Feel bad about breastfeeding

[Orangetree34]

Six week old Baby been combo fed since the start as had little milk in first few days after c section and milk production just doesn't seem to keep up with her appetite so always topped up to the point that it's now mostly formula.

I've been expressing with a machine since the start but the amount fluctuates - a good session might get 50ml, a bad one 20ml or just drops but baby needs over 100ml for a full feed now so my milk is like a snack.

I was feeling alright about it but just seen one too many smug social media posts about the joys of breastfeeding today and feel like a failure. I didn't want to give up on it yet but amount of milk is so small and seems to get less and less. Am I not pumping enough? I do it every couple of hours

A baby is far more efficient at removing milk from the breast than a pump. Some women just don't respond well to pumps at all.

The way to up your supply is to feed - if baby is wanting a lot it's not necessarily that you're not producing enough, it's baby trying to up the supply.

A small supply at the start is now al as baby's tummy is tiny.

Remember output equals input so as long as you get wet and dirty nappies you are generally speaking doing fine.

You’ve done amazingly to get as far as you have. Listen to the more or less about breastfeeding. It’s a more sensible approach to the difference breastfeeding makes. Please don’t feel bad for doing what you know is the best for your baby.

Do YOU want to breastfeed? That’s the main question. If you do, putting baby to breast as much as you can will help your milk supply, and is far better than pumping.

If you don’t, give bottles and any pumped milk you can.

And don’t for one second feel guilty. You are feeding your baby perfectly. It doesn’t matter where it comes from. It’s so clear you love her dearly from your worrying!

I was insane about breastfeeding when Dd was tiny, I can tell you now she’s 6 it hasn’t entered my thoughts for years. You’re doing ok, promise.

I do put her on my breast sometimes too with mixed success. Sometimes she latches and feeds, other times not so I give up and make a bottle as she's screaming hungry by this point.

I was happy to breastfeed but I don't feel very good at it right now and am a bit defeated. Want to persist at least for few more weeks so she gets a bit more.

Thanks for your comments. I know I'm doing the best I can, I just hoped it would come a bit easier but the important thing is she's fed and gaining weight

My eldest was just a hungry baby. Some days I sat and fed her ALL DAY. It’s a real story of demand followed by supply. In the end it all came together. If you really want to breast feed, you need to stop the bottles - not immediately, but cut them down fairly quickly Your supply needs a hungry baby to get it going. It’s easier Dn for a baby to use a bottle so they stop making the effort. I had a C section too and i think it impedes the start, but it can improve. Good luck, I’m sure you’re doing brilliantly.

Oh and I NEVER got a drop pumping until the day I went out for the day and no baby. Then I could tell how much she was actually getting.

Op breastfeeding is really hard and sometimes people don't talk enough about the challenges. Lots of mums have to combi feed in the beginning but you should be getting support from a lactation consultant? Have you seen one? They can lend you a hospital grade pump and it's important to check the flange size is correct to maximise output. I found la leche league invaluable support, they'll have lots of mums who've combined fed and exclusively pumped etc who will be able to support and advise you. Have you had an assessment for tongue tie as that can affect latch and how effectively baby can drain the milk. It's also worth adding that baby will seem hungry at times,
In the early weeks babies will cluster feed. My son fed for over 9 hrs one day on and off. Its very intense and if you're not prepared for it it will look like they aren't getting enough but it's how they increase your milk supply by demand feeding. You could try power pumping and I found eating lots of oats helped me with supply. It's really intense but if she's having a bottle instead of feeding you would need to be replacing the feed with a pumping session if you want to increase supply, if you don't it essentially can tell your body to make less. But ask for a referral from your hv to a lactation consultant ASAP as they should give you a pumping strategy and hands on help for latching etc. And go to a support group because honestly it's so difficult and exhausting and heartbreaking feeling you're struggling with it and you're not alone. And ignore the posts about bf that make it look easy. I've got to 7 mths but had to navigate tongue tie, pain, the intensity and medication eradicating my supply and ds dropping lots of weight. It's not straight forward and you deserve support.

I was at your stage at one point with my son. Have you tried nipple shields? A kindly midwife gave me some when she apparently wasn't supposed to. Helped us with a latch until he decided one day he didn't need them.

If you want to carry on get the baby to the breast as much as you can. Seek support of struggling with latch as a few adjustments can make the world of difference.

Have you got a BF clinic near you? I went to one which was absolutely amazing and helped with latch, it was a really easy fix that meant the baby was able to feed much easier

I also spent quite a lot of time on the sofa in the first weeks with the baby latched on getting supply up, you can do that and enjoy every moment of her basically attached to your boob