December 2012 tantrums galore and they're not even two yet!

[SpottyTeacakes]

Hope everyone finds this and I haven't doubled up!

I've got really bad back pain and ds is spinning on his zebra crying. No idea why!

[halestone]

oh no Spotty, i really hopes she settles soon for you.

I am so tired today, feel like i could sleep for a week.

[halestone]

I couldn't be bothered filling the paddling pool up today so i brought H's baby bath downstairs. Her and my niece have had so much fun in it I will put pictures on fb later.

[SpottyTeacakes]

Just had to rush ds to the drs. He had a temp over 39 which is fine but twenty mins later he started vomiting and his eyes were rolling back then he passed out I was a bit panicked but dr reassured me. I'm not usually a neurotic mum

[halestone]

oh no Spotty, how is DS now? Did the Dr say what was wrong with him?

[SpottyTeacakes]

Dr thinks it's viral and he was vomiting because his temp went so high so quickly. He's ok now actually I feel like I massively overreacted but I was really worried for a minute! I have a febrile convulsion when I was a baby so I'm weary!

[MrsNutella]

Spotty I'm certain I would have done exactly the same thing! Better safe than sorry. Hope DS is ok and then you can relax this evening.

Yesterday and today the DCs have slept at the same time in the afternoon. It has been amazing. I've managed to tidy up our spare room a little bit and just having that time to myself has felt really good.

[halestone]

Spotty i also would have done the same thing but to A+E

Nutella well done for getting your DC on the same sleep schedule.

[SpottyTeacakes]

Thanks I made dd go out without any shoes on she didn't mind but I was really scared for a minute!

Nutella that sounds great, not quite the same, but I love it when dd's at school and ds is asleep. It seems like forever since I had time to myself at home!

[WLmum]

Scary spotty - I would have def been at the dr or a&e quick smart. Dd2 was v poorly and fitting at this age - we spent 3 days in hospital while they figured out what was wrong, including a lumbar puncture, poor thing. She always vomits with a high temp. Hope he's feeling better now - make sure he's getting some fluids.
I'm feeling your pain with dd and school, dd2 is fine about going to school but is crying and barring the door every day when I go to work. She said tonight she hates it because my working day is so long. Whilst I feel awful for her, I also feel a bit miffed that DH doesn't get this guilt trip and he works more hours than me. Guess they just love me more

[utopian99]

Gosh spotty that sounds scary! I'd have been terrified. Hope all is well now? I really feel for O when he's sick, it really bothers him I think.

Just back from a lovely relaxing holiday - 2 months left till the New Small arrives. Eek. So impressed with your coordinated sleeping Nutella, we can only hope. Not sure who said but yes his speech has suddenly come on loads, which is a relief. We're getting signs and words strung together too, which is cute.

Oh yes, and our lovely 'outstanding' childminder is retiring and moving in the first week of October! Argh. I don't want to give him yet another stranger to get used to just before the Small arrives, but I was thinking that having a bit of just baby time would be nice for it. Think we'll make do without that Monday though and just hang in for the nursery place which might not be till March. I'll still have Friday and Thursday..

[SpottyTeacakes]

Yes I'd probably leave it too utopian. Sad that someone you really like is retiring how dare she

WL that must make you feel really guilty! Dd is getting better no tears when I leave. I'm worried that she only plays with older girls at lunch but does have one friend already.

Ds is ok thanks. He's slept all night and woken with high temp still but generally seems ok.

[WLmum]

utopian if you've got 2 days covered I'd leave it too.
spotty I hope ds cools down and still feels ok. Yes, it does make me feel guilty - guilty about leaving her and guilty that I enjoy my job. I have to remind myself that just because she doesn't like it doesn't mean it isn't for the best - I'm happier working (Only 3 days) and we could not survive financially if I didn't, in the same way she might not like taking medicine, eating fruit instead if sweets etc. she's exhausted from school which is exacerbating her already sensitive nature. She was up twice in the night with 'bad dreams'. I'm also frustrated with never getting a full nights sleep and that all the emotional stuff is directed at me. It's not anyone's fault but still it irritates me. I'm using all my good will for the dds so I'm being quite tough on DH. I have explained and he does understand but I need to watch it.

[ddas]

Glad ds bit better spotty. Think most mums would have done the same. Better safe than sorry!

wlmum you are also giving your dd's a good female role model that if they want to go out and work they can & achieve whatever they want.

[SpottyTeacakes]

You definitely shouldn't feel guilty that you enjoy your job! I'm sure you're a much happier person/mum because of it. Ds is falling asleep on me for the first time in over a year. Amazing!

[ddas]

Happy mummy = happy kids

[PurplePidjin]

A working parent is a great role model, we all have to work (in whatever capacity) whether it's taking on most of the responsibility for the house so the other parent can work or both parents working outside the home and sharing the domestic chores. Far, far better to have a parent who works outside the home and is content than one stuck at home all day resenting it!

And I'm a SAHM (pretty much) remember, luckily it suits me and I still work evenings after R is in bed!

[MrsNutella]

Evening ladies.

Utopian great that O's speech has developed. Land ooohhhh not long now until you get to relive the sleepless nights, sick, endless feeding, endless screaming joy of a newborn how are you feeling?

DS kept running away from me today, he was laughing his little head off but he kept going further and further from the buggy and honestly, I sometimes wonder why I bother wasting my breath telling him to stop .

Actually, has anyone tried that? Saying nothing. I'm just thinking, that might work I'll try it out - obviously somewhere safe and not near a road or anything - and report back!

[Barbeasty]

WL I dread to think what DD will be like next week when I'm back at work, after I've been here for 2 weeks. She'll have DH but she's so tired too and we had a bit of a tantrum this afternoon about doing her homework.

A is very insistent about having his nappy changed when he's done a poo. He'll say "stink" more and more forcefully until he's changed.

[WLmum]

spotty that's nice to get a sleepy cuddle. Is he cooler now?
beasty that's funny!
I agree with you all but it's hard having to physically move a crying 4yo out the way so I can leave. I was a sahm for 2 years with dd1 which I loved (had a fat redundancy cheque to live off) but when the cheque got too skinny I took a low paid low skilled local job so I could be around as much as poss but over the years my brain (and bank balance) hurt and it's loving being exercised again.
nutella have you had a tough day? If you are somewhere safe, good idea to let ds run and see what he does. He'll probably come back to you soon enough once he realised you're not playing or wants a snack/drink/cuddle but maybe best to wait til DH is around just in case!

[PurplePidjin]

nut wave bye bye! r takes off across the park sometimes and that really confuses him

[utopian99]

Getting there Nutella! Half starting to get excited to meet him/her, half terrified of how much harder it'll be than when O was a newborn. I am looking forward to snoozy tiny baby feeds though.
Also on the running note definitely let him just go (somewhere safe!.) O shoots off at the drop of a hat but never disappears.

wl I'd back up the others - it's far better to have happy parents and strong intellectual role models than growing up to realise that you were a reason for them to feel they'd sacrificed their identity for you. My great grandmother gave up what was, for it's day, a fairly impressive career as a singer when my gm was born, and my gm has always been very aware of the fact. My mother always worked - not office stuff but not child-based work - and she was so much happier for it and it gave me a fantastic template for my own motherhood.
That being said, I sympathise with having to do anything which you feel causes sadness to those you love.

[Barbeasty]

To echo what others have said WL my mum gave up work when she had me. I was unplanned, or as she kindly put it a mistake.

She clearly resented not working, and I've inherited her constant worries about money.

I made the decision when I changed jobs a few months ago to go to 5 long days (actually the days aren't that long but commuting by train means I'm out of the house longer than I used to be), instead of the 4 days I used to do- which I could have flexed again to do the school pick - up every day.

I'm not going to resent my children (but don't get me wrong when if I win the lottery tonight my resignation letter would go in on Monday!)

[MrsNutella]

beasty and utopian thank you. I think I am, at times, on the brink of resenting my children. When actually it was my and DH's fault that the timing could have been better. But the points you make about making sure we have a balance for a happy mummy are very useful. Thank you.

DS is set to "mayhem" today. Can anyone recommend the best brand of earplugs/ear defenders/noise cancelling headphones....???

[WLmum]

What a wise bunch you are
nutella you doing ok? Fwiw I think every parent feels a bit of resentment now and then, even if it's only superficial. I guess it's about what you do with that feeling that counts.
For me, it's clouded by my mum being a single parent of 3 so always having to work really hard and full time when I know her ideal would have been to be a sahm. I feel bad for having choices she didn't have (and choosing differently) but I also remember how much I missed her and how sad I was being a proper latch key kid at 7 (same as as dd1), although I know that my dds always have a loving parent or gp in place if me.

[WLmum]

nutella teach him to play sleeping lions?