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Postnatal health

As with all health-related issues, please seek advice from a RL health professional if you're worried about anything.

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Original poster

should I have seen my health visitor more?

14 replies

pistachi0nuts · 26/07/2022 10:06

Something has been bothering me since my child was born in November 2020....it was a little while ago now (he'll be 2 this November) but has only been weighed twice, the last time being when he was 6 weeks old. Am I supposed to have had more regular visits from the health visitor or is this totally normal? Do I need to weigh him? I have no idea if he is tall enough etc. I mean, obviously if I was worried about him I would have taken him to the doctor but it just feels like we were completely abandoned. I had self diagnosed PND after he was born and despite telling my health visitor I had suicidal thoughts there was no follow up, there was nothing. I guess maybe I am just venting. But anyway was wondering if anyone else had a baby around the same time (or not...just wondering how often others saw their health visitor)

Thank you

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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DenholmElliot1 · 26/07/2022 10:10

I think you've answered your own question here - if you were worried you would have taken him to the GP.

You don't have to weigh him if he's growing out of his clothes and you are buying him new ones that means he's growing.

However I did think that there were supposed to be developmental checks sometime around 8 months and 18 months but that might have changed since i had a baby maybe some younger mumsnetters can answer that.

Idontgiveagriffindamn · 26/07/2022 10:12

Obviously things were different with covid. But I think I saw the health visitor once at my house with both of the kids. I got them weighed out of the house at drop in sessions at childrens centres / doctors. I went more with the eldest than the youngest and generally only when I wanted to ask something or is coincided with wanting to go to a stay and play group at the same place.
It sounds like you needed more support with PND I’d advise going to see a doctor about that and cutting out the HV altogether

Chocoqueen · 26/07/2022 10:15

I guess covid played a part? My DD was born last summer and I had a couple of visits (maybe 3 max - can't really remember) when she was born, I think the last one was at about 6 weeks. And that was it until her 12 month check, where I was given an option of it being over the phone or in person. I did call them a couple of times with a question but that's it, and could have arranged to go and get her weighed, but that was on me to do and not standard.

ForeverandAlways4 · 26/07/2022 10:17

Wow, so sorry you're going through that. I didn't have that experience at all. In fact I thought my HV came round too bloody much. I feel like you've been neglected especially as there was no follow up for you PND.

I could remember a few weeks after I gave birth my HV asked me specifically about PND and made me fill out this questionnaire and she did the same again every few months.

I can remember DS was weighed and height was checked a good couple of times up until he was 3 and she would write stuff about his development in his red book. In fact she's coming around later this week for another developmental checkup.

girlmom21 · 26/07/2022 10:18

We hardly saw health visitors with mine both pre and post covid.

With the first there were lots of baby clinics we could attend ourselves and the health visitor was contactable if we needed her.

DistrictCommissioner · 26/07/2022 10:25

The routine offering where I am is a new birth visit (around 20 days old), a 12 month review and a 2 year review. Contact in between is based on parent need/wishes.

houseofboy · 26/07/2022 10:28

I have a ds also born in November 2020, we had a weighing at 3 months and 6 months as well as 6 weeks I think from memory. Also had 1 year check up so definitely more than you had. I think how health visitors operated during covid varied across the country.

Original poster

pistachi0nuts · 26/07/2022 10:35

Thank you for your replies...I can see it varies greatly and must depend on location. Sometimes it just helps talking to other Mum's about these things so thanks

OP posts:

BiscoffSundae · 26/07/2022 10:37

I saw my hv once and this was pre Covid,’in my area after the first visit you are expected to take your child to the clinic to get weighed they do not come to you anymore.

EsmeeMerlin · 26/07/2022 10:47

When I had ds1 8 years ago you didn't have health visitors visit bar one when they were a newborn, you had clinic to go to to get baby weighed and you could contact the health visitor if needed. The were not enough health visitors so you really did need to contact them, they wouldn't contact you. You also had yearly check ups but you could opt out of them. With ds2 who is 4 I didn't take him to be weighed once and we declined his 2 year check up. I just didn't feel the need for them. As it is ds2 is now under a health visitor as he is going through a autism assessment and she is great. I just emailed for a health visitor appointment, got a call and then an appointment 5 days later although we now live in a different area where there are more services. I imagine it's been different due to COVID. You could always contact a health visitor or your go if you are concerned about your child's weight.

HumunaHey · 26/07/2022 10:52

It's shocking that you told your HV you had suicidal thoughts and she did nothing to follow up. How are you feeling now?

Danikm151 · 26/07/2022 11:13

It’s a postcode lottery with HV.
we had no home visit at all due to lockdown but my friend had at least 3 and a drop in clinic. I had to beg for an appointment to get him weighed as I was concerned about his reflux and growth. The rest was tick box exercises over the phone

Original poster

pistachi0nuts · 26/07/2022 11:22

The local weigh-in clinics have literally just re-opened this week so going to one of those drop in clinics was never an option. @HumunaHey she looked at my partner smiling and said he needed to make me more cups of tea....thats all I got. that left me feeling so stupid. I now realise that what I was feeling wasn't really 'normal' and that I could have done with some proper support. I am much much better now thank you for asking.

OP posts:

ItsAllABitMuch · 26/07/2022 16:27

pistachi0nuts · 26/07/2022 11:22

I'm sorry she was so neglectful and dismissed a clear plea for support. Some people are in the wrong profression. It was brave of you to speak up even if she did FA about it.

It doesn't make up for what she did but I'm glad you're feeling much better now. You may not want to, but it's not too late to put in a complaint. Or very matter-of-factly raise that you told HV you were suicidal and got no support. Did she put any notes of your feelings in your DC red book?

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