9 day old DS. Bored. Missing DD and DH. What do/did you do?

[AlexanderSalamander]

My DS is now 9 days old. I'm struggling with tiredness from lack of sleep and being anemic plus having insomnia when I do try to sleep. DS is sleeping in 2-3 hour stretches and I'm breastfeeding on demand. I also have blood clots in my leg from birth, so trying to strike a balance between keeping active and resting.

I also have a 2.5 y.o DD. My DH is off for 4 weeks with us; hes been amazing in picking up the housework, cooking and generally looking after my DD and myself. He's been taking DD out too so shes not been stuck inside and so I can get some rest with the baby, which I usually don't.
I'm feeling very detached from my DH and DD now and I miss them. Even when they're home, I feel like I'm on a different clock to them and I feel separated. I feel bored. I've not been out with our newborn yet and I dont think I can face it just yet. Not sure if it would make me feel better or worse.

What did you all do for the first few weeks? Anyone been in a similar position?x

Hi, firstly congratulations on the birth of your little boy. I’m sorry to hear you’ve had some complications! Just didn’t want to read and not say that I can really sympathise with what you’re feeling, my second little boy is 8 months now but when my DH brought our DS1 in to see him for the first time at the hospital and then they had to leave afterwards I felt like my whole world was upside down, and it took me a few weeks to readjust to the new order, of course I adored my baby boy but it felt like nothing was the same as before. But genuinely, I felt like a cpl of weeks later things settled and now I feel like me and my two los are the three musketeers most days. It’s not easy in the early days I know. Once you’re feeling up to it getting out to the park/ cafe/ walk around the shops all together you’ll def start to feel more human again. It’s brill that you’ve got somebody so supportive so def lean on that support, really do try to rest if you can and enjoy a little bit of alone time with baby too. X

Congrats💙I felt similarly, and didn’t venture out with my newborn for about a month. We both had had some complications too, and both were recovering from trauma and I was generally exhausted. It really helped me to get well and adjust by just keeping things really simple. Don’t feel pressured to join every baby class going relax at home, I watched more Netflix than I had ever watched before, and as I also had insomnia probs I read lots of books. Slowly I started to get out and about more with baby and my other kids. It took a while, but that’s ok. They early days are such a precious time and i relished every moment with him in the sofa. Call a friend for a chat or invite someone over, ( ask them to bring lunch) and even if you can’t sleep use the time when he sleeps to rest. Things will fall into place soon. My older kids barely remember the time I lived in pjs and baby is only 9months. You’ll get there. 💕🍀

Congratulations op.

I did Netflix. Had a csection so couldn't do much at all but Netflix helped get me through. I got through suits in the first few months.

Thank you all for your replies and reassurance. I had hoped ot would be a short time feeling this way. I think I put too much pressure on myself. I naively thought that baby would just fit in and we'd be having 4 weeks of fun as a new family of 4. You're right in that I should be enjoying these first few weeks, I love my new boy to bits but I cant help feeling like I want to close my eyes and wake up in a few months and have everything "back to normal". I am watching TV and Netflix but at the moment I feel like I'm just staring at it, not taking it in. Will probably improve over the next few weeks x

How are you doing now ?

@lifesbetteraftertea ahh thank you for asking!
My son is 1 month old now. I think you were totally right in what you said in your last message; it did only take a couple of weeks to get used to the adjustment. I think I've been lucky too as for the last couple of weeks, my boy has slept really well at night. He still has 2-3 hourly feeds through the night but he goes back down really well and is staying awake in the day longer. So I've been getting enough sleep without having to sleep in the day. DH went back to work this week so I've had the kids on my own, which I was really anxious about. It's been better than I expected though; no, I can't get much done in the house, but I get the necessities done - we're all fed, have clean clothes and we're happy haha!
So definitely feeling much better about things. I think I was still full of emotion and hormones at the point I made this post, and couldn't see past what was going on right then.
I want to say, your words that you and your boys feel like 'the three musketeers' has really resonated with me and I've thought about that often and it's really helped me to look at the day in a better light, so thank you :-) xxx