How do I do this?! Nap time with toddler and infant

[Bubblesoup]

I've got a 22 month old DD1 and an 8 week old DD2. I'm really struggling to cope with the nap time situation and it's making me feel like a failure!!

DD1 will only sleep in the car or buggy. She has never slept in her bed for a nap despite my efforts. Now DD2 is here it's causing problems. Today was such a disaster that it ended up with all three of us in tears! DD1 completely overtired because she'd had to wait, DD2 screaming with fear from the screams of big sister as I tried to get her in the car, and me because my stress levels are through the roof and I'm seriously lacking in sleep myself!!!

How do you juggle the different needs of two small children? I feel terrible that one of them is forced to accommodate the other!

Please be kind to me. I can't take criticism.

Hi bubblesoup, not sure I can offer much advice. I had a 2 year age gap between mine and to be honest the first 6 months are a complete blur! My oldest stopped napping all together at about 26/27 mths.
I would say try to work around the oldest as much as possible. Make sure they are fed/watered/changed before you do the same for baby. Maybe try same with sleep. If dd1 s nap is due pop them both in the car/buggy. Your dd2s routine will change so often going from 3-2-1 naps so don't fret about it. I used to feel I was just getting a routine going and would all change again!
Must admit dd1 started getting my iPhone/tv a fair bit putting her into zombie mode when I was trying to get dd2 settled
Didn't kill her and I lived (barely) to tell the tale.
Best of luck. Lack of sleep is a killer!
(Oh yes and if they both fall asleep in the car park up somewhere keep engine and air con going and get a cat nap yourself)

My 2 are 16 months apart and for me the first year was tricky but it went past very quickly! I agree with pp try to work around the oldest one, my DD1 would only sleep in the car or buggy during the day and I did struggle to fit everything in at the right times. Not much help really but wanted to say that you'll get through it and it will work out in the end!

Thank you for the replies and for the reassurance! I think lack of sleepis making me more anxious about it than i should be!

Interesting thar you say to work it around the older one. That's a good tip. Although today I hit a problem because my baby was sleeping very deeply and peacefully when I realised i should be doing DD1's nap. I knew that I'd have to do her nappy and that she was about 30 mins off a feed. So I really didn't know what to do! My instinct was not to wake a sleeping baby, although i know in reality babies have to fit around older siblings all the time. Especially with school etc. Anyway, I did wake her and gave her a feed and a nappy change before heading off for the nap. And she screamed and screamed! And my very overtired eldest really pushed my buttons, refusing to go along happily with any of it!! I had to physically restrain her in the car seat, holding her in place!!! I'm sure all my neighbours thought i was murdering them both!
We drove off down the road with all 3 of us in tears!!!!

Its so awful because i feel like I'm wishing away the babyhood of my youngest (when I enjoyed it so much with my first) but I'm really looking forward to when she's older!!
I always wanted at least 3 kids but now I'm really not so sure!!