We came, we saw, we frolicked. 
Now our PFB has arrived and we can begin the stressful befuddled guiltridden exhausting wonderful journey of parenthood!
(Or at the very least we can stop bothering the antenatal bunch until they join us!)
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The Final Fruition of the Frolicking Forays for the First Time Frolickers
739 replies
Spirael · 30/09/2010 16:18
OP posts:
bunnygirl80 ·
26/10/2010 23:05
roses it's great that you've got so much support. And probably pretty unusual that there are 2 other babies in your area with the condition, considering how rare it is.
Can't wait till I'm on this thread officially 
Friends keep telling me that the last few weeks of pg are designed to make the first few weeks with a newborn seem easy in comparison
Spirael ·
27/10/2010 10:23
Wow, the level of support you're receiving sounds great, WhiteRoses. :) It is unfortunate that your LO has PKU, but it sounds like it's something that's not too problematic to keep under control.
Probably not quite the same, but I have two friends who are gluten intolerant and one of them is diabetic as well. They have quite restricted diets, but neither of them are particularly worried about it and both quite like the fact that they aren't tempted by all the junk food that everyone else is so can stay slim and healthy!
As friends with them, it's just something I'm aware of when we go out to eat or they come over for dinner, so I can make sure there are things available for them to eat. In fact it adds a fun challenge at times to find ways to make delicious alternatives to dishes they couldn't normally have!
So while there might be some difficult times ahead, I don't think your LO is going to particularly miss out on anything. In fact, he might even gain a lot from it as he'll likely learn to be a wonderful chef in order to make his own special meals.
I think he's beating Mindy with growing out of the clothes, just. 
She's just about to go into 6-9 months... She's not 4 months old until early November!
OP posts:
WhiteRoses ·
27/10/2010 14:54
Oooh - no more tumbleweed on this thread!
Yorkshire - it's good to see you back - I think we all missed you while you were away for a bit. I can't believe you're due already - you seemed to get your BFP quite a while after me, but then I suppose my little newborn is coming up for 6wks old - just doesn't seem like it!
What I've been told about the diet is that in adulthood, yes, you can relax it a bit, in that you won't really do any damage if you do because your brain's no longer developing, but that most people find it's not worth the side effects of then feeling tired, headachey, irritable and a bit down afterwards. So I don't know.
Actually, they initially used to say that this diet could be relaxed at the age of twelve. The person I went to school with's sister also has PKU and was amongst the unfortunate group of people who counted down to her 12th birthday and planned what she was going to eat, only to be told at the age of 11 that the diet was now for life. :( Very harsh.
Bunny - there are only three hospitals in the country who run clinics for PKU, and my closest one is the largest and most central, hence the other two babies having the same dietician and metabolic consultant as my LO has! The actually live miles away, but the dietician was saying that some people try and time visits to the clinic to coincide with each other, and then they can meet up before or afterwards. So that's quite good, and the hospital usually help out by trying to give people appointments close together too.
What you've heard about the last few weeks (weeks? months!) of pregnancy vs. coping with a newborn seems about right to me! The hardest time I found was in hospital, because I was very very anaemic, had just been through labour, had a third degree tear and was coping with LO all night on my own (will never forget the second night, where he stayed awake from when DH left to 7am!) But once home, I was able to get into bed and sleep, and let DH deal with LO, under strict instruction only to wake me if my boobs were needed! It was bliss. I only woke to stay in bed and feed, not like during pregnancy where I was up and down to the toilet and up and down drinking milk for the heartburn, unable to get comfortable no matter what position I lay or sat in! Even then, the second night at home, where DH and I took turns wasn't too bad. And it's good having company too. Sitting up, awake and in pain, on your own isn't half as much fun as gazing loving at your LO, while discussing with DH exacly why he (LO, not DH!) is just THE most perfect creature on the whole planet!
Spireal - unfortunately, I think LO's diet is almost the reverse of your friend's, in that it seems that it's the fattening stuff he IS allowed! Basically, he's allowed no meat of any description, no fish, eggs, dairy products, nuts, cheese, soya, quorn, tofu, seeds or sweetners (meaning all diet drinks, sugar-free chewing gum, etc. is out of the question!) He'll be allowed very small amounts of potatoes, some vegetables (broccoli, cauliflour, Brussels sprouts, peas, sweetcorn, baked beans and frozen mixed veg), rice and cereals, providing he accounts for exactly how much he has and doesn't exceed a certain limit. And then he'll be allowed all fruit (though only small portions of dried fruit and no more than one small banana a day), several other types of vegetable (that I can't be bothered listing!), herbs, spices, non-instant custard powder, sago, tapioca, arrowroot, cornflour, butter, full fat margarine, lard, cooking oils,and then all kinds of sugar, jam, honey, mamalade, ready to roll icing, syrup, treacle, boiled sweets and food colouring. It's a bit of a nightmare diet really. One of the first things I asked was "is it like a diabetic or coeliac diet?" and I got told it's a lot stricter than that - they weren't kidding! I think there's a lot that LO will never be able to do, but we'll just have to try and come up with the best alternatives we can for him. The person I went to school with had a packed lunch of nothing but sweets when it was the school Christmas dinner, for instance, making her the envy of her friends, rather than the other way round. And at Easter, she got new toys instead of Easter eggs, to make up for not being allowed chocolate. Things like that. Oh I dunno. But we'll manage one way or another - there's nothing else for it, and as has been said, we have really terrific support, so are very lucky in a way.
Gosh! 6-9mths! Two little fatties that we have! What weight was Mindy when she was born? I didn't think she was exceptionally big? And you went over with her, didn't you? Oh well, you're obviously doing something right! Though personally I'm hoping growth slows down a bit as he gets bigger - not looking forward to having to keep replacing his wardrobe at this rate! 
Spirael ·
27/10/2010 15:56
Hee, it was actually the opposite, WhiteRoses. Mindy was two weeks early! She was 8lbs 3oz when born, and I think she's around 15lb 7oz now at 16 weeks. However she was also 55cm long at birth and is up around 63cm now.
It's the length more than anything that's making her outgrow her clothes, but she's quite skinny around the waist so the bigger trousers just fall down! I blame her 6 foot and thin as a rack Daddy... Though it is very sweet to see her taking so much after my DH. I'm pretty sure she has the genes for his hands and eyes. :)
That does sound like a very restrictive diet you'll have to implement. 
Though there are lots of yummy fruits in the world at least. :) You could have fun exploring them all with your LO. Lots of unusual ones to be found at markets normally.
Is coconut milk any good, as that can be a good alternative? And how about some of the other flours, such as semolina or gram/chickpea? Strange that butter is allowed and milk/cheese isn't!
OP posts:
WhiteRoses ·
02/11/2010 13:25
Gosh, this thread's after going very quiet again!
Spireal - I remember you saying "any day now" and wanting to hide behind the sofa - that must've been when you got to term, was it? I was thinking it was after you reached your EDD.
I think my LO is just solid really... I've always known he was on the 91st centile for his weight, but only found out yesterday that he's above the 99.6th for length! 61.7cm - big lump! No wonder he's in 3-6mth stuff - oh, and one particular 3-6mth snowsuit is already a bit on the short side... I think (hope!) it's just that it's small-made though! He has several 3-6mth outfits that he's never worn, and silly me, I went mad and washed everything in the beginning, so all the tags are off... Oops!
What height are you Spireal? Are you tall too? I'm 5'8" so tall for a girl, and DH is 6'2". Both tall but not abnormally so.
I think coconut milk is allowed, but amn't sure really... There's such a lot to take in and solid foods are still a while off.
Yesterday we were at the hospital (where LO got measured) and they were talking more about the diet. I don't know if I mentioned that although LO can't really tolerate protein (one of the amino acids that make up protein actually), he will still need a certain amount in order to grow. Anyway, we're obviously hoping he's allowed as much as possible, but till yesterday had no idea how much that'd be. (Well, we still don't and won't know till he goes onto solids, and then it'll be trial and error till we get it right.) Anyway, we were told the range yesterday. Apparently it's from 2g to 10g a day. 10g would be great so here's really hoping. It's much more than either of us initially thought.
In other news, there's a big annual meet-up on Saturday that all children with metabolic conditions in the country, and their families are invited to go to. Not PKU specific but there will be people there with experience of it, and talks from dieticians, etc. which will be interesting. We've decided to go but it'll be a two hour drive there, and a two hour drive back, as well as the thing itself lasting six hours... Is it wrong that I'm absolutely dreading it?! The thought of packing the changing bag alone terrifies me! We're going to need so much stuff! And it wouldn't be the first time that we've had to pull over at the side of the road either and feed LO... I'd be really surprised if he went a whole two hours during the day without eating... He's not the size he is for no reason! Oh well, I guess we'll cope and it'll be good to meet other people (providing I don't spend the whole day locked in a room, feeding!) God, I'm SUCH a pessimist! (Please tell me you've all felt the same way and I'm not just a bad mother?!)
bunnygirl80 ·
02/11/2010 22:40
Just popping in to keep my place marked!!
roses that sounds like it'll be a loooooooooong day, but great that you'll get to meet lots of other parents and children in the same boat as you.
Hope you manage to fit all the stuff you need in the car. One of my friends had to buy a roof box to transport all their DD's stuff in
pixiestix ·
03/11/2010 00:09
Roses, I've only just had a chance to connect to the internet and read your posts (we have been having all kinds of computer ishoos). Holy shit! 
That must have been such a shock, and such a lot to take in. Its fantastic that the doctors have discovered it so quickly, and I guess because LO isn't going to be eating solids for another five months or so you have time to plan and investigate, but still, that must have turned your world upside down
Your little boy sounds like he is healthy and happy though. He was already waaaay bigger than Teg when he was born. She is five and a half weeks now and is roughly eight and a half pounds! There is no way she'll be growing out of her 0-3 month clothes any time soon - she can still fit into her newborn ones! Loads of family members bought her clothes in the 3-6 month range thinking that we would be inundated with newborn things - DH and I looked on the weight chart in the red book and if she carries on on the 9th centile, which she is at the moment, she won't be in those clothes until she is 13 months old She is perfect and bouncy and healthy though, just very wee!
Spirael - Mindy is absolutely lovely, I want to give her a big squidge!
WorrisomeHeart ·
03/11/2010 05:07
Hiiiiii!! Nice to be over on this side of the fence!! (Excuse the typing, am pumping with the other hand.)
roses can I just say again how well you are dealing with this? I say go to the meetup - you'll get such good support contacts.
pixie she is a wee one, isn't she?! I bet she'll be one of those lovely dainty little girls that great brutes like my Lochie try to kiss in the playground!!
spireal It is lovely seeing your DH (and yourself!) come out in your LO, isnt it? Lochie seems to be mostly DH at the mo - right down to his vry long toes! He's got my hair colour and blood type though, so all is not lost!
Alright experienced mummies, I need some advice. I keep reading that its really importanrt to put Lochie down for playtime on his front. When did you guys start doing this? He doesn't have that long of an active awake state - mostly it's feed, change and then back to sleep. I wondered if it was just a matter of waiting until he was a couple of weeks older and the active awake periods are longer, or should we be trtying to find the right time now?
Spirael ·
03/11/2010 13:50
Yep, I think I was hiding when I was 37 weeks, WhiteRoses. Fortunately I didn't have to stay behind the sofa for very long-! Now I just spend my time sitting on it, we've just reached the 4 month growth spurt here and I can't actually get the milk into Mindy fast enough.
I'm pretty short myself, only about 5'3 or so, so Mindy's definitely taking after her Daddy with height! According to my MIL, my DH used to shoot up in height then fill out before shooting up again, which is exactly what Mindy seems to do. She tends to hover on about 25% for weight though, she's tall and skinny! (Doubt she'll complain...)
We've had another height burst in the last week, she's just gone into the 6-9 month sleepsuits!! I was a bad Mummy and bought some blueish boys ones from M&S, because I get very bored with pink all the time. If anyone is looking for things though, Boots actually have some very nice sleepsuits that aren't just blue for boys and pink for girls.
Going out for a day isn't too bad as long as you're over-prepared, I find. :) Do a pack-mule impression and make sure you have plenty of food, changes of clothes (for everyone!), bibs, muslin squares, a first aid kit, nappies, loads of wipes, etc. However, normally I find that Mindy feeds slightly less than normal, because she gets interested in everything happening and/or gets rocked to sleep with the movement, especially in the car. So you'll be fine! Have fun!
Incidentally, does your LO have a name, WhiteRoses? Or can we start a guessing game..?
Aww, Tegan sounds so cute, pixie! I sometimes wish Mindy had stayed smaller a little longer - she was only in newborn clothes for about a week! And now she's over a stone, she's heavy to lug everywhere...
Ooh, you know Lochie's blood type, WorrisomeHeart? I was told they wouldn't test Mindy's, so it remains a mystery. I'm AB, so pretty rare, and DH doesn't know his type, but if O then Mindy could be any of them!
The only things I've found she seems to have from me so far are her ears and nose, but I carry out a daily freckle hunt on her as I'm covered in them! :)
For tummy time, I didn't really start doing that with Mindy on any kind of regular basis until she was smiling and liked playtime, so about 7 weeks-ish. She only gets about 10 mins on her front though per day as she seems to hate it and squeals angrily!! She tolerates being leant forwards over an inflatable ring or supported by a rolled towel under her arms a bit better, and I figure it should still be good for muscle development. Hope that helps!
OP posts:
WhiteRoses ·
03/11/2010 15:49
That's more like it - a bit busier today!
Lol Bunny - I think the roof box mightn't be the worst idea! A Mirca's probably not the most ideal family car! Lol!
Pixie - sorry to hear about your computer trouble. Yeh, it was all a bit of a shock - "world upside down" is actually the phrase I've used. Still, as you say, lots of support and lots of time to plan. Got the programme in for Saturday and they're covering as far ahead as leaving home to go to uni so plenty to think about! Lol!
Gosh - Tegan must be sooo gorgeous! A real tiny baby! Everyone'll be thinking she's newborn for ages! All I keep getting is "wow - big boy - how big was he when he was born?" Lol! Not that I care. Mind you, at least you're getting the use out of all your presents... My LO had newborn stuff that he never fitted, and some 0-3mth stuff that he wore only once. Still, him growing this fast gives Mum a great excuse to keep buying more more little outfits for him! Between her doing that, and other people having bought us presents up to 6-9mths, all we've bought for LO since he was born is a few short sleeved baby gros. And that was only because we threw out the ones he'd crapped over when we couldn't get the stains out - what is that stuff made of?! Lol! Felt very wasteful but at £2 for 7 in Asda, it's what got us through the first couple of weeks, before we got into a bit of a routine. (Oooh, I'm so bad... The poor environment... And I use disposable nappies. And I tumble dry almost every day... Guilty, guilty... 
)
So how are you feeling about the breastfeeding and cuddles thing now Pixie? I remember you saying to Ozzie that you felt that you couldn't cuddle Tegan without her wanting to attach herself to your boob? I remember because I remember totally relating to it, having thought I was the only one who felt that way. LO enjoyed cuddles from all sorts of people - total strangers even, and yet all he wanted me for was milk! I just felt like a giant walking boob! Still, that's very much settled down now - though possibly because I'm no longer the only one feeding him?
Are you getting smiles yet? Think my LO must've been about Tegan's age (terrible that I've forgotten but at least I keep a diary!) when he first smiled, and he hasn't stopped since. It's great, especially seeing as he saves most of his smiles for me! Being a walking boob clearly isn't a bad thing in his eyes! Lol! It's so funny when he's mid cry/protest, and then he spots me opening my bra, and gives a big grin. He has a one track mind! Big appetite like his daddy. (Just hope he doesn't have his mummy's metabolism or he'll be the most obese child ever!
Worrisome - nice to see you here! What you say about coping - there's nothing else for it. We are going to go on Saturday - think we owe it to LO - it's an annual event and there's going to be lots of new information at it. Doesn't stop me dreading the prospect of it though!
Oooh, I don't really know about tummy time... See, I've done it from pretty early on, because one of the things I was advised to try when having trouble with latching, after introducing bottles, was a thing called biological nurturing. You should Google it - it's quite amazing. Anyway, my LO gets tummy time pretty much whenever he feeds, as a result of that, so it's not something I tend to focus a lot on, in that I tend to only pop him down on his belly on his own every other day or so... Should maybe be doing it more?
Gosh Spireal - how long's Mindy feeding for then? My LO is taking fomula to start with each time, and then topping up with my milk, so is usually pretty full when he gets to me. That means he tends only to do between 5 and 20 minutes, but seeing as it's at the beginning that your milk flow's fastest, the dietician reckons he must still be getting more than half from me.
Oooh, Mindy'll be the envy of all her friends with a supermodel figure! Lucky girl! :)
Lol - I've already started putting things in a pile to take with us, Spireal - pack mule impression should be a doddle! Mind you, a change for DH and I isn't a bad idea - hadn't thought of that... And it was only last week that I was out with LO, changing his nappy and he peed all down my jeans (boys and their little hose pipes! ) I then had to wait several hours to change when I got home, and, if I'm honest, I actually forgot to for a couple of hours cause it had dried in... See what I'm reduced to?! Walk about covered in pee and I don't even care! 
I don't blame you for getting Mindy the blue sleepsuits... I remember before my 20wk scan, I looked at girl stuff too, and it IS just all pink. At least boys have some variety - different shades of blue, green, brown, grey, red... Mind you, that was a mistake I made initially - trying to make sure there was some variety in LO's wardrobe, and he had a few nice distinctive things... Now I've made sure that his 3-6mth gear is mix and match - will make life a lot easier!
Yeh, Spireal - my LO is called Joseph. I tend just to refer to him as "LO" though, out of paranoia... Wouldn't like anyone in RL to be able to suss out my identity on here... There are FAR too many posts describing everything from my CM to my nipples!
Oooh, the idea of a rolled up towel sounds good - I hadn't thought of that. Like Mindy, my LO isn't the boggest fan of tummy time either. Think he gets annoyed that he can no longer see what's going on! One thing I have done, similar to the towel idea, and also figuring that it won't do his muscles any harm, is to balance him chest to chest, so that with me lying flat on my back, my boobs boost him up a little. He seems to prefer that, and it means he can see my face too, which, oddly, he likes!
God, this post is getting sooo long (even by my standards!) But quickly, on the "who does LO look like" topic... I see him very like my dad a lot of the time, with some expressions... Actually, it's more when my dad makes a face and I go "oh my God, that's my baby's face!". But having said that, I also see LO very like DH. That seems to be the general consensus amongst everyone really - that LO either looks like my dad or my DH. No one really says he looks like me. However, from the beginning, my mum always said she thought it was like going back in time and holding baby me in her arms again, because he's so like me as a baby, and when she looked out my baby pictures, you can totally see it. It's actually really weird, because in some, you'd swear I was my LO, if it weren't for the horrendous 80's clothes and furniture in the background! Everyone that Mum's showed my baby pictures to completely agrees - it is spooky. So I guess he must be a real mixture!
Oh, and (last thing!) I was just thinking about last year and *SpookyPixieBroomstix" - imagine we've all been on here for over a year now... And some year it's been! Doesn't seem that long really in a way, does it though? Or is that just me?
Spirael ·
03/11/2010 16:31
How long is Mindy feeding for? Well, she started at 7am today and we're still going...
Nah, I have had brief gaps to make lunch, do laundry, etc, but I'd say about 45 mins in every hour she's feeding at the moment. However she is mid-growth spurt, she normally feeds every 2 hours or so for about 20-30 mins greedy girl.
I can't really argue it though as she reliably sleeps 8pm-7am...
That's a lovely name, WhiteRoses. :) Classic, easy to spell, nice nicknames and yet not one you hear too often.
The last year seems to have passed in a flash, but also been a long journey! I know Mindy was conceived on Halloween, so it's strange to think she's technically existed for a year now. I suspect people would think us very weird for celebrating, though!
OP posts:
Spirael ·
07/11/2010 21:31
[Obligingly slaps some sense into WorrisomeHeart]
a) There is no way you should have a routine yet. Mindy is only just starting to get a proper routine now at 4 months!! It was at least a month in before we started to grab little bits of a routine, such as being able to take DH to work and pick him up each day and starting to have some kind of a proper bedtime.
b) It gets easier. :) It is a nightmare at first because you seem to spend your entire time working around filling your LOs tummy as often as possible! But slowly, over time, they start to go longer and longer, as well as being more easily distractable so you don't have to put food into them straight away. I wouldn't go anywhere alone with LO for the first month at least, but now I'll happily wander all over the place.
c) Not at all. In fact, you could find eventually you have the opposite problem... I was at my ILs this weekend and Mindy was getting upset when anyone other than me or DH cuddled her for any length of time! The other thing is that if BF is still going ok, then nipples are fantastic at pacifying. If in doubt, offer a nipple!
It does all get better and easier, I promise. :) The first six weeks are the hardest, by far. The next six weeks are a bit of a slog, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel by then, especially at about 7-8 weeks when you get that first gummy smile!
I think it was at about 14 weeks that things really started to click here, BF became completely pain free (I was struggling with thrush before then) and easy, going out wasn't a struggle any more and Mindy was starting to respond properly to me with gurgles/smiles. We've made long trips up and down the country without any major problems and she feels like a little human (rather than a demanding pet ) and a member of the family.
Don't worry about him sleeping on you during the day as long as nights are ok, just enjoy the time for cuddles. Mindy still doesn't like being set in her cot during the day, however she will take naps downstairs in her bouncy chair. So if you have a bouncy or swing chair, maybe try naps in there? Alternatively I had some success with the travel cot downstairs in the middle of all the action.
One thing I've started to learn now that I didn't realise before is just how much of a guilt trip parenting is. So you're not alone there! I was angsting yesterday about starting weaning before the recommended 6 months, but I still think I'm doing the right thing as Mindy seems to adore a little bit of baby rice, and it fills her up better and stops her cluster feeding all evening!
OP posts:
Spirael ·
08/11/2010 10:16
I would love to use a dummy with Mindy, WorrisomeHeart, but she won't take one! She just spits it straight out. If your LO will take one, I'd say go for it.
OP posts:
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Hermya321 ·
08/11/2010 12:39
Worrisome I'm using one, although it's mostly at night when I'm at the end of my tether. From my experience if DS is hungry he will spit the dummy out and cry until a breast is waved in front of his face. I don't think you ever reach a point where you don't question your decisions. Although if you're my Mum she states that every decision she ever made for us was the right one .
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