PND or just knackered?

[legalseagull]

Baby is four weeks old. Second baby. DD1 is just 1 year old. How did you know you had PND rather than just the normal hormones and tiredness? I'm exhausted, stressed, anxious etc. At what point is it something to worry about?

I haven't had my 2nd yet, but had PND with DS 4 years ago. I can't really remember when I finally acknowledged that I was really struggling, but I didn't go to the GP until around 4 months postpartum...

Do you have a husband or partner who can judge from an outside perspective? It was my DH who finally pushed me to get checked out because he could tell I wasn't coping, even when I tried to convince myself I was.

On the other hand, if your LO is only 4 weeks old maybe you need to give yourself another 2-4 weeks to get over the rough patch - those first few weeks are the hardest!!! And fingers crossed everything might settle down a bit when LO is a tiny bit older.

Sorry, hard to say really :(

On top of being bone tired I felt totally disconnected from everything, my brain was ridiculously foggy, like someone had stuffed it with cotton wool so it couldn't hold any information. I would get so much rage (which I internalised and never showed outwards) and also day dreamed about going to the airport and just starting over without anyone and kids. Out of the other side of my PND when I was tired I was just tired although now, if I have a run of really bad sleep Some of the above creeps back in.

Everyone's experiences are different though. It's great you have an awareness that something doesn't feel right. Like PP said, keep and eye on it and see how you feel after these really tough, early weeks bottom out a bit x

Oh yes, the rage! That terrified me. I wanted to shake DS and scream at him. So scary.

And helpless feelings, too - totally irrational and morbid, I'd feel like this was NEVER going to get better and I couldn't see a way out of the hell I'd found myself in.

I had the anxiety side of it. Extreme anxiety and panic attacks and afraid to be left alone with the baby as the crying sent me in to a panic. I researched getting a nanny to help me, wanted to go back to work to escape. I didn't want my husband to go back to work as I felt I couldn't cope or do it.
This then made me feel very depressed and at the point when I didn't want to hold him one day I went to the doctors as I knew it was a downward spiral I wasn't going to get out or without some help. I was only 3 weeks in and it came on very fast and strong at 5 days out of nowhere. Mine was magnified by the loss of my mum I believe too, I was still grieving. Everyone is different though I believe so if you feel you need support make an appointment as I actually went at 2 weeks when things weren't as bad just to talk to the doctor. I went back again at 3 weeks when it got much worse.

How are you feeling now OP? Just realised your post is a few weeks old so want to check everything is ok. Have 2 children myself and with both just felt disconnected with everything including the children. Fantasied about running away, couldn’t stand to be alone with DD1 and taking her out on my own sent me into a panic.

Thanks for asking. I'm ok thank you. Struggling with anxiety but generally think it'll pass eventually. I have lots of intrusive thoughts but I try to push them out of my mind. I struggle when exhausted but thankfully baby is sleeping a bit better now.