If I vote Tory, would I be shooting myself in the foot, as a lone parent?

[BertieBotts]

Just that really. I am musing. Never voted before and never been interested in politics (though I am fascinated by it all now) so I am feeling a bit blind with all this! I keep changing my mind about who to vote for.

I want to go back to college either this or next September rather than getting a job just yet. DS is 18 months. Do you think that I would be able to do this under a conservative government, or will I be forced to work? Thinking childcare costs etc. I can't find anything in any of the manifestos about it - does anyone know what the other parties have said or are likely to do?

"Just when I thouhgt you were talking sense atlantis. What a load of emotive crap "

I don't think so SS, when my ex walked out, cleaned out the bank accounts and I was forced to go to my first LPA meeting (my DD was nearly 3) I was made to feel like ' why didn't I want to work' (because I don't want to leave my child with strangers) 'what's wrong with putting your child in nursery?' ( it's not the same as being home with mum ) ' don't be silly, nursery gives a child an advantage' ( there are also disadvantages) 'you'll be far better off' (not once I pay the childcare and extra rent and council tax) ' here's the work out sheet, 10 pounds a week' ( whoopi).

Sorry, been there done that.

" There's a tory billboard ad around the corner from here saying "LET'S CUT THE BENEFITS OF PEOPLE WHO WON'T WORK""

Why do you assume that's aimed at single parents and not the work shy who have spent most of their lives on JSA and don't want to get a job?

"It's fine atlantis, better to have views from both sides anyway"

Word to the wise don't admit on here your voting Conservative if you decide to, you'll get attacked from all sides !!

OK then, show me where the tories have said that they won't hassle unwaged single parents on benefits back into the workplace?

Seriously, if you think your friends in this position are going to be left alone under a tory government, I think you're mistaken.

btw I'm not having a go at you because I don't like tories atlantis: I would love to see lone parents who want to stay at home with their children allowed to do so without being hassled or stigmatized. But I don't think any of the parties are proposing any such thing.

Yes Molesworth, I walk past one of those every day (on the way to our rather excellent sure start centre, might I add - I notice the tories are now saying they want to "improve" sure start ) and it makes me nervous!

My mum was a single parent from 1994 - present (my sister is still at home) and for years she couldn't work because she had M.E., but it was undiagnosed, so she had an awful time with benefits etc. This was when maintenence was taken straight from benefits as well and they never bothered to check if my Dad was paying or not, most of the time he wasn't. She is self employed now but only just managing.

Also, looking through the tory website on their families page, it says "...provide greater access rights to non-resident parents and grandparents" - what do you think this is likely to mean in practice?

"Channel 4's FactChecker"

Ok, sorry I dismiss channel 4, they are the daily mirror of tv, so i'm not even going to look at that.

Ok, have read the TM comment and that is confussing, so over 40k but under 50k, unless it was a typo, but still not under 40k.

"OK then, show me where the tories have said that they won't hassle unwaged single parents on benefits back into the workplace?"

Show me where it says they will.

I don't see your point though atlantis. As someone has already said, that kind of pressure will be much worse under the tories. They can't have it both ways. If you think the tories will just leave lone parents alone to bake their cookies, you are very shortsighted indeed.
I think the problem is more than a little bit to do with the 'media image' of the lone parent. The typical Vicky Pollard, 4 kids by 4 different fathers, sat on their arse all day with no intention to work. I don't doubt there are people like that out there, and yes it does a party good to be seen to be doing something to tackle that.
The reality is somewhat different.
I don't know anyone who has become a single parent by choice, to get a council house, or any of that cliched crap. I became a single parent because my ex decided responsibility wasn't his thing, a bit too late . I don't see why the government should punish me for that, or force me back to work. And indeed, the current government does not. What it has offered is a lifeline in the form of benefits when I've found myself out of work, and an allocated person in the form of the LPA who I can call anytime with any queries.
On the point of staying at home with your dc, I am conflicted by it. As a lne parent I do feel that there are people who judge me for being at home, despite that fact that this is through redundancy rather than my own fecklessness. I have a friend who was in my position at uni, we both had babies while studying. She has since married and stays at home with her dc. Our days are pretty similar as far as the day to day goes. They struggle on her partners wage just as much as I struggle on benefits. But one of us is portrayed by the media as being almost saintly, basked in a golden Boden glow. One of us is portrayed as practically scum. The only difference is the source of her income, and the ring on her finger. Had she not married, she too would be subject to 'back to work' meetings. As it is, while the state is paying for you to be at home, you will be demonised by certain parties and people. I can live with it at the current level. Under the tories I will be hung out to dry.

I wish I could, but I can't find any detail on their website. But nothing the tories have said during this campaign leads me to believe that unwaged single parents on benefits will be left alone unless they want to work outside the home. So you can't offer me any evidence to support your claim, and I can't offer you any evidence to support mine. It'll be interesting to see what happens. But if I were an unwaged single parent on benefits, there's no way on earth I'd be voting tory.

as for the stopping benefits of all who wont work, that would never happen, it wouldnt be allowed, the european human rights laws would step in, what do they supose doing? just stripping them of benefits, they would lose homes and starve and many would start rioting or turning to crime! err.....another well thought out tory policy

"Also, looking through the tory website on their families page, it says "...provide greater access rights to non-resident parents and grandparents" - what do you think this is likely to mean in practice? "

This is something I have a problem with ( yes, I do not tow the party line when bugged by something ).

The ffj group did a lot of campaigning with all three parties (and they all have the same ideas ) as well as the grandparents apart groups to enable better access for NRP and Grandparents.

But let's be clear (because I have been fighting for this with certain groups for years now ) that it is labour who started the family court escapade (which kept my DD tied up inside the courts for four years fighting access by a abusive father) they started cafcass, that T May absolutely hates ( good for her) and they opened the door to groups like ffj with their 'mainly' feckless fathers.

'Some mothers don't want to 'have it all' they want to stay at home with their children and bake cookies etc, without a LPA breathing down their necks.'

Sorry to go so far back on the thread, but what a bloody ridiculous thing to say.
Once your children begin full time education at 4/5 there is no reason on God's green earth why single mothers should not be working.

Many of us would love to stay at home and sew patchwork quilts, but once children are at school that is a luxury, not a right.

I do not want my taxes to pay for women to be all bunting and cupcakes whilst their children are out all day

Ah OK, I've found something:

"One of the most important issues is how we can best help single parents get into the workplace without placing unfair expectations on them. Conservatives opposed the Government when they suggested that single parents with children as young as one should be required to do work related activity or lose benefit, and we have been clear that benefit conditions should only come in once the youngest child is at school full-time. We also need to make sure that it pays for lone parents to take work opportunities by tackling the perverse incentives that can result in somebody earning less from working than they would on benefits."

(says Theresa May here)

"Under the tories I will be hung out to dry. "

But you don't know that, all your going on is the scare stories people are telling you and / of a government that was in power under MT.

Answer me this, why was nu-labour allowed to change from the Foot/ Kinnock days and yet DC and his team are not allowed to be different, are not allowed to be nu-conservatives for want of a better word.

So in fact the tories are going to start placing conditions on benefits when the youngest child starts school (5). Labour starts placing conditions on benefit when the youngest child is 7.

'work related activity' in that instance only means attend a LPA meeting twice a year though. An hour maximum, to tell you about the help available for getting back to work, not to FORCE you back into work. And I believe only if you refuse to go with no reason do they threaten to dock benefits, though I expect this is very rare in practice. The tories are making it sound like labour are a bloody gangmaster to lone parents when it's not the case at all

"as for the stopping benefits of all who wont work, that would never happen, "

Well I can't see how cutting off benefits completely would work either tbh and would like more info on how they would do this, but labour do 'cut' peoples benfit now if they don't take a job placement on JSA , but i'm not sure how that works either so... ?

If you want an impartial view you could do a lot worse than have a look at the bbc election website-it gives clear comparable summaries of the 3 main party's policies on a range of issues.
Or have a look at the manifestos they're all on line.

"Once your children begin full time education at 4/5 there is no reason on God's green earth why single mothers should not be working."

I never said there was did I? We were talking about toddlers.

I'm only a youngun atlantis, and only speakign from experience. But I would say it's because people still remember the last tory government and how it personally made them worse off. The fact that when working I have to pay a hideous amount of rent to my private landlord is as a direct result of the housing stock being sold off.

"Ah OK, I've found something:"

Thanks you molesworth, it seems you know conservative policy better than I do (see i'm not a troll !).

I never thought you were a troll atters!

And what about the single parents who want to home educate? Should they not be allowed to make that decision? It's not like they can afford Private school, so effectively that removes the only choice they have with their child's education - it's state school and that is that.

Also, what do you do during school holidays and at the end of the school day? There can't be that many jobs within schools themselves. (I don't really know much about this as DS is a while off school)

Atlantis Ok, so you dismiss channel 4 - handy for the sake of your argument eh!

Take a look at this then taken from the Parliament Website.

I've copied and pasted the relevant sections

"Mr. Timms: The total annual tax credit entitlement for families earning more than £50,000 is estimated to be approximately £45 million."

"Mr. Timms: To reduce total annual tax credit expenditure by £400 million, it is estimated that the second income threshold would need to be reduced to around £31,000."

This is why there is confusion Atlantis. If you read again what Theresa May said, the only reference to £50k is "Tax credits are designed to help families on low incomes, but we are now paying them to families earning over £50,000."

It's not a typo, the figure is quoted again on the Tories own website link and reads "Nobody with a combined household income of £40,000 or below will be affected, and the maximum loss for those earning more than £50,000 would be just £10 a week."