15 months PP and still feel completely wrong

[Diorissimo1985]

I would really, really welcome any advice from others who have experienced similar as I'm quite despairing now

I had rather difficult labour and recovery with DD, nearly 15 months ago. She was a big baby (nearly 10lbs), I was induced and it ended with forceps/episiotomy/extended tear/PPH.
My recovery was long and horrendous and I struggled to move, sit, lie down for weeks. I only felt like vaguely okay about 8 weeks PP.

Anyway, DD is now 15 months and I'm still not right. I'm so fed up of my body feeling like this - I will try to keep it brief but my symptoms include:

• terrible pain when passing stools (I have to do deep breathing and cry out with pain)
• sore, burning joints, especially my hips and pelvis
• urinary incontinence - I leak when I cough or don't make it to the loo in time
• excessive hair loss
• painful sex
• lack of libido
• zero concentration
• low mood

I have been the the GP and she seemed most interested in my joint pain and is investigating if I have rheumatoid arthritis - tbh that's the least of my problems! For my issues with going to the loo she just recommended a fibre-rich diet (which I do have)...

Does anyone have any advice or if they've experienced any issues above? I'm at my wits end and could really do with hearing how you have fixed things.

Sorry for the long post!

Sorry forgot to mention that I am also still BF, approx 2 feeds a day

Hi I would go back to the gp and get a referral to a gynae and a physio for pelvic floor.
Don't let them fob you off - I only say to refer you to both as a pre empt in case you go to one and it's the other you need.
Im not a doctor but some of your symptoms sound hormone related. X

Hi op , some of your symptoms sound similar to what I'm going through at the moment. I have low oestrogen and like you 15 month post partum. Have a look and see what you think and mention this to a doctor.

Thank you both for your replies!

Ivegotalpen can I ask what treatment you're having to address the low oestrogen?

My second delivery was similar to yours (the first wasn’t a picnic either but the second caused lots more damage😣). On the painful sex/lack of libido (pretty much linked I’d say) I went to see a private gynae who thought it was the scar tissue rubbing that was causing the pain but before going for another knife to fix it she recommended time...I truly found sex awful for about 18months but it did after that very slowly get better (to be honest I think a couple of years😬). Definitely follow pp’s advice and ask to be referred to a post natal physio - they should be able to help with the incontinance. Could you also ask to be referred back to the post natal ward for someone to check how your back passage was repaired/if there’s scar tissue causing an issue there? - I spoke to one of the maternity ward consultants about my issues when I was pregnant with no3 and she said they’d always be happy to check over their work if there were ongoing issues....worth an ask at any rate and if that’s not an option ask for a referral to someone else. On the hair loss, low mood & concentration I’d definitely ask for a blood test to have your thyroid checked at the very least. I’m so sorry you’re going through this💐.

Thanks Blinking I have had blood tests previously but all that came back was vit d deficiency so I'm taking a supplement now.
I will see GP again and raise all the above.
It's really affecting my quality of life in all aspects tbf - the lack of concentration is making my professional life a nightmare

Also Blinking - I see you went on to have no 3! Did you have a elcs? We are considering DC2 but I can't contemplate it if it were another vaginal delivery and if it went badly again

Definitely get a referral to a physiotherapist who specialises in pelvic floor issues. They can help hugely. You don't have to live with incontinence and pain. Did you have a 3rd degree tear? If so did the hospital do follow up with a specialist? I had one with dc1 and had follow up with scans and pressure tests. It sounds like you need specialist treatment if you are still in that much pain. The hair loss is common after having a baby but the suggestion of a hormonal issue is worth following up.

The weaker bladder is common, exercises help but I also recommend discrete underwear (great for periods too). I didn't really settle until after I quit breastfeeding (about that age) as hormones are elevated until then but the joint pain is worrying so your dr does need to investigate. As a side note I was getting bone pain in my legs and was set to make a drs appointment, I asked my brother who was visiting if he would watch the kids, but he solved my problem - every time I boarded the bus I knocked my leg with the buggy, I was so used to it I didn't realise! (No flat entry then so you folded it)

@Diorissimo1985 I've got given some estriol cream at the moment to see if that helps With the oestrogen, the doctor also told me it might help with my bladder problems as apparently low oestrogen can weaken your ureatha and give you uti like symptoms ! Im having to have another blood test and internal scan as like you have a few more problems. Mainly with my bladder and pain still in c section scar ! It's a nightmare so I feel your pain.

However the hair loss etc definitely sounds hormonal and I know you can develop thyroid Problems after a baby. You mention vitamin D I was also like you found to have very low vitamin d and am on tablets for it twice a week and will probably have to take them the rest of my life ! So I can imagine that isn't helping with how you feel either . for you....

Hope you find answers soon I understand the frustration.

Yes Dior baby no 3 was a c-section!! I had to speak with 2 consultants over the course of the pregnancy as they are keen to persuade you otherwise but you just have to keep repeating the ongoing issues and not wanting to exacerbate then. A c-section recovery isn’t a bed of roses either but as I kept saying to myself I can at least see the stitches & keep them clean😬.

Hi- I’m so sorry to hear your feeling this way. I also had a v difficult birth and long recovery (not all the same symptoms but some)
First thing I would advise is to go and see a women’s health physio that does manual release work use this link

pelvicphysiotherapy.com/list-of-therapists/

You can see someone on nhs if referred by gp but I found the waiting list so long and 6 weeks between appointments just wasn’t enough so I only saw progress when I went privately (this isn’t everyones experience I think it just depends on your local hospital and I was unlucky) . They will be able to help with the stress incontinence and painful sex. You may have some tense muscles that can improve with trigger point release work.

Are you bleeding with bowel movement ? It maybe an anal fissure. Again mention to gp as there are creams you can get. Also google alternative treatments for anal fissures and there’s a great blog post someone wrote about healing theirs. Also google squatty potty - life changing for toilet habits.

Regarding the joint pain tiredness etc there is a book called the balance plan that is excellent for understanding your hormones and symptoms and also has lots of recipes.

Hope this info helps. I found doing my own research helped a huge amount. It just felt like I was doing something to help myself.

I have nothing to add, but i hope that you are able to get help to mend you and that you feel better soon,

Get yourself some stool softeners, Laxido or Movicol are the brand names. I wonder if you have an anal fissure which is causing you pain. Even if it isn’t, stool softeners will help.

Op I had a very similar experience to you (induction, forceps, episiotomy, large PPH, though my baby was a pound lighter than yours) and I urge you to push this with the doctors.

I went to the doctors a few months after I gave birth with a slight prolapse and all they did was take a quick look and agree with me. I really should have pushed for more but I had just found out I was pregnant with dc2. The doctor basically told me to do a rigorous routine of pelvic floors.

Luckily my dc2 birth was much much easier on my body but I do still find if I stand too long or do too much my womb sort of area is very achey and the prolapse seems to come back.

Mine was no where near as extreme as yours and I am still finding life difficult at times with it, so I really do urge you to push about this.

Thank you so much everyone, I really appreciate the support.

Yes there is bleeding with bowel movements - what is the treatment for anal fissures? I take it they don't heal on their own or surely the pain would have stopped by now?

They do heal on their own, slowly, provided your stools are soft. If they’re hard, the fissure opens up every time you go to the loo, which is why it’s so very painful.

But please see your GP to confirm. You shouldn’t be in agonising pain when you go to the toilet, obviously! They can prescribe numbing creams too, if appropriate.

Thank you. I will make another GP
appointment this week.
Thanks again for all the advice, it is so reassuring

Get yourself some lactulose, you can take it long term or as and when. But definitely get checked out too.

I have nothing to add either but hope you get better. There is not enough support for women

I wouldn’t recommend Lactulose personally. It gives you awful wind and isn’t nearly as effective as Laxido.