I have an almost 5 month old boy who I absolutely adore. However over the last couple of months my patience with him has worn so thin, I find myself so angry when he cries or when he won't sleep, I've even shouted and thrown things (away from him obviously) and even had urges to leave him in the house and go for a walk when he just won't stop screaming. I find being at home with him unfulfilling, monotonous and sometimes I'm resentful towards him for taking every ounce of my time and energy. It would be a lie for me to say I've not had some suicidal thoughts and I long for the days I was child free. I never thought I was able to have children so it did come as a shock to find out I was pregnant, and was totally unprepared for motherhood. I've tried talking to my husband but he is certain that his life has changed as much as mine has, and that I should just try and make more 'mum friends' with baby groups etc. I don't have anyone else to talk to about this IRL as my 2 best friends are both pregnant so I don't want to scare them. I love my son so much and I just want to be able to enjoy him, please help me work out what I need to do to get out of this mindset.