Feeling guilty about newborn

[Peridotty]

Hi ladies

My baby is 4 weeks old! I feel really guilty I don’t interact with her more. I’m glad when she goes to sleep because I don’t know how to entertain her and I’m glad for the me time! For more information, I am exclusively breastfeeding her- it takes so much time- it feels like I’m on the sofa doing this for 14 hours a day. When I’m breastfeeding her, I either look at her and stroking her in silence or looking at my phone.
When she is awake, I give her tummy time and talk to her then and when she is generally alert then I will talk to her for a bit and bounce her, walk around the room pointing things out etc. I sing nursery rhymes to her but I feel embarrassed to do it in front of my husband. But I feel like I’m not talking to her enough or stimulating her. She doesn’t seem v interested in toys or things I rattle in front of her. I don’t really know how to stimulate her mind and worried she is bored. I like to put her in the swing as well and also play her classical music whilst I do my own thing. My husband does the same thing as me (minus the breastfeeding of course). We both feel a little awkward in terms of how to entertain our little one.

Oh my goodness, please don't feel guilty at all! You are doing everything she needs, holding her, feeding her and loving her. At 4 weeks they don't need anything else at all. Just enjoy the snuggles and watch Netflix/play on your phone/read guilt free! Soon she'll be interested in first toys, books etc but at this stage she just needs milk, sleep, cuddles and changing! Take care of yourself too and once she is a little older the interaction will come and be fun for you too as she soaks up the world. Enjoy those precious days they go so quickly! Xxx

Honestly OP, what you're doing sounds perfect for a 4 week old! Keep doing what you're doing and enjoy it! Remember also that you're still recovering from the physical ordeal your body has been through. Go easy on yourself. Little ones just want to eat, sleep and feel loved. You're nailing it on all counts.

4 weeks they don't need entertainment, they're in the grub stage and are pretty boring. Sounds like you're doing more than enough.

Fwiw breastfeeding is how I got into gaming. One of the few things you can do when you're tied to a seat with a baby. At least there are phones now.

What you are doing is plenty, honestly. Congratulations on your new arrival.

Don’t worry about it. My first wasn’t really interested in anything until he was about 1. If you feel that you have to entertain your baby, just sort of talk at them while you go about your business, keeping up a running commentary of everything you see and do, with exaggerated faces and gasps to make it seem interesting. Eventually they might start to respond a bit more. Otherwise just relax and enjoy quiet snuggly time while you can.

Please just enjoy any time to yourself while you get it and dont feel guilty as you will.be interacting for a lifetime so plenty of time yet! My first DC is a toddler now and I also have a baby and I wish I had been alot less hard on my self in the early months with my first! Pretty soon your baby will be a toddler and be like a little limpit on your leg and you wont even go.to the toilet in peace! Please enjoy this peaceful newborn phase and go easy on yourself as you will be recovering and wont be getting alot of sleep right now.

Sounds like you're doing great OP. Establishing breastfeeding is such hard work. She will be getting so much comfort and love from that. Don't worry too much about the singing etc, it will come. xx

Oh and they get very easily over stimulated at that age so less really is more.

Thank you for all the replies!
Will try to chill out a bit more and keep doing what I’m doing!

Hi OP, please don’t worry! I had twins so for the first 3 months I literally didn’t even have time to do anything more than feed them!! They don’t need anything more than food and naps at this stage, just enjoy it. You’ll soon be begging them to nap in the day and wondering why you didn’t make the most of this phase haha! Xx

What you're doing sounds great OP. As others have said, at this age, more than that isn't needed. Your baby just wants to be close to you. All the cuddles whilst breastfeeding will be perfect! Babies of your daughter's age are interested in your face more than absolutely anything. She wants to look at you and watch you talking to her. There is a reason newborn babies' vision is just enough to see your face from about the distance of your breasts! Try holding her in front of you, near your face and talk to her and make different expressions. She will watch you, fascinated, and try to copy your expressions. Stick your tongue out and watch her copy you. It's remarkable.
You're doing fabulously and you sound like a brilliant mum!