Feeling alone

[rainyday2017]

Hi, this is the first time posting on here.

I had my daughter in September two weeks early(she just couldn't wait wanted to meet us).
I opted out of going to prenatal classes as it's not really my cup of tea, now that she's here everyone is telling me to try going to these club. I will be going when she's older when she can interact. I'm second guessing and thinking about going sooner in hopes of meeting other ladies like me.

My partner is a brilliant father don't get me wrong but I feel so alone in all this, he's a big gamer and constantly wants sex from me. it's making me so depressed to the point where I don't tell him anything anymore in fears of pissing him off. I have no friends bar a mutual couple friend who had a baby a few weeks before us, I can't talk to her I can only smile and pretend everything is amazing. When she's swimming through parenthood.

I guess all I want is some advice maybe someone to talk to! Maybe someone is in the same boat as me?

I’m so sorry you’re feeling alone in this. You could try a group and see how you find it

I go to a stay and play group where you can pop in and stay for as long/little as you like.

Do you have any family near by that you can talk to?

You could try talking to your friend, she might not be finding it easy once you get talking.

I’m sure I appear to be doing okay but I’ve spent a lot of time in tears today as I can’t get my DS to settle. He’s nearly 5 months

It is really hard when they’re little but it will get better

Hi I'm sorry you're feeling alone. You're not alone, you have a beautiful baby that depends on you. Stay strong for your baby. I'm a new mother and I had my baby in September also. I stay home with him and my partner works, so I'm up all night with him and have him all day until he gets off. I did have some feelings of resentment for him, when we first came home and he went back to work but I realized we are on the same team and he does what he can. Please talk to your partner about what you need, and do what's best for your baby. Oh and tell him about your lochia, maybe he won't be so tempted to try it anymore. I'm here if you want to talk. Take care, good luck.

Hi ladies, thank you for responding. I have yet to even look into a group so I'm not helping myself yet. Things haven't really changed at all. Your advice on the sex front wouldn't help he doesn't care if I'm bleeding. I honestly don't think I'd Mind unwinding and thinking about it but I'm so exhausted from doing everything all day it's the last thing on my mind. It's the little things 😓 like don't tell me you'll do the dishes every day until I can handle it anymore and do it myself. He can't handle looking after our daughter for five minute while I try and have a bath. He's a gamer so that is pretty much his life. He'll be in for a shock when she starts wanting to play and needs more attention

This makes me so sad reading this, I'm sorry things are so difficult. It makes me cross that you're not being supported enough :-( Although groups are not your kind of thing, I would give a few a try - you may not like them all but even if you find just one that you like, you can have some time away from the daily house stuff, and you will find other people who may be feeling exactly the same. Or there are things like yoga with baby where its less of a baby-focused group? Worst case could you get some help at home eg. a cleaner once a week just to take a little pressure off you? Good luck, I really hope things pick up x

Hi, you are so brave to actually open up about this, I'm actually in exactly the same boat with you just not the sex part but no judge there.. its been 3 weeks after the C-section for me now and I feel so isolated..
You are not alone.

Hi - first off refuse sex if your not interested.
Second talk to your friend! Most of us just give off the appearance of holding everything together especially when it's the "expectation" perfectly normal to be feeling the way you are.
I couldn't bare the thought of sex for ages after having my kid. And if others people feel like it after being up all night, being sick on, being pooed/peed on, haven't had a shower all week well haha not for me.
Look after yourself they say you can't pour from am empty kettle so be a bit selfish and make sure you are getting a bit more rest and tlc. You say your oh is a good dad then get him to do more while you recuperate.