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As with all health-related issues, please seek advice from a RL health professional if you're worried about anything.

Postnatal health

STUGGLING ALREADY

7 replies

yvonneb13 · 18/02/2023 01:13

Hi everyone my beautiful baby was born (emergency C-section) only a couple days ago and I am struggling already he was small I'm absolutely terrified that everything I do I wrong and I'm gonna hurt him I can't stop crying I feel absolutely Terrible I feel like I'm failing already.
He seems okay he's settling but I'm ngl it's all down to my DP he's been amazing total natural just gets on with it doesn't stress while I'm totally panicking about everything he spat up a few bubbles and I thought he was choking and panicked I'm just so on edge and it's ruining the time that's meant to be the best. Any tips welcome PLEASE I'm a first time mum.

OP posts:
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LadyGAgain · 18/02/2023 01:21

Hey new mummy! Congrats on your safe arrival. He is being well looked after . YOU matter. Your hormones are all over the place PLUS you've been handed a new born and told to get on with it! How you're feeling isn't abnormal unless you want to walk away in which case that's likely true PND and you should talk to your midwife. You should also talk to them about how you're feeling now but, please, know this could be very normal. I felt this way.

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Magnoliamarigold · 18/02/2023 01:25

Oh OP sending you hugs.
This describes me seven months ago - my baby is well and thriving now, and was also then :)
Take each day slowly and get everyone around you to do everything. Your job is only to hold the baby, love the baby and feed the baby. Until you are well enough to stand and walk around, do minimal.
You're doing fine. If there's anything the matter the heath visitor or midwife will let you know.
Talk to your midwife or health visitor - call them.
Make yourself comfortable on the sofa and get into some box sets on tv. You are recovering from major surgery and you need to take it easy.

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NOTANUM · 18/02/2023 01:33

Congrats on the arrival of your baby! What you’re feeling is entirely normal after the high of birth and the hormone fluctuations. You’ve also been through the trauma of a c-section too and need time to recover. Is the health visitor coming to visit every day? If so, talk to them about how you’re feeling and they can reassure you. 💐

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Girlmum22 · 21/02/2023 08:43

It’s very overwhelming at first speak to your health visitor about post partum anxiety I had this and panicked about everything. I hope your okay

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GQJordanNutrition · 21/02/2023 11:16

Hope you're starting to feel better!! As someone else mentioned you're recovering from major surgery and also pregnancy (which is quite depleting nutritionally). I had the same experience with my little one 6 months ago, I found that lots of nourishing soups/stews and magnesium helped with my 'high alert'. Wishing you the best over the next few months - you're doing great!

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Hungrycaterpillarsmummy · 21/02/2023 11:22

You could have Baby Blues - it is a thing and is very fleeting but does take a few days to get past

Babies are hardier than we think but it is great you have a partner doing their share. You've been through a huge operation, you have a baby, your hormones are flying around all over the place. You can't expect to be serene and all knowing so soon. This is one big learning rollercoaster you're on.
If you still continue to feel this way after a few days please speak to your HV.
Try and sleep! Have you other family that can come and help out so you can rest and heal?
Congratulations on your little bundle. X

From Google:
What are the baby blues? Baby blues are feelings of sadness that you may have in the first few days after having a baby. Up to 4 in 5 new parents (80 percent) have the baby blues. It can affect new parents of any race, age, income, culture or education level.

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RoseslnTheHospital · 21/02/2023 11:30

Your partner has not had to deal with a massive hormone shift, and recovering from major surgery whilst also looking after a tiny baby. It's a big change and a big experience for new mothers. It felt a bit like a rollercoaster that I had no control over with my first DS.

So, try to give yourself a break and remind yourself what you are coping with. You as a mum are primed to be alert to your baby and to worry about how they are, it would be a worry if you weren't. You're not ruining anything, and being a first time mum isn't always the best time! We are fed a lot of high expectations by the media/society/etc about becoming a first time mum, and a lot of it glosses over the practical realities.

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