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Postnatal health

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Do I have PND?

6 replies

ahijaw · 30/09/2018 03:34

My child has turned one. She has been exclusively breastfed. She is very very clingy and attached to me. She doesn't go near her dad even though he tries his best. When we are ou and about if lo doesn't want to sit in her buggy I m the one who has to hold her since she won't go to anyone else
It gets tiring quickly since she is getting heavier and I m a small bulit woman.

Ever since she has been born I have always felt like swtich in my personality or in me has turned off. I m not the same person i used to be. I was confident, prepared and hardly ever forgetful and liked dressing up. But ever since she has been born I have slowly let go. I don't take pride in myself i hate to admit i slack in my personal hygiene sometimes i will shower a couple of days later then intended. I don't care how i look, my legs aren't shaved my eyebrows are unkept. Basically i have literally let myself go.

I have become increasingly forgetful i forget where i put things, i lose things. I cry a lot by lot I mean a lot. Today was worse i started slapping ajd clawing myself while crying and in all my life i have never ever cried so loud or selfharmed. Today i contemplated harming myself.

My mothering is nothing to boast apart. At 1 she is still breastfeeding a lot and doesn't eat much. I feel like i fail ny daughter everyday. She deserves something better then me. Even writing this is making me cry.

For whoever read this thank you. I don't even want to read what i have written so please forgive my grammar. I honestly don't recognize myself. I was a confident woman before now i m a crying mess and always unsure of myself.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
WhyBird2k · 30/09/2018 03:39

It does sound like your mental health has been affected. Please see your GP ASAP or or speak to your health visitor. Some of things you mention like not doing legs and eyebrows might be "normal" but considering self harming definitely isn't. Look after yourself and your child and seek professional help. Flowers

kayakingmum · 30/09/2018 03:41

Oh dear, poor you.
Try not to beat yourself up- metaphorically or literally :)
I'm sure your a great mum - your lo clearly thinks so. Are you planning on going back to work? I work part time 3 days a week. It's nice to be able to put the working hat on and baby hat off some of the time.
I hope you feel better soon.

Bushbaby85 · 30/09/2018 04:11

I think you should visit your gp :(
I’ve never had PND as I am currently 41+1, but I have had pretty severe problems with depression over the past few years.
PND is something I have worried about and I think you should at least speak to someone xox

Pantheon · 30/09/2018 14:31

I'm sorry to hear that OP. I'm sure you're doing a much better job than you think. How much sleep are you getting? Do you get any time to yourself? I think talking to your hv or gp would be a good idea x

Charlieislovely · 01/10/2018 19:00

I am so sorry you are going through this. First of all WELL DONE for putting it on here and voicing your worries. It is so hard to make the first step by talking about it, but I promise you that feeling this way won't last forever. How long have you felt this way?

I had postnatal depression straight after my son was born 15 months ago. I was a different version of myelf and felt no connection with him whatsoever. I became increasingly depressed and anxious, and resented him for taking over my life. It upsets me to write this now because I love him more than anyone I would die for him but I want you to know that you aren't alone!

It must be so hard if your daughter is clingy and won't go to anyone else, that alone could make anyone feel low. I would suggest to your husband that you have some alone time once a week, start off by taking just an hour and leave him with her for that hour. She will probably cry but it will do the both of you good. Have a long bath or go outside, go for a walk or meet a friend. Then you can gradually up it to a few hours, I make sure I take a break every Sunday and it has been an essential part of my recovery.

You also need to book in with your GP and chat to him/her about this. It may seem scary but honestly they will only want to help you. I did this pretty much straight away and am glad I did, they referred me for counselling and it was a godsend.

Lastly, I just want to say you are doing a great job, your baby has a mum that loves her and wants to do right by her, you have breastfed until she is one which is an absolute achievement, be proud.

You can message me too if you'd like to chat!

ahijaw · 18/10/2018 02:44

Thank you everyone for your messages. i have went to my gp and he gave me some medication to take but i m not sure i want to take them since i m still breastfeeding and i have talked to my health visitor about it and they all have been very supportive. I just hope i get out of this soon and enjoy my being a mother to my daughter. Thank you again xx

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