PGP Post Birth and struggling

[Karmin]

Hi my Ds3 is now 19 weeks old, I had severe spd/pgp during pregnancy to the result I was on crutches and taking morphine.

Had a very quick birth that following induction took just over an hour at 37 weeks, ds3 didn't really look ready to come out but my waters had broken, the birth was more traumatic and when he came out he was grey and taken to resus as he had some breathing issues.

Due to mental health concerns and depression I was kept in for a couple of weeks and self discharged as they were running out of excuses to keep me, ss suffered from neonatal abstinence syndrome and they were keeping an eye but he was fine to recover without medication.

He is a very high maintenance little one, his sleep is poor and he really needs constant contact and entertainment when awake, if you go out of sight he screams and sleeps poorly except when he is on me or DH

On top of this I am struggling with my hips still, I don't need the crutches anymore but I am still useless, I can't walk far and struggle to carry anything including ds when the pain is bad, following a 2 hour trip to family when we walked to a park about the distance away of a couple of football pitches and back I was in agony to the point of having to take morphine again, I get told I will get better and that things will improve but I'm getting sucked down with the constant pain, I am not being a mother to my 3 boys and I am useless, sex is very painful and I feel my relationship with do is under strain because I need so much support.

I wouldn't give ds3 up for anything but I am struggling to be his mum, I am shattered and in pain and he is still waking up 3/4 times a night, I gave up breastfeeding to see if that would help with the hormones going back to normal but if anything my hips are getting worse.

Had a doctor appointment today, which has left me feeling more hopeless than before, spent half of it in tears explaining how difficult I am finding everything and was brushed off and dismissed.

I have to give it more time she will put another physio referral in but doesn't think that it will help, I should take more painkillers and rest more.....

Aww poor you it's so hard. I had pgp in pregnancy, had crutches and was on codeine. Now ds is 7 months and it still bothers me when I walk long distances but I dont need pain killers now. So there is hope, but I understand how difficult caring for a baby is when they are small and mobility is an issue (I also had to have surgery on my lower back when ds was 6 weeks, not related to pgp). I spent a lot of the first 6 months post natal not able to do much.

Few things have helped me:

• co-sleeping, with pillow between legs, hand under pillow, baby under arm/near breast so can easily feed and hopefully you only need to turn over a few times in night and not get out of bed. (obviously only works if breast feeding and cant be done if you are on strong painkillers. I would recommend a cosleeping crib if you don't want to get out of bed or share bed either)
• exercises on a birthing ball to strengthen core and pelvic muscles. I had physio in pregnancy and would do pelvic tilts.
• Try to get someone else to push buggy when they are about and use crutches for relief.
• Contact the pgp charity for more advice and tips. Also check out their website, so useful!
• sometimes ibuprofen helped me more than opiates (obviously not ok in pregnancy), also could talk to GP about naproxen. Anti inflammatories seem to help pain in joints more for me

Good luck, it will improve but I have been there so can completely empathise xxx