Afternoon ladies! I'm a new woman today! DP has sufficiently recovered to allow me to sleep. Til 2pm. 
. Feel slightly guilty, but then I did all the night feeds last night, and he did the school run this morning, then took Oscar downstairs at 9.30. And I only got to sleep at 2am, so I feel less bad. However I am quite sure I will struggle to sleep tonight, so have dispatched him for some Nytol (he is doing the afternoon school run, as he is quite keen to get out the house 
).
Am on the laptop yippeeee, so will try and get catching up and replying properly!!
Evil Your DP has not yet apologised. Yes he is tired, and not well, and tooth pain is particularly awful, I've had it enough, and been hospitalised with it. But life with children does not stop. It does not excuse in any way what he said. He has got a hell of a lot of making up to do, and apologising. I hope he has text you by now. I know that feeling of sending an ultimatum type text and then getting no response with in an acceptable time frame (ie. 2 minutes!!). I am sure I have thought many horrible things in moments of sleep deprivation, and probably said some nasty things along the way, but not to the point of wishing my partner and child dead!!!! I do remember telling DP I didn't love him, which is a horrible thing to say, but I was at the end of my tether, and I did apologise for it, and did not mean it. He knew I did not. He knew I was just being a hormonal irrational cow. So people do say horrible things in the heat of the moment, but that seems so unforgivable - but of course, we do forgive (if not forget) don't we. Because we want to keep our family together. I think some men (and women, not to be sexist!) play on that... Remember, keep chatting on here, get your feelings out. There is a lot of good advice and sympathy to be had. I wish I had this when I had my first DS.
Ok, so Oscar is now awake. Will keep going. He is watching top gear, hiding behind the sheet he is wrapped in, as if it is frightening him. If it keeps him quiet for a minute....!
It didn't, now feeding. One hand typing is so slow. Just put him up to size 2 teats. He is 7 weeks today, started going back to 3 hr feeds and taking 2-3 oz, then maybe 1-2 full bottles out of 8. Figured might be slow teats. This is first attempt with them. He accidently had one at 3 weeks old as Dp didn't know there were different sizes. He struggled that whole feed, then vommed the entire thing back! Seems okay this time! He always fussed a bit with some feeds, latching on and off the teat (same as he did when breastfeeding) so it was hard to tell when to switch up, as I really didn't want a repeat of the vom incident!
Candy I am opening myself up a little here. I spent 10 years going over and over DS1's birth. It was an emergency c/s for failed ventouse. I had so many questions. Doing my midwifery training obviously helped my understanding. I did 'get over it' to a large extent, but it took about 6/7 years. I did however feel that I would never fully accept it until I had been through labour again. This is my irrational brain at work.
Now, in retrospect, I can honestly say, I feel like it doesn't matter how I have given birth. I have suffered complications through both ways. Neither was better than the other. I now think 'whatever' when I think about future births. Did you think I would ever say that, considering how adamant I was for a home birth? I'm over it all now. I've no aspirations to go through a vaginal birth again. Same as I have no aspirations to have a c/s either. I will chose the best way at the time, if it ever happens again. Birth is the culmination of pregnancy, to get the end result. It should be as safe as possible, and should be what the woman wants - whatever it is she does want.
What I am trying, unsuccessfully (!) to say here is, please don't do what I did - and spend years and years wondering, going over it, and all the 'what ifs'. When it comes down to it, as long as you have been safe, you and baby are well, and have recovered, then that is the best birth experience, however that happened. I hope this makes sense, in my clumsy way. It is hard to put things in words, as I don't wish to say the wrong thing.
Pikz You are bloody wonder woman! I can't find time to wash my hair, or take a dump, let alone express 8-10 times a frigging day! I stopped breastfeeding when I realised that it was affecting my bond with Oscar. I was dreading feeding him. Dreading every whimper in case he needed feeding. At first I loved it, felt it helped us bond. But it quickly changed during the second week, when I felt breastfeeding was affecting our family, and most of all, DS1. I did not breastfeed him - so having bottlefed before, I felt far less 'guilt' at stopping. I did cry for 2 days over the decision though. I felt guilt because I could breastfeed, but I did not want to spend over an hour breastfeeding each time, when I had already tried a bottle (both EBM and formula) and he was so much quicker with it. I gave it 3 weeks, but he did not get any more efficient at breastfeeding, and the 6 week 'marker' seemed to be a lifetime away. Now he is 7 weeks, I feel like I made the right decision for me. He could not have been exclusively breastfed longer than 5 months, I would of had to and start introudcing formula before that point anyway. I would not of had the time to express, and work full time when he was 5 months. Some people probably could do it, but for me, I would have struggled so much. Expressing at work would have been pretty impossible for me (how ironic huh!). I decided that I can't do it all, so should make the best of what I can do, and that works for me.
For me, if he was my first child, and I had 12 months off work, I would have carried on, with a bottle of ebm, or formula as the last feed at night (by DP) to allow me to get some rest.
If I have another baby, I would breastfeed again. If it fits in with us all, then perfect. If it does not, I would stop. We are all different. Different things suit different families. Yes, breastmilk is the 'gold standard', but no one is perfect, and no one can predict what hurdles will be thrown in their way. We all have to make 'compromises' in every area of life, and this is one of them. I wish my DS1 was not from a 'broken home', but he is. I spent an extra 3 years of my life with a man who eventually made me extremely unhappy, just to try and make things work, so my son would have a happy home. It wasn't worth it. I should have left sooner.
Do you see where I am coming from? Sometimes we just have to do what is right for us, even if it seems the wrong thing, it is not wrong if it is right for you!
Rowing Sorry DH is being a prick. It seems many of our other halves have caught the Twatitis that is going around. Very infectious it seems....
You made his breakfast??! My DS1 doesn't even get his breakfast made for him!! Let alone DP! He doesn't know how lucky he is!
BigPig (I love your name!) I suspect your DP is trying to support you in a cack handed way. Mine did the same, but I felt he was undermining me at the time. I asked screamed at him not to, as I knew what I was doing, and he listened and stopped. Tell your DP you will tell him if you wish to change your current feeding method, as currently you are the one doing all the work, so it is your decision to make. I don't think they realise what an emotive thing it is.
Also, my baby is the only person in the world who loves my singing! He is enthralled by it! It won't last. DS1 hates my singing 'IT'S SO EMBARRASSING MUM'!!! Singing and dancing around with Oscar is one of his favourite things to do!
Glenda 10 year old boy who is exactly the same - my sympathies! I don't know what I need to do to kick him up the arse....! However he is fantastic with his little brother when I am here, but the complete opposite when he is with DP! so I try to look at his good points?!!!
Blonder I might have missed, but has he been referred to a specialist regarding his weight? He is gaining, so this is extremely positive. There could be many reasons why his weight is not following the centiles, but that should be looked in to by paediatrics surely? For what it is worth, as a mum, I think I would do what you are, and try formula, if only to show that it does not make a difference to his weight gain. If it does make a difference, then great, just carry on with both. If not, drop it and continue bf. It is a tricky thing to balance, isn't it?!
Just saw your subsequent post... I know nothing said in fake italian/american mafia accent! Or at least now I have a baby draining my brain, I don't! These little things really do suck every last ounce out of you -literally in some cases--.
PR I got up to page 7 of that thread, before giving up, as it was 35 pages long!!! I did see one of your first posts on there though! I would have posted, but it would have been a waste of my fingers and time! For what it is worth, my view is that formula companies should not advertise, but that the information should be freely available to all on request. My decision on which formula to feed Oscar was purely on cost. Because they are all the same. If it did not suit him, I would have tried the next one up so to speak. Some formulas suit different babies, but they are all the same thing due to regulation of ingredients. No one formula is better than another. Both my babies have had different formula, because they are different babies and they don't make Farleys any more!! My gip with the companies advertisements are that they claim to be better than another brand, they are not!
But I can easily see how BF can contribute to PND. Very easily see... some people are just just self centered twats who can not see that we are all individual and going through individual experiences, and you can not say that someone elses experience is wrong! It is their experience, their feelings! That is why I am so glad we have this thread! It is just so supportive! We should rename ourselves November 12 mummies: No twats present!
Fuck a duck. That was a long post that took me over 2 hours to do. Sorry .