Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Post-natal clubs

Join our Postnatal Clubs forum to find parenting advice for newborns.

Original poster

How long did your PND last?

16 replies

Aseagullatemybaby · 22/04/2022 14:17

Third baby (I have 3 very young children close in age) and never experienced PND before until now. I’m incredibly overwhelmed and feel very alone.

Ive referred myself for NHS talking therapy but that isn’t starting for another month.

What helped you through it?

Thanks for listening!

OP posts:
feellikemyselfagain · 13/05/2022 16:13

@Aseagullatemybaby
How are you doing? I also had PND but with my first baby so I know it must be so much harder for you with the other kids. I think everyone's journey is so totally different that people are reluctant to say how long it lasted for them and they don't want to give anyone any false hope because of how different every persons experience is. I searched and searched for recovery stories to see how long it took people to recover. All I can tell you is my experience so here it is:
It started quite early on for me and by about week 8-10 I was rapidly declining. Had a breakdown and was suffering with awful anxiety and insomnia. I didn't know I had PND or that sleep issues were a symptom but I've never felt anything like it. Absolute emotional rollercoaster. I had private counselling every week for about 6 months from this point but refused antidepressants. I got myself to a much better place mentally but was still suffering with a massive lack of sleep and anxiety. Eventually had another breakdown and decided to try medication. I was prescribed a fantastic antidepressant called mirtazapine that at a low dose of 15mg helps with sleep and that sparked the beginning of the end of it for me! I've been taking them for 5 months now and they've been the extra push I needed. I'm now back at work, my son loves nursery, and we're even currently having a loft conversion done! All things I never thought I'd say! So in total around 8 months for me. I still have a few anxieties (was never an anxious person before) but my counselling has been fantastic (I still have it now every couple of weeks to top me up). Different for everyone of course and some people don't need to take medication. I'll wean myself off them eventually but for now I'm so happy feeling like myself again and feeling more calm and stable. All the best to you x

Georgia324 · 01/07/2022 18:45

Hi, how are you doing @Aseagullatemybaby ? I’m still not out of my episode but at 10 months in, I’m much much better than I was. @feellikemyselfagain may I ask how you knew you were ready to return to work after so much trauma? I’m signed off at the moment but I know going back will be the last boost I need to get me feeling totally well.

feellikemyselfagain · 01/07/2022 22:24

@Aseagullatemybaby
Really good to hear things are getting there for you. I didn't really know I was ready to return to work but I wanted to try. I did a few KIT days spaced out over about three months which I found really stressful at first and I ended up having another but much shorter breakdown. But each time I did one (sometimes just a short meeting or a tiny piece of work to be completed at home) I found I could bounce back a little bit stronger than before. I knew after about three weeks after returning that it had been the right decision for me at the right time. I took holiday a few days a week to begin with so only worked 2-3 days a week and I agreed a 4 day part time contract with my employer. I have recently found out another colleague who went on maternity leave a few months after me had PND too. She also found coming back to work has helped push through the final stages of it. It's been really helpful hearing about how it was for her and I feel like I have a good support in her. Keep going, you're clearly a resilient person. All the best x

Seeleyboo · 01/07/2022 22:38

First time i suffered with PND was with mt 5th child. Still have it. She will be 6 in September.

Justgivemeamoment · 01/07/2022 22:45

So sorry you are experiencing this and well done for seeking for help.

I had PND with my second and I think at 9 months the fog started to fade. What probably helped was my first one started nursery so I finally had a little bit of time for myself and the baby.

I didn't realise what it was. I just thought I was broken and didn't love my baby (who now is an ADORABLE 4 year old I couldn't live without). Breaks my heart to think how much time I lost.

Original poster
Aseagullatemybaby · 30/07/2022 07:09

update;

Im still low 😔 counselling has done zero for me, we have no support system (no family
or friends to help) and I feel like im
drowning daily when DH is at work (he’s out the house 5:30/6am - 8pm).

Im devastated im still this poorly, breastfeeding still so not sure what medications I can take but in all honesty I’ve plodded through not mentioning a thing to anyone, my counsellor has been rubbish and not once mentioned the PND, just said she thinks it’s not PND more that my life is hard with no support and focussed on that.

DH is in work today and I woke up empty and annoyed after a shitty night with the 8mo, everything is hard and a chore, my children are beautiful little souls that deserve so much more.

OP posts:
Goingtogoinsane · 30/07/2022 07:13

SSRI’s are fine to take when breastfeeding
I took sertraline after struggling and losing myself for 10 months
i was on them for 10 months and then weaned off but I would be happy to go back on them if I felt I needed to. They saved me.

Original poster
Aseagullatemybaby · 30/07/2022 07:36

Thank you.

I’ve taken anxiety medication in the past and it meant I couldn’t orgasm, it really affected me (high sex drive and it’s really important to me), do SSRI’s do similar?

OP posts:
3amAndImStillAwake · 30/07/2022 08:01

Can you speak to your GP or health visitor and ask to be referred to the perinatal mental health team? I was referred to them about 8 weeks ago and they have various team members who can help with different things. I was also concerned about medication so they arranged for the pharmacist to ring me to go through all the options (I'm also breastfeeding), the potential side effects, what might be best for me regarding starting dose etc. And then the perinatal team wrote to my GP asking for it to be prescribed, which it was after a phone call appointment with them. I've spoken to the perinatal nursery nurse who has been helping me with bonding as I felt really disconnected from DD2. My referral was done as an urgent one and the perinatal team rang me the next day and someone came to my house to talk to me within about three days. She comes every week or two to see how I am, and what support I might need.
My health visitor also referred me to the charity home start and they run a local group for mums with PND. I'm on a list for when the next batch of sessions start so I'm hoping that will help me get out of the house a bit more.

I had PND after DD1 as well, but nowhere near as bad as now and it improved significantly when I went back to work. I never had any treatment for it that time.

SSRIs can cause issues with low libido and inability to orgasm in some people though, yes.

Georgia324 · 30/07/2022 08:59

A second vote here for the perinatal team. Google them and then ask to be referred to the specific team/doctor, with their phone number or email. You can’t be too pushy with the NHS. I have bipolar and my PND followed a period of hypomania after giving birth, so it lasted a long time, but having the right multi-disciplinary support was vital. Can your partner perhaps speak to his employer about the situation to see if he can change his working hours in the short term? I wish I’d asked my husband to be around more in my darkest hours (but for those I was admitted to a mother & baby unit!). Good luck.

feellikemyselfagain · 04/08/2022 21:47

Big yes to the perinatal mental health teams. Also PANDAS.org.uk for when you're feeling very low. They're free and wonderful. Your GP will be able to talk you through all the different meds you could take if you feel you want to go that route. They totally saved me. I'm still on them now and am so glad that they worked so well for me x

poochie9 · 30/10/2022 14:27

Hi @Aseagullatemybaby - I’m so sorry you’ve been suffering for this long. Can I ask, have things improved for you now?

im a ftm also lost in the depths of pnd x

Georgia324 · 30/10/2022 18:03

@poochie9 how are you feeling now? May I ask how old your baby is, and how long you’ve been unwell for? I’d like to help in any way I can. You will be okay, I promise.

poochie9 · 31/10/2022 10:29

@Georgia324 I’m not doing to good tbh. I feel so incredibly low and it’s robbing me of precious moments with my baby girl. She’s 8 weeks old. I feel like
it’s never going to end 😭 x

Georgia324 · 31/10/2022 11:09

I’m sorry :( It will get better! Did it start when she was born? The usual q’s but have you seen your GP/been referred for therapy/looked at PANDAS/found any support groups? X

poochie9 · 31/10/2022 11:18

@Georgia324 i think it started a few weeks before she was born. I was taking anti depressants for a panic disorder for two years. When I was around 7 months pregnant I started to ween myself off then because I felt so much better. However around 2 weeks after I took my last dose and 2 weeks before she was born, I started to decline again. I put it down to moving house.
for a few weeks after she was born I was making excuses for my low mood, a hard birth, the house move, lack of sleep. But then around 5 weeks I had a massive melt down and felt severely depressed and hopeless. I’d never experienced low mood like that before and it scared me. I spoke to my gp who basically just told me to go back on my anti depressants. Wasn’t offered any other help and she was really cold with me.
i waited a week and opened up to my health visitor who has put me in contact with the perimental health team. I should hear from them this week.
what did you find helped you? I hope you are starting to feel better now too.. x

New posts on this thread. Refresh page