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Original poster

How old do you have to be to become a Christian?

12 replies

PinkFluffyslippers · 15/01/2010 07:12

Yes I know its an odd question.! For the past term DD aged 5 has been going to the after school club at the local church and loves it. I'm not a church goer but am happy for her to learn Bible stories and have fun with kids of her own age. Yesterday when I collected her from the club the leader said she'd recently been praying for DD (why I don't know!) and had asked DD yesterday is she wanted to have a special relationship with God. DD said yes. (DD was taken out of the room where the kids were play to have this conversation).

The leader quite rightly suggested to DD that she should talk to me first but DD insisted that she wanted to say the special prayer. So at the age of 5 DD has become a Christian but surely she has no idea what she's agreeing to. I feel rather annoyed that she was taken out of the room to have this private conversation - although I know the group leader had the best of intentions, I'd have been happier if this prayer was part of a group activity.

When I ask DD what she prays about she always says ice-cream!

WOuld be v interested to hear other people's opinions.

OP posts:

intravenouscoffee · 15/01/2010 07:39

As a Christian I do know a couple of people who consider themselves to have become Christian at a very young age and in all honesty I have always regarded this with a small amount of suspicion. I think the issue of faith is hugely complex and too much for a young child to fully comprehend. I was in my twenties before I even started to understand big parts of Christian theology (although maybe I'm just a bit slow on the uptake)so find it difficult to see how a child can make a fully informed decision and consider themselves to be a Christian in the true sense.
Having said that, I see no harm in children being involved in church activites as your DD is and learning about God from an early age. It's not clear why the group leader spoke to your DD on her own. Perhaps she had said something that the leader felt should be discussed in more detail. In fairness to the leader if your DD wanted to say a prayer to commit to God then that's not really a group activity. What are your concerns about this?

AMumInScotland · 15/01/2010 10:17

I wouldn't say that a 5yo can be a Christian in the same way as an adult can be a Christian - her understanding of what it's about really isn't at a level where she can make any kind of meaningful committment. But she can decide that, at the moment, she believes in God and wants to have a relationship with that God.

I think the tricky thing here is the clash between what you thought you were sending her for - bible stories and fun - and what the group leaders are hoping to achieve - giving the children enough grounding in Christianity to hope that they will decide to become Christians in due course.

"Saying a special prayer" doesn't make you a Christian, and I'm not sure what this leader means by it - it may depend on what denomination the gorup is connected to!

meltedchocolate · 15/01/2010 11:28

I think she can become a Christian - after all it is what is in her heart - but that her understanding will develop as she gets older. I think at her age now it is more about her love for God and God's love for her than fully understanding Christ's death and all that meant etc etc. I dont think there is an age that you have to be to have a relationship with God.

My brother always has been a Christian - he always loved God and knew God loved him and his understanding of Christ simply developed as her got older. I knew from a VERY young age that I didn't want to be a Christian (although I am now) so I don't see why you couldn't know the opposite from a fairly young age too.

I suspect the prayer was asking God to have a relationship with her and for Him to come into her life. I don't think it would have gone much deeper than that tbh.

SolidGoldBrass · 15/01/2010 11:35

I woudn;t be happy about this for a child of mine (but then wouldn;t send a child of mine to a myth-peddling youth group anyway). I do think that it's unlikely your DD understands very much about what 'Christianity' means and while I don;t think that saying a set of words she doesn;t fully comprehend will actually do her any harm, I would be concerned about the group leader's enthusiasm for recruiting kids into his/her pet cult.

tanmu82 · 15/01/2010 11:38

whilst a 5 year old may not understand all the various Theological elements of Christianity (who does? There are so many different schools of thought/beliefs) I don't think this is necessary to commit to God. All she needs to understand right now is that God loves her no matter what. As she grows older she'll learn and make more concrete decisions about what exactly she believes.

Children don't overcomplicate things like we adults do. They have a simple, pure faith.

Amuminscotland Why can't a child be a Christian in the same way that an adult can? I believe that God knows the intent of our hearts and age doesn't matter. He gave his life for all of us - we don't suddenly become eligible only when we reach a certain age.

As for saying a 'special prayer', this could be as simple as telling God that you want to know Him. A child may well only grasp part of this right now, but God doesn't honour that prayer any less than a wordy, theological prayer from an adult. In fact the Bible tells us that we need to be humble like children.
pinkfluffyslippers if you are at all worried I suggest you talk to the leaders at this group and maybe sit in on a session just so you can see for yourself what your daughter is involved in.

AMumInScotland · 15/01/2010 13:14

tanmu82 - I think a 5yo can believe in God, and relate to God, and be aware of God. But I don't think they can decide that Christianity rather than any other religion is the best/only/preferred way of relating to God and describing your beliefs. Until they have an understanding of what Christians believe, and how that differs from other religions, I don't think it's reasonable to say they are a Christian.

They can be a child who believes in God and is being raised in a Christian family/society though.

HallelujahHeisBorntoMary · 15/01/2010 15:34

I think children can declare their faith, and become a Christian. Many adults struggle to make all those decisions, I can't say that I'VE consciously and conscientiously investigated and then rejected all other religions in favour of Christianity. But I've made my choice and I believe its the right one. I think children can do the same.

It may be the leader wanted to be sure she knew what she was saying and perhaps the best place to do that would be away from the group, but for child protection reasons, I'd be a bit at this being done one on one.

Reallytired · 15/01/2010 22:41

God knows.

Can a five year old have faith - certainly.

Do they have understanding - no.

"When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me." 1 Corinthians 13:11

DutchOma · 17/01/2010 14:49

Jesus said:- "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these. I tell you the truth: anyone who will not receive the Kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." (Mark 10:14)

To me that seems to mean that 'little children' have more of a clue what it means to trust in Jesus than an adult has.

I have a recollection that HallelujayheisbornofMary once devoted a whole sermon to whether it was right to pray for icecream.

Having said that I don't think this child's 'prayer of faith' should have been an option while her parent wasn't there.

HallelujahHeisBorntoMary · 18/01/2010 07:08

I did!

madhairday · 19/01/2010 16:26

I don't think we can put an age limit on becoming a Christian, or however you care to put it. If we did, then surely we would also say that people with certain special needs could not be a Christian, because they could not have what we could term the necessary understanding.
I think children can have a faith. A very simple and uncomplicated type of faith, but no less authentic than that of an adult. Jesus after all said that people should come to him as a little child. Surely this type of faith is to be valued.
My dd 'said a prayer of commitment' at three years old. No more understanding than God loved her and she loved him back. But it was very real to her and she described a tangible encounter with God. I don't think there's any way she could not be described as a Christian, or as having an authentic faith.

I would perhaps take some issue with the leader taking her out of the room and not talking to you about it first. It doesn't seem to sit quite right. But I have no doubt your dd means what she said, with the understanding available to her, and that shouldn't be something that is real and to be treasured in her life.

zozzle · 28/01/2010 19:12

I became a Christian when I was seven. There is no age limit. I wandered away in my teens and came back to it in my mid twenties - so glad I did!

I think it is great that she has a faith. I'm sure leader had best of intentions and if it is a Christian church that is orthodox (ie. believes in the trinity) then I'm sure it isn't part of a "cult" as someone rather alarmistly suggested earlier, probably just a mainstream Christian church.

For child protection reasons the leader probably should have taken another leader with her, but do agree that praying a prayer to God to ask to know him more is more of a private, not a group activity.

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