How are you spending your maternity leave?

[Bunny2607]

Hi all
Just as the title says really….i’m wondering what everyone else is doing as i’m feeling sometimes like i should be doing “more”

Baby is 9 weeks, i had a c section so was out of action for the first 6 weeks i’d say, took me a while to feel better pain wise and had an infection etc. In between that baby was hospitalised at 3 weeks old for reflux and CMPA, i had baby blues at the start and then the weeks stay in hospital left me with PNA and i’m on sertraline now as i hit a real low although feeling loads better. Because of this its taken me til the last 2 weeks to actually start fully enjoying the baby and bonding.

I do have another son (6yo) who is at school too, he has autism so can be hard work.

I try and keep the house clean and tidy and washing upto date etc as I don’t like a messy house, and then we generally do 1 thing/outing a day whether its a playgroup or visiting family. My days are relaxed on one hand when i think back to when i was still working, but on the other hand I wouldn’t say mat leave is a constant meeting other mums/coffee and lunch dates etc and I’m wondering what other people do?

I do go out every day, but some days i’m happy chilling out, my husband works from home which i think is part of the reason. I guess life has just slowed down and it feels weird! On the other hand babies are full on. Mine is still feeding every 3 hours during day so i think to myself if i’m showered and baby is clean and dressed, house is upto date and we still manage to get out then that’s a massive achievement! I just don’t want to go back to September and feel like i wasted my time off.

Sorry for rambling on, but any input as to what other parents do with their time off is appreciated :-)

I try and keep the house clean and tidy and washing upto date etc as I don’t like a messy house, and then we generally do 1 thing/outing a day whether its a playgroup or visiting family. My days are relaxed on one hand when i think back to when i was still working, but on the other hand I wouldn’t say mat leave is a constant meeting other mums/coffee and lunch dates etc and I’m wondering what other people do?

Thank you for this post! I am 38 weeks now, and getting a bit anxious with all the 'I did not have time to shower for 6 months' posts.

Haha bless you. I must admit I don’t have time for a shower every day, but i definitely shower 5 days out of 7 minimum. I just put the baby in her bouncer chair in the bathroom with me, i think the noise of the water she likes suppose its abit sensory!

@Bunny2607

Haha bless you. I must admit I don’t have time for a shower every day, but i definitely shower 5 days out of 7 minimum. I just put the baby in her bouncer chair in the bathroom with me, i think the noise of the water she likes suppose its abit sensory!

This is exactly why I bought bouncer chair :D

Don't put any pressure on yourself to "do" anything. Mat leave is great for recovery, it took me 6 months to feel back to myself. I guess lockdown has some positives in that I couldn't go many places and no fomo!

Oops I hadn't finished. I meant to say just enjoy doing whatever you feel up to/ takes your fancy. I highly recommend national trusts with other mum friends if you have them.

My baby will be 9wks this week and I've felt the same as OP due to recovery and infection etc. I feel like I'm only just starting maternity leave properly but it's scary how much time has already gone by.

I have a toddler too and we don't seem to get tons done. We don't go out a lot and I don't know anyone else with kids. I seem to spend most of my time doing load after load of washing. I'm looking forward to the good weather though so when my DP is off work we can have a few days out.

Baby is 5 months and I have an older child at nursery/with grandparents 3 days a week.

House reasonably clean and tidy, everyone fed, and washing done.

On days when I have my preschooler we all go to playgroup in the morning and the park/the supermarket/the library in the afternoon. Weekends similar.

On one of the other three days I make plans for a small part of the day e.g. coffee, friend over, go to a baby class. Struggling to find a baby class that isn't awful tbh. The other days we spend mostly at home on the sofa, I do odd jobs and virtual yoga class and Wordle around the baby and we go for a walk.

We're not doing much but we are clean fed and happy. I sometimes think I should be doing more, but we're all shattered at bedtime!

By which long answer, I'm saying, i think it's fine not to be doing much! These are special days and i have fond memories of lie ins and sofa days with my eldest when he was a baby. And stressful memories of the baby classes we attempted. No regrets!

Hang out with your baby. Lie low for a bit. That’s what I am doing.

@Wazooks me too! Mostly feeding the whole time! He doesn't like being put down.

Apart from the odd local walk, due to needing to pump every two hours for cup feeds I didn't go anywhere for the first nine weeks. Once I was able to breastfeed I could then go for walks and to see family locally. It wasn't until baby was out of the fourth trimester that I started doing any baby groups or breastfeeding support socials etc as I loved the bubble and wanted to protect her from Covid in that vulnerable time too.

Don't put pressure on yourself! Congratulations on your baby!

I'm 38 weeks now and planning on doing nothing on Mat leave apart from keeping baby (and toddler) fed and not crying as much as possible
I'm not stressing about baby classes this time round
If I get time to tidy the house, then go me !! If not I can split it with DH once he returns home from work

Thank you all!
I’ve definitely relaxed into it this week, we have been seeing family and been to one baby group this morning then a big walk this afternoon. Trying to shift the baby weight haha. Its definitely about just doing what makes you happy rather than pressuring yourself or thinking you should be doing XYZ because thats what everyone else seems to be doing. I am enjoying the lazy days although i never stop haha its a break from work, as i know i’ll never get these days again and time really does fly.

I met friends, had long lunches, ate huge amounts of cake and went to things like baby massage and baby swimming, usually hang out with the other mums and dads afterwards.

I'd do some housework, and bake, and try to take a nap at some point if I was home.

I loved maternity leave.