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Postnatal health

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Original poster

Birth injury-3rd degree tear- sphincter repair

32 replies

Ouchhh · 27/06/2023 21:51

Not sure if this is the correct place to post but I wanted to reach out in case anyone has been/is going through a similar thing! Apologies in advance this post talks a lot about poo.

So I gave birth to my beautiful son nearly 3 weeks ago, back to back labour, forceps and an episiotomy. Thank god he is absolutely perfectly healthy.

We were sent home the next day & in the following days I noticed I was completely constipated but also leaking poo. I spoke to a few people about this and was told this can be normal after having a baby but as a FTM I had no idea!

So I ended up back in hospital with a missed 3rd degree tear. After many excruciating ‘manual’ examinations, a very painful enema, a rectal scan , an MRI , 10 days of relentless diarrhoea due to antibiotics, constant fecal leakage, my episiotomy stitches opening due to constantly being wet from poo and constant showering, many days of not eating right because of surgery dates changing, fear of going to the toilet too much & having to eat a low residue diet, bowl prep , surgery to correct the default in my external sphincter, I’ve now been back home a week recovering.

The last week has been hell in terms going to the toilet and the general pain from surgery. Can’t have anything stronger than paracetamol and Ibrophen due to constipating effects (ended up having to have a suppository after taking Tramadol) then taking mild laxatives is giving me diarrhoea, it’s like I can’t get the balance right! Also I’m still leaking poo throughout the day and constantly sore and showering 😞

I’m absolutely heartbroken that this has happened to me in such a precious time in my baby’s life. The last few weeks have been such a blur , I’ve been so poorly and really struggled to look after my baby as I would have liked to during all of this. Thankfully I have great support from my husband and our family but god knows how I would have managed this on my own!!

I feel so angry and scared that this could be my life now, even though I’ve had surgery I’m still leaking poo and still have very little notice to get to the toilet for the ‘main event’. I know it’s still early days but it’s so difficult to be positive, it’s all been so traumatic. Usually I’m such a social person but I’ve shut myself off from friends during all of this, I can’t cope with the thought of telling people I’m incontinent. As I have to rush to the toilet and shower frequently I don’t see a way of avoiding telling people this or realistically how I can go out of the house and do normal things? It’s just so degrading.

Anyway, this post is very long and rambly (sorry about that!) so I’ll shut up now but please get in touch if you’ve been through something like this, I could really do with others who understand to talk to ❤️

OP posts:
SunshineIndoors123 · 05/10/2023 14:39

@Ouchhh glad to hear things have improved for you, though sorry to hear you're also still having some problems.

I can relate to the pain in the scar tissue, I still have that 14+ months down the line, despite doing loads of massage etc, I'm still having pain, particularly during sex. Saw the GP last week and been referred to gynae so I'm waiting for that. We wanted to start TTC again this month so it's all a bit disheartening really x

MumofCrohnie · 05/10/2023 15:24

Ouchhh · 05/10/2023 14:13

@MumofCrohnie thank you ❤️

This is definitely something I've thought of but anytime I've mentioned it I've been told it's unlikely. Sorry for the stupid questions but- Do you know what the signs of IBD are apart from diarrhoea? For example, what would my blood tests show? Can IBD be controlled by diet? Ive not had problems since I've been eating bland but obviously don't want to eat bland forever! Doing a bit of an elimination diet at the moment , introducing things slowly.

I'm having an ultrasound on my abdomen soon as my CA125 was slightly raised. The dr didn't seem overly concerned though.

Colorectal surgeon seemed sure my fistula is from my episiotomy/ sphincter repair breaking down a bit. It is in that place too. So hopefully he's right... 🫠

Hi there
IBD blood tests - obviously not an expert but slightly high CRP (DD's was 12 iirc), high platelets, high ESR, anaemia, low vitamins and minerals (shows in brittle dull hair). General lack of energy. Plus diarrhea which smells very foul.

If you have had an MRI you are probably ok though as this is one of the things they do in Crohn's to check narrowing of intestines etc so risk of fistulas. I assume they would have spotted any general inflammation?

MumofCrohnie · 05/10/2023 15:25

IBD not controlled by diet - but some people manage our the worst reactions by sticking to "safe" foods, but they will still be generally inflamed etc.

margegunderson · 05/10/2023 21:50

Mumofonexo · 01/10/2023 18:10

Sorry for being daft but what problems do episiotomy’s cause later in life?

I've encountered women on meno groups where the scar degenerates as oestrogen levels fall. It's common in those groups of women who are having vaginal/vulval/bladder meno problems but no idea how common in the wider age group. But it does seem to come as a complete surprise to them and it's good to treat it early by knowing what to look for/what the treatment is.

Hann376 · 20/05/2025 17:37

Ouchhh · 27/06/2023 21:51

Not sure if this is the correct place to post but I wanted to reach out in case anyone has been/is going through a similar thing! Apologies in advance this post talks a lot about poo.

So I gave birth to my beautiful son nearly 3 weeks ago, back to back labour, forceps and an episiotomy. Thank god he is absolutely perfectly healthy.

We were sent home the next day & in the following days I noticed I was completely constipated but also leaking poo. I spoke to a few people about this and was told this can be normal after having a baby but as a FTM I had no idea!

So I ended up back in hospital with a missed 3rd degree tear. After many excruciating ‘manual’ examinations, a very painful enema, a rectal scan , an MRI , 10 days of relentless diarrhoea due to antibiotics, constant fecal leakage, my episiotomy stitches opening due to constantly being wet from poo and constant showering, many days of not eating right because of surgery dates changing, fear of going to the toilet too much & having to eat a low residue diet, bowl prep , surgery to correct the default in my external sphincter, I’ve now been back home a week recovering.

The last week has been hell in terms going to the toilet and the general pain from surgery. Can’t have anything stronger than paracetamol and Ibrophen due to constipating effects (ended up having to have a suppository after taking Tramadol) then taking mild laxatives is giving me diarrhoea, it’s like I can’t get the balance right! Also I’m still leaking poo throughout the day and constantly sore and showering 😞

I’m absolutely heartbroken that this has happened to me in such a precious time in my baby’s life. The last few weeks have been such a blur , I’ve been so poorly and really struggled to look after my baby as I would have liked to during all of this. Thankfully I have great support from my husband and our family but god knows how I would have managed this on my own!!

I feel so angry and scared that this could be my life now, even though I’ve had surgery I’m still leaking poo and still have very little notice to get to the toilet for the ‘main event’. I know it’s still early days but it’s so difficult to be positive, it’s all been so traumatic. Usually I’m such a social person but I’ve shut myself off from friends during all of this, I can’t cope with the thought of telling people I’m incontinent. As I have to rush to the toilet and shower frequently I don’t see a way of avoiding telling people this or realistically how I can go out of the house and do normal things? It’s just so degrading.

Anyway, this post is very long and rambly (sorry about that!) so I’ll shut up now but please get in touch if you’ve been through something like this, I could really do with others who understand to talk to ❤️

Hi OP I hope you’re doing ok! Is it ok to ask if things have improved with you ? Xx

ouchhhhh · 20/05/2025 19:15

Hey @Hann376I’m the original poster. Doing a lot better thank you nearly 2 years later! Awful reading everything back, I really was in a horrible state.
Have recently been to st marks in London for an assessment as I still have some issues that aren’t going away with normal pelvic floor physio -consultant said I would benefit from bio feedback which I have never been offered. Also been told my issues will probably get worse with the menopause but I’ll cross that bridge if and when it comes to it.
I did in-fact sustain a 4th degree tear , but only just found this out recently. Still on going tummy problems which I think made the whole situation worse.
Just a really unfortunate combination but I’ve learnt to deal with it all the best I can . Back at work now and trying not to let anything stop me from living my life to the fullest!! Thank you for asking 💗

Hann376 · 20/05/2025 21:01

ouchhhhh · 20/05/2025 19:15

Hey @Hann376I’m the original poster. Doing a lot better thank you nearly 2 years later! Awful reading everything back, I really was in a horrible state.
Have recently been to st marks in London for an assessment as I still have some issues that aren’t going away with normal pelvic floor physio -consultant said I would benefit from bio feedback which I have never been offered. Also been told my issues will probably get worse with the menopause but I’ll cross that bridge if and when it comes to it.
I did in-fact sustain a 4th degree tear , but only just found this out recently. Still on going tummy problems which I think made the whole situation worse.
Just a really unfortunate combination but I’ve learnt to deal with it all the best I can . Back at work now and trying not to let anything stop me from living my life to the fullest!! Thank you for asking 💗

That’s great news!! And yeah no point worrying about that now :)

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