we did it, we did it, the babies are here, now come and join us and we will give you a cheer!!!!

[Dozymare]

Hope this works

thought i would start a thread for those of us already in the heady World of motherhood, so we can share the trials and tribulations of the early days....

I shall start with my birth story and hope other's follow and I haven't started a dud thread

As you know I was dreading a 3rd CS, almost to the point where I was having panic attacks - we went in on the Thursday and after waiting for an EMC we were taken to theatre where I was DELIGHTED to recognise the aneathatist (sp!!) who helped deliver DS2. Now, one of my major fears about a 3rd CS was the fact that having had a "perfect" excperience with DS2, it6 wouldn't be possible to experience the same thing again...I was wroing, it was better The whole thing was started at 1315 and Tallulah was born at 1344 weighing 7lbs 2oz. She has a shock of dark hair but seems so small compared to the boys who were 9 and 10lbs respectively. The care I recieved was absolutely 2nd to none - no complaints or gripes.........So far so good.........

HOWEVER.........my god, do you forget the pain of breastfeeding before the milk comes in - I am in absolute agony and have had to top up with aptamil as the poor wee thing is so, so hungry...I am literally BF for up to 2 hours (the point of pain in both udders ) and then topping up with Aptamil. She guzzles 30ml and then settles.......As for sleep - sleep is for wimps!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks again for all your well wishes with regards to James. He is so gorgeous and cuddly and it's nice to have him nearly normal again!!

I too have been doing laundry today - oh it's such fun!!

Best clean the loo and sink now - need to make an effort as it's not fair that DH is doing everything in the house, although he's happy too but he's back at work full time now and he'll just be knackered carrying on this way.

Wish we had snow, so jealous.

That's great news, that James is on the mend, mummynic!

Right bit of laundry for me, too!

Must be laundry day as I did a load too - might make DH hang it out though!!

DS is currently napping in the sling, at a non-GF time, due to our mother and baby group outing. I am going to try and bring the routine forward and hour so he still goes to bed - I hope it works. Oops, typing just woke him up so it might not!!

so much for laundry! I got about ten items folded and laid on the bed for putting away later.....and DS woke up. Then he needed changing, then he weed all over himself and needed changing, then he threw up on himself and needed changing again, then DD woke up.

DS just isn't feeding at all this afternoon. He roots and pecks and makes his little feed me grunts, but when I get my boob out he just sits there and doesn't open up and I can't make him. He's done that four times since he woke up earlier. Very strange.

Don't forget to add yourself to the Stats List is you haven't already. It seems there are many more boys than girls right now.

Leaks Oh dear to your afternoon. I have to admit that Z isn't eating as much right now, or is going for longer periods between feeds during the day, plus he can now pretty much be done in 10-15 minutes. Maybe Fin is just feelig a little under the weather today?

heellpppppp.

Erm, i hope this is where everyone is as i havent had a chance to log on since Sophie Ella was born a week ago today. I discharged myself from hospital after C section within 18 hours as i had a massive row with midwives in hospital who told me to give the baby formula as "your not the one who has to sit at the nurses station listening to her cry!"

i need some real help, Sophie is feeding about every 3 hours in day but at night time from 11pm - 4am she is cluster feeding, in the day she will feed herself to sleep but in evening she feeds, stirs and cries again, feeds, cries. im trying to catch up on sleep in day but seriously have no idea what im doing...on a positive note feeding has come so easy, no engorgement or sore nipples etc so its one battle won. Sorry that i havent had chance to catch up on posts but im seriously not coping very well and im feeling like a shit shit mother as Soph just cries and cried. i got cranial woman coming in a bit but i have no idea what im doing and i just cry with her.

DrsWife . Sorry you are feeling so crap lovely, but what she is doing is perfectly normal at this age. the levels of hormones involved in milk production are higher at night and babies will often feed more frequently at night because they instinctively know this. I know it's hard when you aren't getting sleep, but things do settle down. My advice would be to get as much sleep as you can in the day when she sleeps; forget the housework and get some ready meals/quick meals in.

There's some information on good old Kellymom about fussiness at the breast and what might cause it, but it is common for babies to do this whilst cluster feeding.

It's good that the feeding is going well otherwise, but I'm bloody and at the hospital MW who said that and if it were me I would be writing a strongly worded letter to the PCT, especially if the hospital policy is pro-BFing and they have Baby Friendly Initiative status. It's her job to help you, not complain about you.

you're doing fab you know, and baby blues usually hit around this time as well. much {{{{{{{{{{{hugs}}}}}}}}}}

Oh DrsWife. James was like that while we were in hospital (was in 5 days after c-section - I coped because I only came across 1 poor mw and she was lazy rather than rude). You have my sympathies, it's hard work. As leaky has said, it's normal and you have to 'go with it' at this stage - hark at me, the 3.5 week expert!!!!

My 'blues' hit when I came home, maybe it's the stress of surgery, hormones everywhere and the reality of being home that makes it all worse. You will get through this and you're fantastic, look at your gorgeous girl, be proud, take a deep breath and get your boobs out and read a mag all night - that's what I did - a good trashy one like Take A Brak is good as no intelligence is required to read and enjoy!!

Good luck honet

we need a new thread soon!!

Just put DS down to bed - a whole 1hr 15 mins early but GF said its ok so I feel endorsed!!

Bet he doesn't stay down though - its all been far too easy!

DW you sound like I felt after 1 week - things were so difficult and I felt like I had no idea how to deal with a baby - and I didn't!! The MW's just said thats how they were and it would get better and I know thats how some people get along with it but I couldn't cope and felt so out of control (I am a control freak!) so I went out and bought the first book I laid my hands on, which happened to be Gina Ford. Its not for everyone though and I am certainly not saying go out and buy it and it will change everything because thats not true, but there are some things in there which have really helped me understand M and structure a daytime so he sleeps better at night. So even if routine is not for you, here are my top tips taken from a measly 3 weeks of motherhood and GF:

• try and fit in as much feeding during the day (we get up at 7am as per GF)
• to do this you might want to wake Sophie to feed every 3 hours if she is asleep (maybe more as thats what she is already doing now?).
• don't let her fall asleep on the breast or have very short feeds as she will probs wake again soon wanting more - if needs be to keep M awake I blow on his face, stroke his cheek, tickle his feet or sometimes even take his nappy off and put a cold babywipe on his bits .
• don't let her sleep too much in the day (unless you feel she really needs it) If she is having a long stretch of sleep in the day (over 3 hours) or more than one 2-3 hour nap try and prevent this (by waking and stimulating / feeding) so that she has this long stretch at night.
• a bedtime routine is working well for us - bath then last feed in the dark so he learns its different to daytime feeds.

Hope this helps and doesn't sound too preachery! M's lungs have just opened so I am off to feed him some more.

The routines / ideas don't always work and as Daisy said don't put too much pressure on yourself.

Good luck!

Thank god ive had some responses, i was literally sitting here with tears streaming down my face begging her to stop crying as mummy has no idea what she is doing. Ive woken her every three hours in day for feed, i change her which wakes her then feed. She does fall asleep on breast and then i can lie her down but at night she wont fall asleep feeding and so just screams the house down or fusses. if i keep her on my chest all night she will grunt and whinge but not actually cry, if i lie her down in basket she goes ape shit again!!

We've started doing bathtime at 7pm followed by eve feed but at 11pm, the witching hour begins and the same feed routine etc just wont settle her. its pissing me off more as MIL is asking, whats her poo like, whats her wind like etc. She has milk running down her bloody face, she poos about 4 times a day, loads of wet nappies and no wind, just brings it up herself when upright. feeding is a dream she just wont sleep after it. im so despondant as i just cant help her unless i let her sit with a nipple next to her face!

I'm getting through a (lightweight) novel every four days at the minute as I read when bumba is feeding at night! One day I'll master lying down to feed and co-sleeping!

this time next week DW you'll be a pro

DW - hang in there it sounds as if you Lo is doing great with all the poo and wee and great that your milk is fine.
Mine after a full feed is also the same she won't settle - unless my boob is around- She is now crying in her chair and waiting to be held and cuddled so she can drop off - I also have the hate of the basket but she is getting used to it more and will do stints at night in it but the day time it is a loathing .
Ignore MIl and silly comments get her to do the cooking and washing while you rest - you do what is right for you I found the site mentioned by leaks a good one as I was on overload with info .
I did not get dd weighed today too much water again but its better than yesterday only a few big puddles so will try tom ...

DW if she is sucking for comfort have you tried a dummy. I loathe the things but we have bought one for M and it seems to settle him when he's not hungry but doesn't want to sleep. He just seems like a sucky baby and tbh whilst I hate dummies, having a crying baby who won't sleep is worse!!

Question has anyone else noticed their LO's head always goes to one side when sleeping / playing etc?? M's always goes to the left (his left). I only ask because I was reading about chiropody and cranial treatment and this could be a sign of needing some spinal / cranial work. Anyone know anything about this?? Thanks!

Hi Drswife

Sorry your feeling low, it will pass honest.

Do you swaddle Sophie or does she have a sleeping bag as I found this helps Rebecca, also what about trying the possibility of a dummy? I know they are not nice but we have given Rebecca one, I am with the whatever works camp.

If you would like to meet up I am near you I understand you can not drive at the minute but I could bring cake

Keep in touch. X

Rebecca seems to be getting me back for being good at night, she would always feed in this pattern 9.30, 2.30 and then 6.30 but now seems to be waking at 4ish s well and not wanting to settle it was going so well

My bruised boobie feels better so hopefully massaged away.

Wish I was closer to sheffield for meet up but I dare not drive 1 1/2 hours on my own!

Bumba finally had a decent feed, and after some nasty wind from his bottom end, and then another decent feed......is snoring away happily, in his crib upstairs!!!

We have the baby phone on, but I keep checking on him as I'm being a bit LBS about it. We're hoping that he will settle better without the distraction of the TV. Fingers crossed.

and if he's in the bedroom it gives me an excuse not to put the rest of the laundry away

I'm just putting some new photos on my profile....with his eyes open, no less!

DW huge hugs flying your way!! I have no advice as never bf but I have heard very good things about the Kellymom website which should help. Also, are the community MW's coming to see you or the independent MW that you had for your birth?? Maybe they can help a little?

I think Obs was right that perhaps the first-timers weren't prepared enough - although I am not sure that anything us second/third/fourth-timers could have said would have prepared them better - it is such a shock to the system that nothing can prepare you for it!!

DW Sophie loves you - of course you are doing the best you can and don't think otherwise! I hadn't realised you had a c-section - did I miss your birth announcement/story? Hope you are recovering ok aswell as you need to look after yourself as well as Sophie.

MW came and weighed Sam today - he has put on 100g so still not back to his birth weight at 12 days old. Still not discharged though as his cord has not dropped off which MW said is unusual for 12 days old so she is coming again next week just to check it has fallen off! Just spoken to my mum and apparently my cord wouldn't seperate and the doctors ended up burning it off - and burning my tummy in the meantime

well that didn't last. He is up again!!

Coolkat, def up for a meet up when im more on my feet. I'll do birth story for you ceebee when i have two seconds, it was a bloody marathon but at least ive tried most things in birth to know what works for me if theres a next time!! ha ha.

just had cranial sacral therapy done on spoh, woman came to the house took an hour and a half and thank god, she's actually settled and gone to sleep for the first time today. so i would say go for it, honestly nothing but nothing seems to settle sophie and this woman has laid hands on her for an hour without moving and its a miracle!!!!!!

In response to suggestions, we use grobag at night which seems to help in that less fussing when and if she does actually drop off, swaddling was good too but she poo's so much it was worse having to unravel her. dummy, i tried on the first night of hell. i cried and cried at her and gave her a dummy, she spat it straight into DHs face and then jabbed him in the eye!! PMSL..decision made, no dummy thanks mummy!

Looked at kellymom thanks daisy, that was reassuring. In laws dont even warrant discussion at this point, you all know how bad they were before the baby arrived let alone now! tonight i have decided that if she has a bad night, im putting her in the sling and putting the xmas tree up, that will stop me clock watching and give her something nice to look at at least!!

Good to hear you soundign a bit more chipper DW

Poor you with your PILs though. Just smile and nod meanwhile wishing her as far away as possible

DW the Christmas tree sounds like a plan Glad the cranial stuff worked and hopefully Sophie will settle for the evening!

Right, I have decided I am being punished for some misdemeanour in a previous life!! DS1 has had the same nap/bedtime routine for 12 months and NOW he decides to change it fgs!! He refused his nap over the weekend which was ok - but obviously DH forgot to tell nursery this morning, he has had a nap there and is now stood at the top of the stairgate rattling it refusing to go to bed.....grrrr!! He has always gone to bed so easily and happily yet he decides the time to be a pain in the a**e is when we have a newborn baby in the house

Evening all

Starting to feel twitchy - bedtime approaching... Had a good night last night but I think that was because he was so knackered from being up the night before.

Not much to tell really. Am bit hormonal, all seems very scary and strange and I wonder where I've gone and what will happen. Trying to go with the flow and not fret about the night times too much.

love to everyone and hope we all have a quiet night x

DW Sorry to hear you're having a hard time but it sounds like you're doing great with Sophie if she's feeding well and producing lots of dirty and wet nappies. Hang in there, it will hopefully get easier. In addition to what has already been recommended I would also suggest the book "What to expect - the first year" as I've found really helpful. It's US-focused but still very useful.
Choc in answer to your question about head position when lying down, I read that this is perfectly normal as babies do favour one particular side. I can't find the relevant passage atm but you could try alternating M's position so he's got different things to look at and changes his head position to avoid a flat head. A question re GF and napping in the sling - do you just put M in the sling when it's time for his nap? Will he sleep in his crib/cot during the day?
I'm still struggling to get Elise to settle anywhere other than on me or next to me at night. DH thinks I'm creating bad habits and would like me to persevere with putting her in her own bed - not easy when it's a toss-up between sleep and no sleep! Can anybody advise on this?
Hope babies settle down tonight and we all get a better night's sleep - better run, somebody is hungry!

ceebee...it's classic "look at me mummy" behaviour. He'll settle back to his routine soon.

glad the cranial osteo worked DW; it hasn't done a lot for Bumba unfortunately, although as DH said, who knows how bad he might have been without it

ChocO, worth a go with the CO. Ours definately helped with his neck stiffness, just not the digestive issues.

Lost my instruction book, why oh why will Rebecca not stop crying

Fed - Check - twice
Nappy - Check
Wind - Check
No Poo, how do you make them Poo?!

Its gonna be a long night for me, DH is at work, right now I wish I was . . .