FEB 2010 Terrors sometimes, angels at others - yep, they're properly two now...

[InmaculadaConcepcion]

New thread!!

Oh IC sending you lots of birthing vibs and hoping that Jesus decides to come out

Yes, good luck IC. A couple of years ago, one of my friends was wavering about whether to have an elective C section with her DC3 (she had had CS for her previous two). As a way of balancing all the wonderful stories some of my friends were recounting about how amazing labout was, I piped up with "It really bloody hurts, you know".

What I'm trying to say (clumsily) is that whichever way your DS comes out is fine. Don't feel bad whichever way it goes.

Another friend of mine asked for advice and tips when his wife was about to have their first child. I proffered one tip - take millions of photos. The other thing was: "You will never ever believe that one tiny person can turn your life so completely upside down, or that your heart will burst with love in a way you had never imagined possible."

I have a RL friend who is booked in for her CS in less than two weeks and I saw her yesterday. Thinking about her and you has made me all sentimental and nostalgic

Aw, Science bless you!

Yes, one thing DD's birth taught me was to have no raised expectations about the type of birth so I'm certainly trying to stay philosophical about the possibility of having another CS.

The reason I can't help feeling a bit glum about the prospect of ELCS however, is purely practical - DH will be back at work at the beginning of Sept, my in-laws will be re-opening their nursery (although FIL should be reasonably available) and SIL is opening a new shop early in Sept - and my own DM won't be coming until the 12th (although she has said she will come earlier if I need her to, bless her...) so the prospect of managing CS recovery with a newborn (not difficult) and DD (that's the tricky part) without as much support as I would have liked is rather daunting.

DD has new books and DVDs at the ready - I suspect the computer screen will become my friend. Thank goodness she's a relatively sedentary child!!

ic won't your dh have a couple of weeks of paternity leave? Surely that will take you to your mum coming down to give you a hand? I can see your concerns about coping with a cs, a newborn and a toddler, but I think you will be amazed at how well you manage. Anyway, the first days are always a haze so it will fly by

Another reason I am feeling so nostalgic is that the rl friend who is about to have her baby was pregnant at the same time as me with our dc2s. I hasten to add that I am not broody in any way

The DDs are at my ILs for a sleepover so I am having a lie in. This means I am gathering my energy so I can listen later to exactly why my mil thought it was ok to pull out dd1's first wobbly tooth yesterday . Yes, pull out not fall out

no he won't science i believe

at your MIL

I am 99% sure there won't be a third here

No third here either

No third here either. I may waver in a few years when the horror has receded but DH is staunch. Good, one of us needs to be. Two is plenty

Busy busy here with kitchen progress.

Hope Jesus makes a break for it soon, IC.
A jar of marrow jam (ignore the fact that it hasn't set, it's my first attempt) for everyone else.

DH is the weak one here, then again it's not like I planned the second. A small part of me regrets having DS but I think in time that will go. Also when I remember that he gave a reason to leave my job then I remember there were many good things to his arrival time. Just sometimes feels like life would be so much easier with one child but grass is always greener and all that.

Have a third cp and two will seem a doddle

CP seem to remember your dd wasn't exactly planned either and see how well she has turned out .

I would have a third but dh won't due to us being rather old . Finance and logistics of having three also put us off, as does total lack of family. Never thought it would be so hard to bring up children without family around...

dd2 is puzzling me at the moment. She's been to nursery three days this week and has had no accident there (I'd packed four changes of clothes just in case ). dh was in charge Tuesday and yesterday and once he'd picked her up mid afternoon she was like a dog at home, weeing on every corner (well, sofa, chair, floor...). She did that both days and he got so frustrated he put a nappy on her - total no-no as far as potty training is concerned but I can see why he did it and did not criticise him. Today I have picked her up and have made it quite clear to her that we have a potty to use downstairs (no downstairs loo) and a toilet upstairs and that I expect her to use it please. Just wonder what goes through her mind sometimes. Will report back how the next two hours go...

nk we're having a few accidents with dd2 too, nothing major but the odd slightly damp knickers. I'm finding a reward chart quite effective at helping to sort it out. Dd1 never did this, she would either be dry or let a whole wee go on the odd occasion she had an accident.

Good luck!

SR I've got exactly the same in that dd1 was like your dd1 . May try a reward chart on her... She's been fine so far but I am watching her like a hawk. dh was not impressed to have to strip and wash the sofa covers where she'd marked her place, so I'd rather not have a repeat!

DD lets a little dribble out first a few times, so I have change her knickers but not her trousers. As I've said before she still has at least one full accident a week, normally related to her not wanting to leave an activity but she will always poo in the toilet (now I've jinxed that).

that is true with DD. Maybe you other ladies with two can help me. I feel that I knew DDs personality really early on but I don't with DS. I don't know if it's just that he is himself and different to DD, because he requires a fair amount of input to not even get to a really content stage or because he's the second and therefore I am pulled in more directions so don't pay as much attention as I did with DD? (sorry turning this into a DS discussion).

I feel better that nursery have picked up the same things I had so it's not in my head (i) he loves being outside and (ii) gets bored really quickly. He has lately got the stage already of arching his back so it's hard to put him buggy/sling/carseat. He did however go every three hours last night which made a difference to how I felt today believe it or not.

Sadly, DH hasn't been at his new job long enough to be entitled to paternity leave, Science. But I believe he would be entitled to ask for Carer's Leave (or something of that nature) if he/I needed it. We shall see..!

Two's enough for me! At my age (even more ancient than NK ) I'd be really pushing it to go for a third.
Although my DSis (mother of four) says the jump from one to two is the biggest leap - after that it's just a case of adding another baby (!)

CP I think it's often the case that we connect differently with different DC - mainly because of personality, I suspect. Some you "get" easily, others not so much, although it makes no difference to the amount of love you feel for them.

So I can't comment about wanting a 3rd one as we're ttc number 2.

DS now asked for the toilets if he needs to use them and fx has not had an accident in the last 2 weeks (push away the mn jinx). He is asking every day to go to the swimming pool and has he doesn't have any concept of time it make things difficult!

NK odd behaviour from your DD2, hopefully she'll improve

IC I think you could have a third if you wanted because your dh is younger. Mine's 8 years older than me so both of us are a little on the old side.
Hope you're feeling okay and hoping things will start off on its own . Spoke to someone with twins in Germany who said that although she had an ELCS they tend to induce labour first a few hours before the ELCS to give the baby a chance to prepare for being born, rather than just pull them out without warning. Thought that was an interesting approach to CS.

CP What IC said . I still have to remind myself not to compare my two, and they are both girls. Speaking to some friends who have both girls and boys they all say that never mind stereotyping, boys are often very different to girls. One friend who had a boy first and then a girl kept complaining that her girl doesn't seem to be into anything, until I corrected her and told her that her girl WAS into everything and just different to her brother (who was very much into cars and little else). I think we really have to remind ourselves all the time that each child is an individual and siblings can be surprisingly different.

Well, dd2 was fine before bedtime and had no accidents, which makes me wonder whether her 'dog behaviour' was a kind of protest about me going to work? Well, she'd better get used to it!
I did call her bluff as well at bedtime when she tried to play for extra time by saying she needed a wee/ poo and I didn't believe her (she'd just been). Cruel mummy

thanks. I think I am so worried about him being treated differently due to the ILs that I am a bit sensitive that combined with the fact that DD was/is such a physically mobile person that side of her can't help but be evident.

DD has her odd accidents because I think I tread the line more towards her going by herself rather than prompting, if she is prompted throughout the day then she is fine. I just need to remember to prompt her more when we do certain things especially unusual ones.

it's fair to say we are extra cautious after DTD nowadays and I have heaps of pg tests

DH has had his comeuppance over his solo laundry. Although I hung it out to dry on Monday (only so I could put another load on) I refused to put it away. Told DH he had to do it and then made the discovery that it wasn't actually clean. Eejit had forgotten to put any washing liquid in! I have washed it again and just put it out to dry and now it's raining. Methinks karma is at play

I'm so petty

i didn't say anything in case he had a whole load of his in a basket/case and just chucked it all in the washing machine. Not making excuses but there was possibly a reason for this act. Glad he had some comeuppance though

Scones sounds like we all have our balls to juggle, just they are different ones for each of us.

Side effect of working again is that I regularly fall asleep while having a conversation with dh anytime after 9 pm . He doesn't think it's half as funny as I do (but I suspect he may have had 'other plans' which I keep spoiling ).

SR