IS THERE A SEPT 2005 CLUB YET?

[pooka]

Hi all fellow September mums. If I'm duplicating another thread please tell me. If not, would love to hear how everyone is getting on.
Tom is a week old today. All well - though has a slightly infected cord stump so am going to GP today.
I'm still madly hormonal, could burst into tears whenever I think about the impact all this has on my lovely dd (2y2m).

STM congrats on Noah's birth (at last!). Glad you are sounding up-beat, even though it sounds a bit scary!

Bubbles - sorry you had such a bad time with Mia's birth. As for the "rush of love" - neither dh nor I felt it with ds (there was also quite a bit of stress surrounding his birth). But as we got to know him we gradually built up our love and adoration of him.

Dianne - there are several threads that talk of winding babies.
The exercises mentioned below are a good start. Also massaging baby's tummy (apparently in a clockwise direction).
Other things to do:

1. boiled, cooled teaspoon of water (I've not tried this, but read on several threads that this works like a charm);
2. infacol (did not work for ds, but some people swear by it. I found it rather pricey);
3. Woodwards Gripewater (the only thing that worked for ds - he had wind problems and colic problems). If you are going to use gripewater, check the lable. Some of them have alcohol in them! But Woodwards does not. We started giving ds about one to two mls when he was two weeks old. Every time he had some he would either let out a huge burp or fart about 15 to 20 seconds later (especially if he moved from lying down to sitting or from sitting to lying down - the movement seemed to help the intensity of the release of the wind). It was very impressive - and really relieved his pain.

Kelli - I have the same problem with dd. She will not sleep in her moses basket at night. Although she is getting a little better. Tricks include warming up the basket before she gets in. Putting an unlaundered shirt of mine by her nose so that she can smell my smell. She sleeps fine in the day, but night time is a nightmare!

WELCOME to the post natal thread STM - hope it wasn't too painful xxx

Conrad has the cold now poor little mite, he couldn't settle in his cot last night so slept chest to chest with his daddy... AAAAAHHH an image to commit to memory for good - lovely to have him around now he's finally got his paternity leave.

I'm a happy bunny today

Firsttimemum ~ Alice doesn't feed for very long either but I am trying not to worry. I think she is a much more efficient feeder than dd1 was. When Alice has her middle of the night feed, she gulps straight away and I am certain she gets to the hind milk within a few minutes. Other times she grazes for a bit, stopping and satrting, and never gets to the massive gulp stage.

I say don't stress about it. They take what they need when they need it. All babies are different - I don't think it is possible to quantify how long it takes to get to the hindmilk. If your DB is putting on weight then everything must be fine.

Bubbles ~ I'm so sorry to hear that you had a distressing birth experience and that you're unable to talk about it. Did you mention it to your community midwife at least? Why don't you put it down in writing so if you want to talk about it at a later date or raise some issues with the hospital, you'll have all the details documented.

My experience was not physically traumatic and I realise it barely compares to what some people go through. I think it is all relative. I watched 'He's having a Baby' last night and shed a tear after watching that woman give birth at home. I feel so mad with myself for not opting for a homebirth. Looking at that brand new baby surrounded by her family in the safety and comfort of her home looked to me how babies should come into the world.

Luckily my birth did not affect how I felt about dd2 when she was born. Perhaps becuase she looks so much like dd1 it was easier to fall instantly in love with her as I felt like I knew her already. Once again, I'm sorry that you've suffered a terrible experience.

STM - Stitches can be a pain. Try putting some pure lavendar oil or tea tree oil into a bath and have a shallow bathe in it every day.

Alice and I are having some girl time together - she was sleeping but now as she has woken up I think he and I should enjoy some activity together.

We might go to an NCT Bumps and Babes group that is in the next village along - as DS is at nursery we seem to be rattling around the house a bit.

HV came yesterday and all was well - Alice was enjoying a nice sleep in the Moses basket while DS was pottering around. Yesterday went a lot better than I had been anticipating which was good.

Alice appears to be drifting off again...hard life being a baby .

Beatie, i did speak to my midwife about it, she was lovely and even commented on the two mws who was with me in labour being nasty old women. very unproffesional of her i suppose but it cheered me up LOL. i was due a home visit on the monday, and the only mw working was the one i had in labour as mine had a day off, so she organised for herself to come out on the sunday, so i didn't have to see the BITCH again.
sorry for the choice words but it was the only way to describe her without being too mean.
KK, i did get the rush of love, but it was about 10 mins later as there was such a lot going on at the time and it was about 10 mins before i even held her.
Sorry for going on with myself, hope all mums and babes (and also those still with child) are all ok.

Bubbles - no need to apologise. You have not "gone on" (and even if you did, that is what we are here for!). Glad you got your "rush of love", as we never did for ds - it was just a gradual thing that built up over months.

Finally managed to get a few minutes for that MN fix!
Life not so easy this week. Hopefully it's just a phase, but Nell v unsettled at night. Horrid pattern of feeding, putting in cot, screaming, pick up, burps,put in cot, screams, pick up, burps....etc etc. Spent 2 hours after each feed doing this in night, then ended up with her on my or dh's chest. Half of me thinks this is a bad habit to get into, the other half thinks anything for a bit of sleep. am also worried that she could overheat on top of us, under the duvet.. So much for my easy third baby May try infacol, but really wanted feeds to be as simple as possible.
Have also discovered I have a hernia on my tummy button. It was v uncomfortable all through pg, but no one seemed interested, but my dad (ex-gp) had a look and announced a hernia. Got myself in a bit of a state about having to have it repaired, but hope they might just leave it alone if it's not too uncomfortable...
My Mum goes home tomorrow, then I'll have my first day on my own!! Sure it'll be fine, but a bit nervous! dh meant to be going out to big awards ceremony on Friday night, but one look at my face made him realise that there is no way he's leaving me on my own for an evening yet!
MIL coming down at weekend, hopefully will help more than hinder as don't feel at my most patient!!
End of moans!
Congrats to the new recruits to this thread - still no news from Kiwifruit!?

Almost forgot, re swaddling - what do you do it with Franch? Just a sheet, or blanket? Do you then put sheets/blankets on top? Has anyone used a grobag yet - thought this might help if not being put back into a cold cot?

Thanks for that Beatie.

Andif: we seem to be having a similar experience with our newborns not sleeping, crying etc. With me, not having been a parent before I really do not know what is normal and what isn't. All I know is that being a new mum to a newborn is SOOOOOO much more difficult than I had ever expected. DH and I are in a constant state of anxiety. Things didnt start out very well anyway, with a 72 hour labour and difficult birth in which DB swallowed meconium and his heart rate kept dropping so he had to be taken out by emergency ventouse. I didnt hold him for a while after that then spent 3 horrible nights in St Thomas' hospital. Then we both had thrush and he has also had a sore thumb (caused by his constant knawing on it) and a blocked nose! He cries alot and doesnt seem very happy when he is awake. He seems uncomfortable in his own skin, which I feel terrible about. Mum asked me if he is a "happy baby", hoping I would say that he was, but I had to admit that he seemed to be a very unhappy baby. I have this feeling of dread at the pit of my stomach when he is asleep that he is going to cry at any second and want to be fed, which I am not inclined to do more often than every 2-1/2 to 3 hours because of my sore boobs and because I suspect that he is only wanting comfort.

Sorry for the pouring out of emotion! Hopefully for any other mums feeling similarly it will help to know that its not just them feeling like this ...

Andif, for swaddling I use a cotsize cellular blanket because its stretchy and wont completely restrict his movement. I make sure that he is wrapped (but not necessarily swaddled) in the blanket during feeding so that when I put him to bed straight after he has already warmed it up and doesnt have to be taken out and put into cold sheets etc.

Bubbles - I got a text from work, but that's it. I too feel a bit 'scarred' about the whole birth thing, have shed a few tears about it. It was more of a relief than a joy when she came out! I too wanted 3 little ones, and am sure I will have another one one day, but me + DH are a bit traumatised by the whole thing, and it does make you think twice

STM - congratulations! I can recommend the arnica for the stitches, and also Bellis Perenis + Chamomilia (or something along those lines!). I felt much better quicker than I thought I would, so perhaps it was all the homeopathy!

Breast pumping going ok, still only able to get 20-40mls out at a time, but trying to do it every 2hrs for a couple of days in the hope that it'll increase the supply. Do you think this is ever possible, as I've not been properly b'feeding for so long now?

Firsttimemum - I really feel for you. DH and I can so easily remember the anxiety we felt over looking after our first dd... and I remember that fear of her waking up always being there in the pit of my stomach.

DD wasn't an easy newborn but she was quite small 6lb 5oz when she was born so probably needed to feed every 2 hours when she was first born. She didn't sleep through the night until around 5 months whereas all my NCT friends' babies slept through the night of their own accord by about 3 months!

Have you considered crannial osteopathy for your baby? Someone I know had a ventouse delivery and it was recommended to them. After the first session, the baby slept for more hours than it had ever done. She came to visit me after one of the baby's sessions and there wasn't a peep out of this baby for the whole 4 hours they were at my house - and he was only 3 weeks old.

Bubbles, LadyL and anyone else feeling traumatised: I went through this after DD1's birth, as you may know. The Birth Trauma Assoc is very helpful and has a website. Many hosps also offer 'debriefing', which can help. I do so sympathise.

1stimemum: yes I did mean what you thought I meant about sucking the snot out

zoezebra & 1stimemum: we're currently looking at houses in Clapham so maybe we'll join you there soon

andif: At the moment I'm using a jersey cotton sheet to swaddle DD2; when it gets colder I'll use a cellular blanket. Definitely no bedding on top. Used a sleeping bag with DD1 to start with but she never really slept till we started swaddling her.

Slightly worried about pumping: with DD1 I pumped more or less from the start because of a terrible cracked nipple, so she got her first bottle of EBM at about 2 weeks and DH started doing the bedtime feed regularly from about 3 weeks. I've always thought that was why we never had any problems giving her a bottle. This time round I simply cannot be bothered to express - it's so boring and difficult to fit in when you've got a newborn and a toddler - so DD2 is nearly 4 weeks and there's no prospect of her being offered a bottle for a while yet. I'm just a bit worried that I might be making it difficult for her to take a bottle later on, and also depriving DH of the chance to feed her ...

ANDIF - We have been using growbags and am finding them much better for our little fidget as he can no longer kick the covers off and make himself clod and doesn't have to go back into a cold bed after a feed, we have also been putting an unlaundered shirt underneath him whilst he sleeps. I am pleased to report that he now sleeps much longer.

LadyL - you are doing well. I have been exclusivley expressing for 2 weeks now and manage 20 - 40mls every two hours. A suggestion off one of the feeding threads is to express for 10mins every half hour to increase supply.

Franch - I'll join you in the can't-be-bothered-to-express club. Am planning to wait until about 6 weeks this time, then to build up as much a possible in the freezer so we can go out. DD never took to a bottle, so I think I'll be trying to get Tom to cup-feed a little once a day if he also rejects the bottle completely. With dd I expressed pretty much from the word go and ended up with heaps in the freezer, mostly used once she had solids, for making porridge and baby rice.

1sttimemum - sometimes babies need to feed more frequently than 2=hourly. esp in early evenings or when they are having a growth spurt(it is called "cluster feeding"). This is how they build up your milk supply when they need more. Putting him to the breast when he is unsettled (if you are not too sore) might help increase your supply and make him more settled (they do go longer between feeds after a few weeks - but at first their tummies are tiny and they cannot handle a lot in one go). Also, often a baby will want to suckle for comfort (in which case they won't do "proper" drinking) - this is a natural part of things, and again, if you can stand it, your baby might be comforted by it and less unsettled. There are some very useful threads on mn which might also help. Be assured that bf is a tricky thing and you are not alone and it does get easier with time and practice (by you and by baby)!!

Franch & Harrizeb - thanks for the advice about nasal aspirators/decongestors. I got one today, and it seems to be helping a lot, although not eliminating congestion/snot altogether

Ftm - I am with you on frequent feeding - just posted on bf discussions. My angel is now 4 weeks and wanting the breast every hour - round the clock! This has been going on for three daysand Ive tried everything to no avail. Im shattered.

STM - Congrats on Noahs arrival!

Andif - We are using grobags - great invention!

Bubbles/LadyL - sorry you still feel so traumatised. Talking will help.

LadyL - impressed by your 2 hourly expressing. Well done.

Those using gro-bags already - what clothing are you putting on your baby underneath? We started using a Gro-bag at 4 months with dd1 and I loved it so I would consider getting a first size one for dd2. It's so much easier to pick the baby up and feed her like that.

Those expressing LL and Mummyhill - well done, I am impressed.

Firsttimemum - Alice cluster feeds hourly in the evening and during the early part of the day. This sets her up for some big sleeps later on and is probably how we get a 4 hour stretch of sleep between 11 and 3am.

Did anyone watch "He's having ababy" yesterday? I could not understand why Roberta got up in the night, heated up a bottle of expressed milk, went back to bed and fed it to her baby!! She'd breastfed earlier. What a lot of faff! I thought she was going to give it to her partner to feed the baby whilst she got some more sleep.

DS now 1 wk & 2days!! feel like it was years ago I was preg. bf going well - soreness over. typing with one hand here!
tricky dealing with my 3 dds - timewise I don't have a moment to spare. dh still taking them to school - next wk it will be my job again! 2 schools to get too & 3 kids to organise. Not counting getting ds & myself ready to go out!
co-sleeping so can at least bf in bed.
ds had jaundice probs. Phototherapy in hospital on his 3rd day & blood tests this week. Levels of biliruben are going down now. best wishes to all.

Hiya,
Do any of you know of any good groups to talk to about a tramatic birth? Our dd, Bethan was born 10days ago, and even now, when I think how the labour went (the cord ended up around her neck) I get extremally teary. I know ive still got all the hormones etc in my body, but i really hate feeling this way.
Thx

Try the Birth Trauma Assoc jofeb - they have a website - and there's a Birth Trauma MSN group. Typing 1-handed now with baby on right shoulder but will post links another time if you can't find them. I've been there and really feel for you. Hugs.

Regarding the growbag we put ds in a short sleved vest and a babygrow under his grow bag and if it gets exceptionally cold we will do what we did with dd and just drape a blanket over him rather than spend a fortune buying different tog growbags.

Which tog bag are you using Mummyhill?

Weare dressing dd in a shoert sleeved vest, babygrow and usually a 1 tog bag. Room temp btwn 20-22 C. HTH and hope this is right!!
Got 2 x 2.5hrs sleep last night so feel a bit better. Meeting my nct crowd for tea this pm so will have a good moan.