Hospitalisation for PND?

[scrambledeggbrain]

Would it be incredibly selfish to be admitted to hospital for PND?

Baby is 3 months. DS is 4 and autistic. I'm stuck in a Groundhog Day situation wherein I seem to be repeating the same three hours on a constant loop. Feed. Burp. Play. Change. Sleep.

I can't remember what it feels like to stay in bed all night.

My son hates our baby and won't go near it. If the baby cries he panics and cries too. I can't let the baby cry.

Not so DH doesn't get up at night. Claims he would but never has. Ever. I tried to ask him to get up once. He said 'Ok, just a minute, I'm just waking up' while the baby became apoplectic with rage. So I got out of bed and fed it because it would've woken DS.

Who can relax or rest if they know their babies needs aren't a priority? Not me. So I get up. Every three hours. Or less.

DS wakes up too. Sometimes once. Often twice a night. I settle him. I go back to bed. Then the baby wakes up.

I've started thinking about how good it'd feel to be kicked in the stomach, or punched in the face. I'm afraid of knives, they look too tempting. I wouldn't hurt anyone except myself, I just want my body to match my mind.

I know I have PND and I know it's bad. DH knows. Friends know. I've been referred to the crisis team for severe PND. They say I'll 'get a letter in the post'. But nothing is changing now. And I feel so trapped.

Before you suggest it - no. I don't have any family or friends nearby that could take either DC to give me a break.

I'd book myself into a hotel for a night. Which is exactly what I did when I felt desparate. I planned it for a couple of months and just knowing that there was a break on the far distant horizon helped.
What support are you getting for your PND?

I think you need to call the out of hours GP and tell them what you've said here. I had pnd with dd1 and medication was life changing for me. Life does not have to feel this way, it is hard to take the first step of asking for help but it will be worth it. When I was depressed I felt there was no way out, bit there is, try to take hope from the fact that many people have felt as you do and sucessfully come out the other side. When I look back it feels like looking at a different person.

You would only be admitted to a psychiatric hospital if it was clinically needed, and if community management wasn’t working or wasn’t safe.

If your husband know you have PND he should be getting his arse our if bed.

Show your post to your DH. Need needs to be getting his arse out of bed and taking on more than his fair share.

I am very cross that a man would share in parenting, even more so when his partner is ill.

Contact your gp and tell them all this. Sounds like you maybe need a little more support from the healthcare system.
I was asked if I felt I needed to be admitted when I was struggling, but didn't feel as though I did. There is more help, but sadly sometimes you need to fight for it.
Does dh work? Could he take a couple of days off, or call in sick so you can go off somewhere for a night or two?

Psychiatric wards are really horrible places. I would get as much support as possible from the community services available. There's lots of support available. PND is really crap but treatments can really help