Post natal depression or is it me?

[SugarPrincess67]

For the past few days I feel like I’m not myself. The only people who make me happy are my children.
My youngest is 9 weeks old. She stays awake all night and during the day she naps, but only on my shoulder. Her first and second naps are in her sleepyhead. That’s when I have my sleep, which is about 4/5 hours a day. My housework is piling up so I do what I can even if a little. I look like I’ve been hit by a train, I use to take pride in my appearance now I don’t.
My husband isn’t happy about this and tells me to wear make up or try a little bit but to be honest I don’t have the time to.
My sex drive has completely gone, I don’t even want to kiss or hug my husband. In fact I’m thinking of leaving him and I say it with such ease without even having reasons. I want him around and I don’t want him around.
My FIL lives with us too, he has a heart of gold. However there are so many things he does to annoy me. He interferes and this has caused a massive argument with husband and I. His hygiene levels aren’t what they should be, I have to constantly watch him handle baby and I’m sick of having to tell him to use hand sanitizer once. He doesn’t understand germs spread through coughs and sneezes. I have to change baby every time he touches her.
We have a mous infestation which is getting worse day by day, we can’t afgled pest control, we’ve stuck mouse traps nd glue board but we haven’t caught one mouse. I thought to buy a cat, it can be part of our small family and also scare away the mice. I got excited, found a cat and we all went to the supermarket to buy the litter and food. FIL came after, pissed me off with some he said/ she said and I left the store im anger. It
Was mainly to do with my husband. So now I don’t even want to look at my husbamd or FIL. I’m being so cold towards them. I feel so alone and isolated that I don’t know what to do.
I cry to myself and just hope that God takes my life away

I am not surprised that you have no interest in your husband if the most helpful thing he can add to your day is to tell you to wear make up!

Have you spoken to him to explain how tired you are, need some help instead of negative comments?

Are your negative thoughts only toward on your home environment / occupants? Or toward every day life / everyone?

@SugarPrincess67 i feel like i couldve written your post myself. I was always crazy in love with my other half and now i just cant stand him, i have also been thinking of leaving without any thought.

My baby is 6 months and i love her so much but i feel so alone and empty inside.

My DP works alot and spends some time at the gym each day, i feel like i really need him but at the same time i want him to go away.

I have no energy for my appearance anymore and feel so disgusting and shit. Yesterday we had an argument because my inlaws have been rude to me and he never tells them to stop. I feel like nobody cares about me, Im totally lost and sometimes think everyones life would be better without me.

Im sorry your feeling this way too, i have nothing to offer in words of help but i just wanted to reach out as my own mind comes to terms with what im going through.

I’m so sorry you’ve both been having such a rough time of it. I had postnatal depression after my son was born nearly two years ago, I went to hell and back. But you WILL feel better. Things do get easier. Definitely try to get out of the house when you can it’s a god send, and do something for yourself even if it’s just a bath! We all lose our identities when the babies enter the world unfortunately. I was lucky that I had a very supportive partner and my mum close by, I don’t know what I’d have done without them tbh. Please talk on here whenever you want or feel free to message me. X