experiencing pain during intimacy 10 months after birth. She did some kind of pressure release massage that was seriously magic! After two sessions I feel 99% back to normal, no pain. I self referred via the NHS bladder, pelvic and bowel clinic.

Be kind to yourself and rest as much as you can. Lying down as much as you can is the best thing for recovery.

Really feel for you OP. Do you have any friends or family nearby who could help at all with getting to appointments etc? Could your partner get any additional time off to support you?
I had an episiotomy that took a while to heal and the following was really useful for me:

• if you’re breastfeeding try lying on your side in bed to do it to take weight off the area.
• my nurse friend advised letting the air to it as much as poss which means basically lying in bed naked (watch some Netflix??). This really helped mine.
• Bath in Epsom salts helped me. Might be worth googling if that’s fine with opened stitches. Maybe one for a few weeks down the line.
• If you do need to travel in the car try to raise the seat as much as possible. I found sitting in the reclined low down position of a car seat really aggravated my stitches.
• watching The Let Down on Netflix cheered me up when I was feeling similarly low in the post birth haze

I’m so sorry it’s affecting your enjoyment of this time. Try seeing it as an excuse to be just you and baby for a bit longer and just realllly take things easy and rest and allow yourself time to heal & recover. It will get better!

I ended up having 2 reconstructive surgeries and then cosmetic surgery after a double episiotomy that was stitched incorrectly by the Registrar but I have to say all three were not as bad and less painful than the episiotomy healing itself. Hang on in there and give the baby lots of cuddles.