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Postnatal health

Loss of identity

1 reply

emily199027 · 11/12/2018 21:50

I'm just wondering if there's anyone else out there feeling the same? I had a baby girl 7 months ago and I have a 3 year old too.
For the last few months I've just been feeling lost and like I have no idea who I am.

I feel absolutely terrible for how I feel because I have two amazing children, a brilliant husband and generally a really lovely life. But I find myself crying myself to sleep when my husband is on nights, crying in the shower. Just generally lost.

After a few days I tend to build myself back up and I'm ok but slightest things can trigger it off. I'm just wondering if anyone else feels the same and like your identity has gone too?

(I understand I'm a mum and life's never the same btw!)

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Slavetominidictator · 11/12/2018 21:59

I've felt like that, to varying degrees since I had mine, who are now 3 and 6. It improved significantly when the youngest turned 2 and then even more so when she hit 3 and went to pre school most mornings.
I ended up being a sahm which compounded it, then my husband was diagnosed with a degenerative, terminal illness so I become his carer too, which exacerbated it all further, amongst all the other griefs.
I suppose my point is, it's very normal and it passes. This is a very tough phase of your life with two little ones where their every need seems to trump yours. It won't last forever. I used to do the odd thing like sticking a lipstick in with the online supermarket shopping, but it often only served to highlight the incongruity of the trappings of the old me in my new life........

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