March 2013 - gurgles, giggles and going on holiday (for some of us at least!)

[pudtat]

Will this do? Never started a thread before so hope this works...

previous thread

leni there will come a time, eventually, when you have to go out and leave your man in charge of your baby for a day. What exactly is he planning to do if that day involves a bowel movement? Perhaps you should ask him, so he can work out a plan. Also, for the record, girl bits can be awkward to clean too. You're not allowed to go rooting around in the depths with a wet wipe, and the stuff gets everywhere.

plonko I must confess, I don't actually have any duct tape in the house. I just dream of its myriad uses... DD likes a similar shouting game, except it's more At Daddy than With Daddy.

So, the clinic was a waste of time. Got there twenty minutes after it started, and there were a dozen babies already waiting in a room that felt like a sauna. Bollocks to that, cos I don't really fancy sweating that much and possibly fainting. Rang the HV when I got home, she said try a different clinic Friday morning and if that's too hellish to contemplate she'll come round with her scales. Is very annoying though, the local clinic that's just closed down was lovely, never more than three people waiting even if you didn't get there first thing. Which is of course why they closed it - not enough people using it.

I've tried various shades of tight, sadly to no avail - today poo exploded out on to the rocker, I had to tie a muslin round him just to stop it dripping on the carpet

Hope mini Eig gets better soon. Weird how they smile as they're puking/pooing isn't it?

DS decided himself to go to bed an hour early, with no complaints, after two back to back dinners. Hoping this doesn't mean he wakes up at midnight...

Evening all,

I hope mini-Eig carries on smiling through the shite!

Leni I think you need to tackle the bits-cleaning issue! There's nothing rude or embarrassing about baby bits and maybe it'll just take a bit of covertly being left at poo changes for him to realise!

My DH has come home tonight very happy with his big sleep last night and offering all the help in the world tonight guilty much?

Madame has treated us to a poo tonight finally after 13 days! I've never been so pleased to see a sludge filled nappy!

Stormy we also had a crappy clinic today. They did manage to successfully weigh her but I'd gone to ask them if they thought she had a tongue tie (GP at 6 weeks was very non-committal & I now think she has). She had a look and then explained that she's never sure about tongue ties and I'd be better asking someone else! Excellent!!!

She went down well over an hour ago and I'm celebrating by staying up and watching some TV. I think this may be an error!!

Aaaaand we're up. 2am - earliest since week 3.

I've lost the ability to sleep on command, especially since my face is melting off in this heat!

It's official, we now have no routine whatsoever, apart from that DS only does poonami when I'm the only one awake

Is it just me, or does it seem as if there needs to be a bit more expertise in diagnosing tongue ties amongst these 'professionals' who are meant to be responsible for babies' welfare?

Hi Leni

I completely agree, I don't understand how they ont know about it when it can have such a significant impact & is so easy to treat.

We've finally stretched back to 3am for first feed but there's been whingey sounds occasionally since 1 so I've been waking up every 20 mins since expecting a full waking. Typical!

Morning ladies! Unusually rubbish bedtime here, took well over an hour and moving him from his Moses basket to his cot to get him settled, plus a bonus bottle feed. Mind you it is tres hot here... That pushed back dream feed and stupidly gave me excuse to watch the apprentice though recorded to didn't get to bed til gone 11pm so we are a little later than usual here, but not much.

Mind you, did get my 12 week wonder week email on Monday so maybe that explains things!

Honestly cannot see how anyone could not want to get their LO clean when they cannot do it for themselves and to not would leave them open to soreness and indeed infection. Don't take this the wrong way Leni, and I know we all have our foibles, but your OH seems to have more than most! Besides, I'd have thought it was easier dealing with boy bits as that's what he's used to.

Well - I don't know what to tell you. Madam went to sleep at 8.10 last night. I gave her calpol as she'd been really screamy and full of cold earlier. She was active in her sleep at about 6am but I had to wake her up now to feed her, as she last fed at 7.30pm. Does calpol have sedation properties? Am I going to have to give it to her every night now so she sleeps well? I'm a bit worried but, as I got roughly 8 hours sleep myself, I am secretly happy

Any, if it does have sedative properties they don't work here... It's just paracetamol so I would guess not.

I think my OH has this paranoia that he shouldn't be touching DS's bits, it's not laziness. He's an odd chap sometimes - quite anxious a lot of the time. Often I have to make wild ultimatums before he'll actually talk about why he does certain things, which isn't ideal, but considering my past relationship experiences I'm just happier to be with someone who works hard and isn't a complete nightmare. I probably portray him in a poorer light here because it's cathartic and I know you all understand. Although sometimes I think perhaps our issues are so ridiculous that we're the only ones having them

No sedation in calpol as far as I know, but I guess if she's poorly, and you take away anything that might stop sleep with calpol (pain and temperature) then she's sleeping it off?

After a couple of rubbish (wonder week?) nights, dd was back to usual routine of bed at 7, dream feed at 10, waking to feed at 4.30 then going through til 7. She then had a play and another feed...and has been napping since 8... This is unheard of. So much so that I keep going to check she's still alive. Is it too much to hope that she's learning how to nap? Actually, naps have in general been longer all week. This may be because of the Suffolk sea air or the very busy days, or the fact that mummy is having at least one pint of adnams every day but i think its because of the 'poddle pod' we have bought for her to sleep on. I urge you all to google, it's brilliant!

The poddle pod looks very cool vj - whatever gets the LOs to sleep is a bonus!
Leni - maybe your OH is still afraid of manhandling (ahem) him and just needs more practice. I know mine does as he takes about half an hour to change DD and uses half a pack of wipes (for a wet nappy!), so I think he's being over cautious!

Well for 2 days we have had odd naps and night sleeps. Afternoon naps have turned to over 3hrs. Night before he slept from 11-5.30. Last night was from 10-4:30. But he was wide awake and wanted to play agghh. Now considering he has slept longer recently why the heck am i so tired.

I swear Calpol has sedative qualities. I gave DS a bit earlier because he was extra crabby (those little teeth look like they're getting nearer the surface) and he's slept a lot. Off his food a bit too, which is quite unlike him, as anyone who's seen his thighs will testify.

Poddle Pod looks awesome! So getting one of those for Plonkina no.2. What a brilliant idea.

KF That sucks. Any chance it's the dreaded 4 month sleep regression?

Right ladies, I need your help. I was absentmindedly job hunting earlier - well, more of a gander than a hunt I suppose. I went onto the website of a local university and they have a post that sounds pretty good. Great salary, I'm pretty well qualified and reasonably experienced for the role, it's only 2.5 days a week so would work really well for what I need. And I'd bring home around 4k more than if I were to go back to my current role. The only snag is that it'd start in JULY! DS would be nearly five months old. Is this too young? I know even getting an interview is unlikely as these low-level professional jobs are hugely sought after. The pay is, frankly, ridic, and seeing as we're trying to save for a wedding/house deposit it feels like a no-brainer and I should apply regardless. My real question, I guess, is this : is it socially acceptable to return to work when your baby is not yet 5 months old?

First one to wins a prize.

plonko im not even sure when this sleep regression began as he is usually a rubbish sleeper.

I think you should apply regardless. You may get an interview you may not. If you are offered the position then you can think if you want to return to work. Only you can make that decision. It all depends on whether you really want to work now and how much you want to change your current job. Would you have to work at your old job for a certain period before you give in your notice?

Might as well apply, plonko. You're right that there'll be a lot of competition, but you don't lose anything by applying, do you? And you never know, you might be offered it, at which point you can think about whether leaving DS to go back to work is what you want to do. Bugger what's socially acceptable though - whatever works for you and your family is fine, whatever anyone else thinks.

I'm wondering if we have impending teeth here. Fartypants has been grumpy, shouty, extra dribbly, and very nap resistant for a few days. And her gums look really lumpy. She's currently sleeping in my bed next to the man, though it took her over an hour to stop spitting the dummy out and immediately demanding it back. It's a bugger when the nap schedule goes to hell like this. She's supposed to be awake and playing now, and getting in the bath in half an hour. No idea if that's going to happen...

There must be something in it plonko or it just had magical properties.
And you should apply for the job - all new recruits get a probation period so if you found it was too soon, you could probably get out easily.

Apply Plonko. Cross the decision bridge as and when you have to. But as overall it sounds like it'd suit you perfectly, what would be better for DS longer term? Happy mummy and good work life family balance or an extra month or two of you at home now and then poss even going back full time?

I will be returning ft in sept when DS will be 6 months. Admittedly I will be leaving him at home with his dad when I do, but even so. I think you have to do what's right for your family.

Good luck!

plonko I am currently reading Lean In and I say do it. Completely a good idea. Less hours for more pay means more overall time with little one and more cash equsls happy parents. Also 5 months is before separation anxiety sets in so easier than leaving an 8 month old plus on the baby.

I know I may get shot down and of course there are counter arguments but my opinion given I am on number 2 is going back to a job you want to do with hours that mean you still spend 4.5 days and all nights with the baby is a great gig and you should LEAP at the chance.

Ps I am in super excited mode as mini eig had a 3 ounce bottle from me with no arguments pre bath!

I'm gonna do it. Just spoken to DP about it and he thinks it's far too early as DS is fast becoming a Velcro baby, but I agree strongly with what you said Eig - it'll be easier now than when he's 8 months old. You've all made excellent points. Thankfully my sister and her bloke both work for major universities and can help me a lot with my application.

How was returning to work, Eig? Great news on the LO's bottle btw, how's the recovery? I think it'll be difficult at first but I'm really eager to get my own 'headspace' back iykwim. It'd be a complete joy not to have to work evenings and weekends (I shit you not, my old job had me working 100 hours straight in order to get a long weekend - I cannot will not go back to that).

Stormy get that Calpol out. It's magical. I promise.

Do it Plonko - give yourself the chance at least to decide! The babies I was nanny to for a summer had been with nannies from 12 weeks old and they were still beautiful well balanced children who absolutely worshipped mummy

I'm kind of in a similar position. I started trying to sort out my showreel today, including recording guitar - no easy feat when DS is only happy when he can see faces. I'm feeling a bit boxed in lately, too much time doing the same routine over and over on my own... I feel horribly guilty for wanting to hand DS over to OH for longer so I can stop my music career grinding to a complete halt. I had resigned myself to putting it on hiatus anyway but every time I do (it's happened a few times!) something comes along to gee me up again. This time I have to do more vocals for the band I'm in with one of the guys from Groove Armada - working with him's such an honour so I know I have to do it. My publisher seems back on track and keen to push me to directors for film scores and video games, which if I got any would pay a year's wages from one job.

The pooey bits thing with OH - he thinks touching DS's willy will make him a child molester... What a numpty

YY to feeling boxed in Leni. I live DS to pieces but I'm not made to be a SAHM. I went to a childminder from 12 weeks old and started school at 3 and I'm fine twitches

I guess I didn't get a masters degree and do a grad scheme only to chuck my professional life down the crapper cos I had a baby. I took mat leave so early I've actually already been off work for nearly six months!

Gah - it's been a day and a half today (so v. grateful for full night's sleep last night). Baby sensory (rock and roll week - I dislike the shrill woman who runs it but DD loves it. I would.advise it as a career as at £5 a time and 20 babies in the class, she's laughing all the way to her next session) then third jabs, all thrown into the mix with her wretched cold (which is producing dangerous amounts of snot) and she's been screaming all evening with only a half hour nap in the last 7 hours. Bathed her, administered the sedative calpol and on last feed before bed now. Pleeeeeeease let her sleep like the proverbial

plonko honestly babies are fine to be left that early. When I had dd1/2 mat leave was only 3-4 months anyway. I've applied for one starting in August although I've not heard anything and it closed 2 weeks ago tomorrow.

Yep ood completely agree. It was tough going back to work and I would be lying if I didn't say I had days when I wish I was at home but it's not easy either way. There was an interesting study that said 10 per cent of women long to be SAHM, 10 per cent long to go back to work ... These two groups get it easy. The other whooping 80 per cent of us struggle, if we give it all up to be there every second we wish we had a job and if we have a job we sometimes wish we were home! I fall in that category but the cash from my job gives me and my children everything they need and me some social and professional furfillment. DS has had a nanny since 9 months old. He adores her but he loves me and I make a huge effort to be there for every big thing and I make all the decisions etc.. He is even proud of my working and office. I can't say if it will always work but you can always change your mind and quitting a job is much easier than finding one if you step off the employment track completely for some time. I found saying I'll go back for 6 months and if I hate it quit easier then thinking of it as an all or nothing decision ...

plonko sounds like we're unanimous in our encouragement. I'd say it sounds like a great opportunity. I sound a bit soft when I say it but I always think that in situations like this go for it and if it's meant to be then it'll happen. If not this one then something else exciting around the corner. Get that advice from family in the know and go impress!
Turns out single parenthood (dh on day 3 of 9 working in Spain) doesn't suit me and that I'm a total wimp! I have been keeping up with your news but found no time to comment. Those of you with oh who work away respect to youg it's the mental burden that's hardest for me. Knowing you can't share trouble shooting. Dd had awful day on weds. Worst since week five ish. Sods law! But was a delight yesterday. I think like with some of you the hot weather was a factor. And poss being away from home. We're at grandpa/sister's house. Sister and I are trying to sort though mum's stuff so don't suppose that's adding to the fun factor. Yesterday's highlight was finding a mug I'd made for mum at one of those pottery places. I'd written on it 'a hug from my mum makes everything better' which set me off...and made me think about my own precious relationship with dd. Funny old times. On the plus side there are eleven pairs of house Martins nesting in the eaves of the house and with some much glass in the house you constantly see them coming and going. Lovely. And being here for 'normal' days with nieces is nice. Having breakfast with them. Helping with homework. Hearing about their days. :-)
Going to try sleep to the frankly now tedious soft sound of ewan the dream sheep. It's Friday ladies! Whoop! What have you all in store for the weekend?