Postnatal depression help?

[VixxieRae]

Looking for some advice from fellow mums as I feel I'm losing my mind. My little one is 6 weeks old and is my 4th baby but first with my partner of 5 years. I've suffered with anxiety since I was 14 (now 26) I dont feel it's got worse since having bub but the health visitor said she's quite concerned about me and it's made me feel crap as I thought I was handling things pretty okay.. She asked me to go to the gp and maybe medication was an option. I did discuss with her that I wasn't comfortable with taking anything while im breastfeeding as the medication I was on before had a sedating effect. Not only that after she left my partner started asking why I hadn't told him I was struggling with things when I dont feel I have been. I'm tired yes, baby is up every few hours to feed and doesn't want to go down or to anyone else atm but that's all normal and I was expecting it. Did anyone have postnatal depression/anxiety and not really realise it or would you definitely know?

I think everyone gets some form of baby blues op and it's hard to admit to yourself let alone anyone else if it's pnd. Remember it's nothing to be ashamed of (I should try telling myself this) and help is there if you feel you need it. Hope you're OK x

I didn't know I had PND. I found it really hard with my first baby, and when he was about 12 weeks old, I had a bit of a meltdown over something so insignificant I can't even remember what it was now. But I handed DS to my dh, and ran sobbing from the room. DH booked me a doctors appointment, and quite gently but firmly told me to go and tell the doctor exactly how I was feeling. So I did. I explained that I was exhausted, and finding it difficult, but all new mums did, surely, even though DS slept through most nights by that time, and that I was getting tearful a lot but that was just the tiredness surely (even though I couldn't work out why I was so tired). And that sometimes I wasn't sure I was doing it right, but that's normal too, right? And that I felt a bit lost, and a bit overwhelmed sometimes, and by this time I was sobbing in my gp's surgery room.

She told me it was perfectly normal, lots of women go through it and it can be managed. She prescribed a low dose of sertraline for me, reassured me it was safe for breastfeeding, and told me to come back in a month, or sooner if I needed to. The sertraline helped me a lot, it was unpleasant at first but the effects settled down after a couple of weeks, and I felt so much more like me again. I had no idea how bad I had been feeling until I wasn't any more.

It's hard being a mum especially a new mum. And even if baby sleeps through, you don't! I've been having bad dreams since dh said he wants ds in his own room soon, often quite disturbing dreams where I wake up almost having a panic attack. I've not been to the docs yet but if it carrys on I might need to...

@katmarie @Jesskir89 thank you both, I guess it's best to be safe and have a chat with the gp just incase. I was on sertraline before I was pregnant and it knocked me out for at least a week I couldn't stay awake so I'm a little nervous to try that as I really dont want to give up breastfeeding. I'm glad you felt better @katmarie after getting help! I think I've been convincing myself I'm okay when I'm not really, im angry a lot which I never used to be and my patience is just through the floor. I guess I thought PND would show differently.
@Jesskir89 I can relate to how you feel on moving baby out into their own room! My son was premature and I kept him in my room till he was 3 as I just couldn't sleep if he wasnt there! I needed to check on him multiple times throughout the night otherwise i would go mad. I did suffer with PTSD with him as my pregnancy and labour was horrific. I would get yourself booked in to the doctors if it continues as you will get to the point you can't function x

Op I will I'm going to give it a few week and see how I go. I don't think having a lockdown baby helps anyone either it's been a tough year. Hope you're feeling better x

Anger and loss of patience were massive symptoms for me, which again I just put down to tiredness, but now I know that when my temper starts to fray and I start to get irrationally angry, its time to take a breather and fall back on some help. Medication is one aspect of managing pnd, but talking to my dh and letting him step in and support me, lowering some of my standards at times, and learning when to let things go also has made a difference. I'm on baby number two now, and I've had pnd again this time around, but I spotted it earlier, and have managed it much better.

With the sertraline, its shit for the first week or two. I felt like I was either in a fog or on the verge of a panic attack. But after a couple of weeks it settled down. With antidepressants you do need to give them a good chance to work, its not an instant fix. And they help, but they are not a solution in and of themselves. I found that for me they helped me get to the point that I could start to take active steps to feel better, the guilt at taking some time for my own needs and hobbies was less, and spending that time also helped me feel better. They gave me the breathing space to be proactive about my mental health.