FEB 2010 No longer newborns!!

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

Three months and counting, everyone! Our babies are gradually getting the hang of the world...and we are gradually getting the hang of them...

No solids here yet either midnightsun, though I'm quite looking forward to it now. DS is 24wks today. BFing is so portable and available on tap that it's been the easiest thing to do. He can sometimes sit unaided for a bit before loosing balance and is making caterpillar moves towards crawling . He sits in his highchair now at mealtimes and plays away quite happily. He's also managed to feed himself a beaker of expressed milk and get some in his mouth! I just wanted to give it a shot, cue proud mummy moment!

Those tantrums sound awful, not a clue how to cope with that, I wouldn't even know where to start.

Hope everyone had a lovely weekend.

just marking my spot?. another week starts - hello ms nice to see you!

Hi midnight, good to have you back. I don't think you are that far back weaning my DD was one of the first born (she is indeed a january baby) and she is very advanced for her age (according to the peads and MW). So if you DS just reach 5 months they are 1 month appart already. It is amazing how quickly they change at that age! Last week DD2 was just on a few spoonful of fruits and veg at lunch and diner, since then I have introduced breakfast, and a few days after 2 proper meals.
For the tantrums, DD1 is now 5 so a bit more mature, no more tantrums, but some sulking and crying. But before DD2 was here, we did had major tantrums especially on holidays. What worked is taking out privileges (no TV, no park were the best for us, but you have to find what works with yours). I don't agree with the UK perspective that tantrums shouldn't be punished. They can be distracted though and calm down before they erupt. I have always explain to her why she was punished and why tantrums are not acceptable once she has calmed down. Same with kicking, bitting, shouting... but honnestly I haven't had to deal with that since she was a toddler, somebody with a boy might help you better on that one .
Guilt also work, like "you have spoilt the whole familly day by your behavior so nobody had fun not even you, and we won't be able to do the trip to the beach, the movie, the restaurant, visiting freinds... if you do that again"

Also some 1 to 1 time since DD2 has arrived seems to make her deal better with the situation. Even if it means less familly time or parent time, she react very well with half a day with mum or dad only doing gorn children things, and then is much better with the baby or familly.
My DD needs a lot of explaining, "we are going to do that now and you need to wear that ..." I talk to her a lot and explain to her what's going on... My DH often just expect her to follow within minutes (put your shoes, we go out, time over, switch off TV now...) and it does create tantrums. I am more "we need to prepare the diner so 10 more minutes in the parc and then we go home" "put your snickers we are going to go running in the parc, if you put your sandals you might hurt yourself" "we need to go shopping for lunch when the cartoon finishes go put your shoes on" you see my drift. I rarely gets any tantrums with her unless she is overly tired.
Good luck and remember it will pass (and at 4 it will be soon) It is also always worse visiting or travelling and within the 1st few days of holidays and being back home. I did make me wonder about the necessity of holidays for a while with DD1.

BG I boiled the bottle water for the first few months now it is straight form the bottle (unless somebody drank form it directely, but I usually open a new one instead).

Sorry for such a long post. Hope you have a nice day and the sleep becomes better.

that would be "grown children things".

We were at freinds over the week end, and DD2 was on everybodies knees for lunch times. She managed to grab a huge drumstick of chicken tadoori, and with just managed to get it out of her grip in time. She wasn't happy with it at all, even if she already had her lunch... I am restricting her BLW and probably making her have issues with food, and traumatising her.. . We were debating if children in 'hot' countries (india, mexico...) have spicy food so young or if they have different things from the adults and gradually spice up?

Midnightsun, my DD1 (coming up to four) is also being very hard work at times, so I feel your pain. Like your DS, most of the time she is lovely, but at times she can be an absolute nightmare. I have no advice, but am trying what mamaloco says by rewarding good behaviour and not letting her have the "nice" things if she plays up. So if she plays up at bathtime, she only has one story instead of her usual two, and if she is well behaved, she gets a sticker as well as her stories. I also do the explaining thing (but I do that even with DD2 and she's only five months! No wonder my children talk early!), and think it helps. It can feel at times there are reward schemes for too many things and that we're constantly negotiating with her, but it does seem to be working. Slowly. Good luck x

As for spicy foods, I introduced DD1 to herbs and spices while she was still on purees, so I would do her a chicken curry with everything except salt and a bit less chilli, or a tagine with everything except salt. She always wolfed them down, and even now has a pretty adventurous palate (her favourite food is sushi, closely followed by things like Japanese and Indian food). Even earlier than that, I would do things like apples with cinnamon, or rhubarb and ginger, and she never complained.

mamaloco re spicy food, I have friends with three boys and the mother is from Thailand. All three children ate seriously hot food from a very young age... I witnessed it once and couldn't believe it. She (mother) would adjust the food for her husband (English) because it was too hot for him!
Thanks for the advice on bottled water mamaloco and GF I will do that now when we go away for weekends.
watercress I have also always added herbs etc to purees and dd1 was eating curry at 7 months (mild of course)and was really keen on things like olives and capers. She's slightly fussy now at 3 but I am not making a big deal out of it because she still eats really well. dd2 has had her fair share of herbs and garlic, or things cooked with a bay leaf added etc.
midnightsun my dd1 is 3 and has had her moments but because of her age she can be easily distracted. Would go along with advice from the others, and I am also quite strict on her with age appropriate explanations on why her behaviour is not acceptable. Oh, and I bribe her a lot , in extreme situations with the promise of sweets (this is very wrong according to parenting books but it works extremely well especially because she only ever has sweets as a very special treat). Have also noticed that dd1 needs frequent snacks and goes totally bonkers if she has not eaten for a few hours... Something to do with blood sugar levels I am sure.

I don't have any older children but I agree that tantrums shouldn't be ignored. The child should be told that it is wrong but if you know what the reason for the tantrum is I think it is good to acknowledge why they are upset eg. "You were asked to share your toy and I understand that it upset you but we have to blah blah" and punishments should be immediate because children of that age don't really understand that the future exists so I'd take the toy away then and there for however many hours. I think saying to them if they were bad on Thursday that they couldn't do such-and-such on Saturday is too far into the future for them to see the connection. This is for under-5s.

We are not on solids yet either. Still BF exclusively (With some expressed bottles). He's nowhere near sitting up on his own.

I enquired about the local nursery that I like (state run) and I can put his name down when he's two - so I have put a reminder for Feb 2012. They take them from 3 and a half. They say that they don't take attendance at the nursery into account when admitting to the primary school bit of it but I really want him to go to the primary school. It is rated outstanding by Ofsted.

Sleep was a lot better last night. Not great but I feel rested today so no bad thing. Tried to get him to bed at 7, finally went at 9. Slept until gone 2 then woke at 4, 5, 6 and 7. Has now been napping from 9 for just over an hour. I expect he'll wake up soon.

Was very anti-routines at first but I think we are falling into more of one now.

midnightsun Good to see you.

Stoof what news?

Oh, we ordered a red Tripp Trapp high chair for when he starts sitting up at the table. Can't wait for it to arrive.

Just to reassure everyone, my LO is also one of the older ones on this thread (3rd Feb), hence the weaning, sitting etc.

My DD2 is also towards the older end of our spectrum as she was born on Feb 9 (one week early). But she was only a wee thing at 6lb 2oz and last week was only 13lb 2oz so may well be at the smaller end, but i think that means her muscles can support her tiny weight! And I was advised to wean her as her weight gain was dropping (she had been on the 9th percentile but went down to the 2nd).

There's a picture of her at cid-d6fbc20143a0f941.skydrive.live.com/redir.aspx?page=play&resid=D6FBC20143A0F941!109&Bpub=S DX.Photos&Bsrc=GetSharingLink

Really hope I've done that correctly! Anyone more technically mided than me - not hard - please tell me if I've done something stupid.

She is lovely, she has gorgeous big dark eyes.

To make a link clickable you put two of these [ symbols at the start and two of these ] on the end.

watercress she's gorgeous!!

DS is also part of the oldest (born 4th Feb) he was 7lb4.

Last night was odd, he fall asleep as normal but woke up just before 11pm crying and we were not able to calm him down. His eyes were closed like if he had a fright during his sleep and didn't know how to get out of it. It took a lot of kisses and cuddles to re-settle him.

I only use some herbs for DS food, still not ready to pureed our own food s I use quite a lot of spices and don't think they'll be good for DS.

bc and watercress such gorgeous dc's. In fact I did a doubletake when I saw your ds bearcrumble because he is so similar to mine. On the sleeping front too. Or rather the lack of it. Last night was actually pretty good but the last couple of days he has been a nightmare to settle for naps. He is just so into everything he can't seem to switch off. Literally the second he wakes up he stuffs his top into his mouth, grabs a foot and looks round for some unsuitable stuff to investigate. If there is none available he starts complaining. Dd was much more chilled than this so it is a bit of a shock.

Also not weaning here yet as ds is only 23 weeks. For those of you with concerns over BLW there is really no need. I know it takes a leap of faith because we have been raised to see purees as the only way forward, but BLW is more like the way weaning has been done for centuries, before the invention of the Magimix! Dd forced my hand by refusing my lovingly produced purees and of course I was nervous at first, but she never had any choking episodes. I certainly don't think BLW is a 'better' approach, just a different one, and not one to be nervous of.

My dd, age 4.4, sounds just like all yours. An angel most of the time, but my goodness, can she be naughty when she thinks she hasn't had enough attention. And so bossy. No idea where she gets that from......

chinook beg to differ on how weaning was done for centuries... Babies were given pre-chewed food rather than offered a chunk of food and left to get on with it! I have seen this in Africa and it is as close to pureed food as you can get. So the extreme form of BLW is actually quite child-unfriendly because they really have neither the coordination nor the skills (esp if teeth come through late) to cope with solid bits of food AND get the nutrients and calories they need.

BG agree with you on the kiss feeding front. Apparently the typical thing is for mothers to pre-masticate food then transfer it to baby in a "kiss". This also gives baby some enzymes. Presumably, mum could chew more or less according to how baby deals with lumps. Was just reading about this in Baby Wisdom and had an epiphany of how babies must have evolved to be brought up.... feeding at night leisurely, sleeping on the go in a sling, sleeping with people, being held constantly and during weaning having gradually more and more solids during the parent's mealtimes (mum would just share some food with baby as she ate) and less and less milk as they get older. Explains a lot of why babies are the way they are.

I'm soo tired. DS woke up every hour since 12am til 4am for about 30mn each time. Luckily DH did the 3am feed but still I was awake. I'm very tempted to call sick but got a big file in Court this morning so I need to be there.

Have a good day

DD2 was born at 37 weeks at 8lbs4 on 28th of jan. she also had some kind of head control from birth like me and her sister, so shouldn't really be compared to other babies. I was also medically advised to wean early (4 months), so she has had some advance practice with eating.
To reassure you DD1 was really early on a lot of things, but at 5.5 she is a really normal girl and can't be distinguish from some of her peers who didn't walk before 2. Same with eating, appart from a few utterly fussy kids and one extreme case who still only eats if her mum spoonfeed her ( she eats fine when the mum is not around), they are all the same.
I agree with BG and sunangel, indeed, I have chewed some stuffs for both my DDs, when they refused too big a piece or been stuck out with no appropriate food. It just comes naturally, even if I had a few when I was out.
Extreme BLW, when babies are left to choose from adult food and just deal with, can work if your LO is not intereted in food, nnot hungry and still wants plenty of milk. No way it will suit my hungry [buiscuit] monster. She was hungry and not interested in more milk at all, she can do BLW, but due to her teeth there is a lot o big pieces which are swallowed whole, I had a few choking accident, and she would be eating all day long to get what she needs.
You wouldn't expect them to walk straight away, they have to learn to seat 1st, them crawl or stand, then walk. I think it is the same with learning to eat. They have steps to go through. Most animals regurgitate thier foods for the youngs.
My post wasn't against BLW, you have to do what suits your child, but that particular little girl was clearly hungry and couldn't deal with the food she had. She would probably be happier with some kind of puree, instead of constantly asking for milk. I would be equally sad to see a toddler being refused finger foods he wants to eat to be stuffed with puree.
Around 1 yo DD1 refused anything pureed but she already had about 10 teeth by then may be more.

bear and watercress those are lovely babies.

midnight I also do some of BG and bear tactics. The sweets promess, because she rarely get any, it works very well, and I explain to her that I understand her anger, or that I know it is difficult to have a baby because it is hard for us too...

CC yes your post was clerverly written, pitty you didn't get many answers.

Does that works? www.facebook.com/photo.php?pid=317045&id=100000294841610

Where is my smiley giggly baby gone? LO has been incredibly unsettled the past two days which is really unlike her. Hoping it is 'just' teething (dd1 got hers in sets of four..)but feel a little at a loss trying to work out how to help her

GF your night sounds terrible. Hope you manage to get through the day somehow. Strong coffee?

If you want/need a laugh www.parenting.com/gallery/Mom/Ridiculous-Parenting-Products/22/
As you can see I am bored/tired and shamelessly letting DD1 watch TV and looking after DD2 crawling in the living room, I am such a bad mum
BG mine too, if I remember correctly it was about 1 set of teeth every month or so? She is also frustated when she hit a corner of the room, or when going backward instead of forward. She is really happy when she can catch some of her sister's paper and eat it.
GF sorry about the night, I am back on coffee after more than a year without

Cute babies, BC and watercress!

WOMAD was absolutely fab - DD loved it, full of smiles and managed to nap in nests we made her on the rug wearing baby ear-defenders - very cute! Loads of people were infected by her huge grins when we danced with her - a highly successful experiment, she's definitely a festival babe!!

Weaning is very inconsistent here (she's a January baby, but 4 weeks prem) - DD still isn't massively interested, but is content to taste things and try the odd spoon of puree. It's tricky because we're not at home and don't have a high chair. Once we're back and kitted out, I'll start weaning in earnest.

Meanwhile, DD is getting pretty good at sitting up on her own. Her sleep is up and down, but mine is definitely improving with help from the hypnotherapy. Maybe I'll try hypnotherapy on DD

DD is slowly teething - it's not at agonising levels, but stuff is happening beneath the gumline. I think it's having an effect on her digestion - we're getting only one poo every couple of days and it's really stinky and concentrated plus loads of smelly farts (TMI!!) - I don't think it's the weaning that's causing it as she's not having solid food all that much at the moment. Anyone else finding this?

Toddler tantrums...ooh, a treat in store!

Good luck bethylou with the tests...

mamaloco love that website! The hands holding a baby in a side position are just creepy.

IC wonder if your own diet over here and difference in water affect your milk and then your LO... Just like my LO having problems with formula made with the water in the Midlands when we are away for weekends (well, one step removed for you via your food etc).

Another non-weaner here. DD is 22 weeks and showing no interest in food. I've given her a taste of fruit if I'm eating some and she looks nonplussed to downright disgusted . I'm going to wait until 6 months and then try both purees and finger food.

I've woken up with what I think is mastitis. A sore boob (that was getting progressively sorer througout yesterday) and feeling generally under the weather. I've only been ill with DD once before and then DP just happened to have a day off. I'm just not sure what to DO with her. Usually we'd be out and about but I really don't feel up to it today. After a few minutes under her gym she starts getting whingey. All I want to do is sleep! (even more than usual that is).

Sorry for self-centered post, all I can manage today .

Ah fizi, are you feeling better yet? There's nothing worse than feeling awful when you have a small person to look after. Have you called the doctor if it is mastitis?

Mamaloco you are not a bad mum, you just need a bit of downtime. Anyway, it's good for them to learn independent play!

BG, I feel your pain. My normally smiley, giggly DD had me stumped earlier when she had a half hour crying fit. I tried everything and she eventually calmed down when I sat down and played piano (badly, as I am only just learning) to her. I think she may have been struggling to poo, but she's been a bit off colour all day. Hope your DD has perked up.

GF you poor thing. Sleep deprivation is the cruellest mistress. Hope you survived your day and tonight is better.

IC glad the festival was good. I think you are very intrepid going with a baby. I thought I was being brave going to Ikea yesterday (why do people think it's a theme park? It isn't, so don't take all your children there for a day out.), and had to do an emergency nappy change in the restaurant (I was discreet, don't worry).

Chinook, my DD1 is very bossy. I like to say she has management potential if anyone comments on it!

fizi hope you feel better and agree with calling the doc if your feeling flu like. The day I got mastitis I didn't feel like I could hold her. Can you call DP home or get someone round to help?

mamaloco What you said about your LO having good head control from the moment she was born def. ran true over here. It was a shame about the lack of comments, but what surprised me was that it wasn't until I wrote the post that I realised I want to extend BF.

I can't believe she's 20 weeks, I'm finding it hard to keep track and will ave to switch to months. We're also not really weaning, plan to mush up some carrots today and see what face she makes.

Watercress she looks so grown up in that picture, which I realise sounds a bit odd.

Since she had two good weeks of weight gain, I'm going to hold off getting her weighed for another two weeks. Its weird not knowing her weight, but I'm trying not to be neurotic about it. She now seems quite long for her weight, so dresses are either too wide but right length or vice versa. But I guess a 4.5month old at 5kg and otherwise normal is going to be not the same proportions as the babies who are actually 0-3months.

We've not had much teething trouble for the last week, so I'm guessing that's due to come around. She does a weird thing with where she puts stuff on her gum and then wanks it out (e.g. tail of her comforter/my finger).

Not a great night last night, but only because she wanted to play in the middle of it. At least she wasn't howling, as I can't help but think of the neighbours. At least I can just some into work late, if its been a rough night.

I've started my first support thread on the feeding milk section, I was ever so nervous.

Epic post, sorry

Any advice from those with older dcs? My 3 year old has quite lavishly wet herself twice today, once yesterday. She is normally really independent and does not need reminding to go, so I wonder if this is just to get my attention because it appears to coincide with dd2 being very needy and unhappy the last two days... ? Rather lost it just now I have to admit and got pretty cross with her - luckily dh took over so I could go and calm down. Really don't know whether to ignore it or tell her off??
Sorry, don't mean to highjack a baby thread with a toddler question, but I was sooo angry just now