One small step for Baby, one large step (or mad dash to prevent disaster) for Mumkind

[ninja]

Hi, Welcome to the new thread, the one where we can't drink a cup of tea in peace (there you go, we could have used that for a title!!)

I was in bodyshop yesterday and M trashed the place. Luckily the sales assistant thought she was sweet as she pulled things off displays and legged it out the shop with jars of body butter (several times)!!, cue me legging it after her with a handful of makeup . Luckily there were no store detectives aroud. She also tried to wear every shoe within her reach at the shoe shop.

oh and can I ask you to spare some good thoughts/prayers/whatever your views are for a colleague of mine. She's just come home after giving birth at 33 weeks but her husband has a brain tumour which has grown not shrunk after chemo so he's back into hospital for some horrible IV chemo. It's the 3rd time he's had his tumour treated and I think she's preparing herself for the worst and perhaps there was a reason why their baby came early.
they're both so young.

ladies, i am ashamed to hear all these teeth brushing stories because i haven't managed to brush ds's yet. I bought that brush/massage thing they recommend, but he clamps his mouth shut. There is NO WAY one can get in. We've tried and tried. I figured that as he only has 5 teeth it's not so serious just yet... Am I wrong? Any tricks to elicit a bit more cooperation?

IMO so sorry about your friends. Life is just so bloody unfair sometimes. Here's hoping it all turns out well at the end

Thanks for your kind words - I am finding it hard to imagine what she is going through - a 2 week old baby and DH may be dying. Gives me a kick up the arse when I am tempted to moan.

Thanks for comments about bushing teeth - interesting comment starlight about tooth enamel & brushing within the hr. Now you say it, i thin I've heard that somewhere too. oops, must change morning brushing to before breakfast then!
Pacita have you tried giving DS his own toothbrush to hold in the bath so he can examine it and get used to it. that worked for us and now she has her one whilst mummy/daddy 'join in' brushing properly! Took a while though and she has only just started showing us her teeth for brushing, up until a few days ago we got the brush in but couldn't see much as she only opened her mouth a bit.

I think it's brushing after orange juice etc that's a problem. Also I believe that teeth are protected for an hour after brushing so you should be OK IMO

I have to admit I often forget in the evening

Soory about your friend IMO, you're right it does make you think when you thing things are hard doesn't it

A loves chewing the toothbrush but I only get round to doing teeth every couple of days, before bf and bed -I figure if I bf at night then just doing the brushing regularly is important. I felt better after asking my organised friend who admitted dc1 was 18 months or so before teeth got brushed and dc2 who is a month younger than A hadn't met a toothbrush on his first birthday.

Came home as A was polishing off 8oz of milk, changed him into PJs and plonked him in bed... he seemed to think something had been forgotten but fell asleep... touch wood...

Best wishes to your friend IMO.

I need to see the dentist so will take A along and ask for advice.

I have just stopped the breastfeed before bedtime this past weekend. Diego did not seem to mind one bit, to be honest. It had got to the point that when i took him to bed after his milk and cereals he was full and contented, and would stop feeding to point at the cot (as in, you may now take me to my bed, mother, I'm tired). I am now down to two feeds a day, morning and afternoon, and hopefully will stop by Christmas.

I wonder if my milk will disappear now that it's only two feeds...

Why won't DS just f*in sleep?

Am I just so rubbish at being a mum that I can't get my son to do one basic human function?

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.

90 minutes of screaming tonight and still going.

Last night he screamed from 1:30-3:30 then woke again at 4:30. Where's the off switch? Seriously....how come no one else has this problem? I'm doing something wrong. He's crying because we won't pick him up, we won't pick him up because if we do he wakes up when we put him down. He'll only sleep if he comes into our bed. But then he wants to feed every two hours when he is in our bed. My left nipple is pretty permanently damaged from bad latch during the night feeds (when I'm too knackered and blind to see what I'm doing). He's my everything, but right now I'm sick of this.

[shame] so sorry about your friend's situation IOM

DS is quiet. Don't know how long for. But he's quiet for now.

digi . If it's any consolation my dd is being a pest at night at the moment. She hollered for ages when I put her down and I fully expect her to wake up in the night, her molars are starting to poke through and I think they hurt like hell. I usually stagger in armned with calpol / ibruprofen (at the correct intervals mind, I'm not OD-ing her on it!) and it seems to do the trick. But her night time wakings seem worse these days as she is so bloomin' loud now.

IOM Sending good vibes and prayers to your friend and her DH. How crap, I can't think of a more polite way to put it.

I think I've got everyone's share of toothbrushing habits. I am dreadfully neurotic and even though it means causing a mad screaming match I always brush the dc's teeth morning and night, TBH I drive myself mad with it and wish I was more chilled out.

DD isn't really speaking yet, she seems to be saying banana, but it's not that clear. Why should she speak when she can just holler and wail and get what she wants .

ooooo, I need to use the new biscuit pic

DS quiet now, 2.5 hours later.

Oh DG I wish I could give you an answer to your sleep woes but I can't. I don't know why C sleeps and your DS doesn't - I promise it's nothing we've done, same as I wouldn't know why if she didn't sleep.
Only thing I do know is that you are NOT crap and it is NOT your fault. It will pass with time but in the meantime, you need some wise words of experience to get you through. If not here, then post on the sleep boards.
Can you and DH get a night off and get a trusted relative to do an evening at all - just to keep you sane?
Sorry I can't be more help.

IMO So very sorry about your friend. Desperately sad.

DG You sound like me 6 years ago!!!! My ds1 was an AWFUL sleeper. Truly awful. I spent most of his first year going round in a daze. First of all...YOU ARE NOT DOING ANYTHING WRONG!!! (repeat to yourself several times a day!)

I used to look at all the babies at baby clinic and feel so inept and useless. My ds1 was so little and always poorly and was such a "bad" sleeper and everyone elses baby slept through the night from 7 weeks, fed well and never even had a sniffle!!!!

Thing is, ds1 still isnt a great sleeper - 10 hours at best and even then he never sleeps through...we end up playing switch beds in the middle of the night! I guess I'm used to it. Wont be forever (she hopes desperately!)

Seriously, you arent doing anything wrong. It could be so many things...incipient illness, teething, maybe just separation anxiety...you need to give yourself a break.
I hate to tell you that some babies just dont need 12 hours sleep a night (esp. if they nap during the day)

I had to fight with Toby for 45 mins yesterday afternoon to get him to nap and even then it was on my bed with me next to him!!! Then I had to wake him to fetch ds1 from school...aarggh!

How about offering water at night instead of your breast? He might get the hint that mummy is off limits between 11pm and 6am!!!!
(disclaimer: I didnt bf so that may not be good advice!)

I think Toby slept better when he was between 2-4 months than he does now so to answer your question, no you arent the only one and you are doing nothing wrong.

B x

Digi I know how hard it is during the night, Robyn is waking at least once and from 5 in the morning is in our bed suckling for up to 2 hours. I need my sleep so just curl around her.
Both my others had sleep 'problems' i.e. didn't sleep when and how I wanted them to. DD would wake as soon as we went in to bed so me and DP slept downstairs for ages whilst we decorated her room. DS would only go to sleep if I laid next to him and and he played with my ear.

We just did what we needed to do at the time to let them sleep and let us get some sleep. At the mo DP is on the settee as when Robyn gets into bed there isn't enough room. She has managed to sleep through 3 times since he started doing this.

Pick a night or week when you feel you can stick to a routine and try whatever you want to try. Maybe offering water instead of bm. Or sitting up whilst bf, I found i would lie down with her then fall asleep so she ended up sleeping with us.
If you are persistent about it then he should follow your routine and sleep without waking. We've tried the NCSS for the last 6 months now and although robyn doesn't sleep all the way through she does generally get to sleep better and sometimes will wake up and go to sleep herself.

And you are not a rubbish mum we all struggle even those who say their nb's sleep through at 3 months (liars)

Whewre is everyone?
Off watching fireworks I guess, or soothing frightened babies.

Had Robyn's booster today, she screamed, had a little tear then gave me a big cuddle and forgot all about it. She's had ibruprofen twice and managed an hours nap this afternnon and now is looking ready for bed.
Poor child has to go through it all again next month when she has her hib C, then nothing until we decide to give her the MMR.

Any LO's still got cradle cap? I keep finding big flaky bits and when I tease them out I am pulling her hair out. Any tips on removing it easier?

Deb75 C had cradle cap when she was very tiny and we started to use Dentinox shampoo. It worked so well and is so gentle, we've never stopped using it and still use it today. We've not had cradle cap since. i doubt it would come back if we stopped but atm there's not another shampoo i fancy trying.

What is everyone else using in the bath btw, we're still using Johnsons Top to Tail - when do you move onto something more 'grown up'?

And can I just show off a bit (I don't normally but am so proud)?
C's nursery have revamped their menu and had asked parents for suggestions. I included suggestions for flavoured breads (eg tomato) and also mentioned savoury flapjacks that I make for C with cheese, oats & carrots in em.
Well, long story short, they asked for the recipe, the afternoon cook baked a batch this afternoon for the whole nursery and sent a sample home for me to make sure it was up to scratch! It's on the new menu, as is my suggestion of the breads!!

I am very proud - doubly so as the nursery is in a college and the catering school makes the nursery food, so the students will now learn how to make different breads!

[whispers] should I post in AIBU though - I haven't told nursery i got the recipe from mumsnet ..........(wanders off cackling)

Imo - I don't use anything in the bath, so not even as grown up as you , never washed her hair either ....

DG I'm with becaroo, it could be me 6 years ago. DD1 like Beacroo's DS isn't a great sleeper but does normally sleep through the night (unless she wets, but that's another story)

Tomorrow night will be my first night away from Maebh (if I decided to go). There's an Aikido event in Edinburgh. I'm not sure how the boobs or h (yes deliberately no D, but that's another story I'm trying not to dwell on) will cope.

My Grandma's also on her death bed so might not make it up....

ninja sorry to hear about your gran. And sorry to hear your H is not currently D, but I'm assuming he's done something bad. Hope you're ok and it settles down.

debs me and ds were watching the big local firework display out of my bedroom window. For the last couple of years he's been scared of them but this year I had the window open so he could hear the loud bangs and he loved it.

imo I still bathe the dc's in plain water, anything else aggravates their skin. I was letting ds use bath jelly for the last month but his eczema has flared up so now he's back to showers as they are kinder to his skin. When I was little we always used 'Matey' bubble bath but it will be a long time before I can use it on my two.

Still plain water in baths here, altho sometimes I drop a little top to toe in (tesco own brand I think).

DS went to sleep better but still woke at 3:30 and was crying in his cot while dh sat next to him (usually only cries when dh leaves). Couldn't take it anymore and brought him to bed. Still 3:30 is better than 1:30, so we could call that an improvement. I've been experimenting with withholding feeds when co-sleeping. There's a bit of a fuss but he does eventually get back to sleep. This could be my new plan of action, achieving cosleeping without the nightfeeds.

Sorry to hear about your gran ninja

DS did not like the bangs last night, was quite distressed but taking him to the window to have a look at where the noise was coming from seemed to help.

Took A to the local firework display (free and 2 minutes walk from home). He'd have enjoyed it if it started earlier but was flagging at 7.30 and after 15 minutes demanded bed (although got cheered up by all the distractions en route, mostly people with flashing bunny ears and light sabres). At least we've probably got another year before he begs for all the plastic tat?

Happily went to sleep again after just a bottle, but ended up bf at 11pm and 6am... although at 6.15 it became obvious his problem was actually a wet bed. So much for the Pampers '12 hours of golden sleep' promise... (I started using disposables at night as he was making even double-boosted cloth ones soggy). So been up since then, on our 5th nappy, laundry run and hung up, dishwasher emptied, and I'm finally having a cuppa now A has stopped screaming every 2 mins. How do I tell him that just because a poo isn't runny doesn't mean it's constipation and he needs to deal with it?

he doesn't want to be my h any more .....

Oh ninja . Would counselling help?

ninja...so sorry I second what DG said...would he go to Relate with you??

Toby is still ill - more ABs from docs last night. Ear infection. sigh.

Just cleaned the house top to bottom (dont want to dwell too much and what I swept up from the front room floor!!!) and have now got to go to tesco and then get back for 1pm to go and help in ds1 school, then off to PIL for bonfire...phew. Although it looks like its going to rain so probably wont be ablt to get the bloody thing lit!

Have a good weekend ladies xx