How do I find the right church

[tracey256]

I am in a church that is not meeting my needs i have been here 3 years i am wanting to find the right church but am lacking condifence to do it. The chuch i am keeps being up my past and upsets me and my family i have talked e-mail and even wrote its now worse my children are not happy please help how do I find the right church thank you

The church is ghetting me down please help how do i find the right church and how do i know its the right church thanks

Have you visited other churches in your area?

Some people have found our church by it being 'recommend' by our local Christian book shop. Why not call in at yours and ask do they know anywhere close that's the type of church you feel comfortable in?(Evangelical, Pentecostal, High, Happy Clappy etc).

What do you feel is 'wrong' with your current church?

If you can identify that the style of worship is too informal and you're non-conformist then try moving to an Anglican church, if it's to formal and you're high Anglican try looking for a lower local one. If it's something more nebulous, like you don't like the people there, then get a recommendation from a friend (or Christian bookshop!). Does your town have a local churches together group who might be able to help?

It sounds really unfair that the church bring up your past and not very Christian tbh! Is it the preacher or the congregation that are making you unhappy?

It's not worth being unhappy in a church - they're supposed to be nourishing our faith but unfortunately sometimes the devil gets his hands in there.

Have you tried 'church shopping'?

My DH and I do this everytime we move to a new area. We commit to visiting every church in the locality (try google for a list) and make sure we tell each of them that we are 'just shopping around' ie. no commitment, just visiting until we find one we are happy with.

I don't think there is anything wrong with changing church, but worth explaining to the leadership (in both churches) your reasons for making the move. Otherwise nasty church gossip can start (e.g. St Thomas's are sheep stealers/St Catherine's drove them away etc...) which may not necessarily be true.

Ideally though, you will want your new church to know about whatever you past circumstances were and hope that they can have grace more grace with you than your current church. Without openness and honesty there won't be any intimacy or true fellowship and you will probably end up unhappy here too.

Also, at least they will hear your version before some nasty gossip from your previous church feels it's their place to inform them.

Did I read elsewhere that you attend a NF church? So, if the worship suits you, just not the people, do you like fairly lively worship then? Do you know what other options are in your area? Do you know much about the different denominations?

I guess the place to start is see what you are looking for and try to match it with what churches are in your area. If they have a website, that would help. Otherwise, could you call in when the church is open, but no worship is going on, to see if you can get a 'feel' for the place? Failing that, what it says on the church noticeboard? Eg things like, what activities are there for children?

Hope you can get it sorted. From what I read elsewhere, the church leadership isn't listening to you, is that correct?

Thank all for all your help thats has really helped me . No the leadership is not listering to me they said put up with it and that I am a bit over the top on this issue. Yes it is a n f church and i do like a lively church but not the one i am in its the people and they treat me as the old me back in August 2005 without god I will try church shopping thanks for that i am up front and will tell them about my past that i lost my kids into care and had them back now 2 years and why and where i am now i want them to here the truth for me and not from someone else I have moved on give my life to god and the n f church wont let me move on you are all right i am not have or my kids and i need to do something about it thank you all so much i will look for a new church and then changed thank you

Let us know how you get on...

Yeah, please do tell us how it goes.

I'm in an NFI church too at the moment. It's wasn't my first choice, but best in the area, and we love it now. I think it depends aa lot on who attends more than what denomination it is as to how you get on IYSWIM.

Good luck.