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Dealing with jealousy?

1 reply

suninthefog · 04/10/2022 09:19

Fuck. I thought I was over / dealt with my birth trauma but a very close friend had a baby recently. I'm happy she didn't have a horrible time of it but now these horrible feeling of jealousy are taking over!

At 3 weeks her baby is sleeping 4/5/6 hours and she's been able to walk her baby on her own. She's also coping really well with taking care her of baby, playing etc. I know it's not all sunshine and roses and people tell you the best parts of they day etc. but fuck it can't help but compare.

I couldn't take of my baby on my own for a long time. I couldn't breastfeed. I couldn't walk for 8 weeks. I probably have long lasting health damage. My baby at 2 still doesn't sleep much, still taking a bottle in the night. The mental scars are so intense that we are likely to only have 1 child. I still have intense periods of hysterical crying if I think about that first year.

Plus I had a pregnancy / birth in covid, we were by ourselves for a long time.

How to get over it? Therapy? What kind?

I'm already on a ton of drugs to get through the day. That's all my GP does.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
jadeftm · 17/10/2022 12:48

Ah it is hard when it seems like others are getting on so well and you’ve found things difficult! And easier said than done but try not to compare, everyone’s experience is different and people only show the highlights of their lives.

I believe there’s a service where you can talk through your birth with a consultant to help you understand why things happened the way they did - not sure if that would be something that might help you come to terms with the birth trauma? My HV mentioned it to me, perhaps you can ask your HV about it?

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