How do you join a church?

[sleepyeyes]

This probably seems like a completely stupid question but I honestly don't know how to go about it.
Do you just turn up at worship time and walk in?
Introduce yourself? I can be quite social ackward, on my first visit i would just like to be left alone.
Do you need to be baptised?

We have a church of scotland close by I would like to go an listen to a service before I commit but don't want be rude or make the wrong impression.

What happens during a church of scotland service?

YOu just go the services as a visitor for as long as you want AFAIK

Hi, it's perfectly normal to just turn up a few minutes before the start of the service and walk in. They may have someone on the door handing out hymn books etc, who may or may not chat to you - it varies a lot!

You don't have to be baptised to go to any services.

Most likely, a Church of Scotland service will not be a communion service. So there'll be bible readings, a sermon, and prayers. In some places the children from the Sunday school will be in the main church for the first part of the service, in which case there'll probably be a little "sermon" aimed at them, and a more "grown-up" one later, once they've gone out to the Sunday school.

Most churches are very welcoming of people they don't recognise, and they certainly will be happy to see a new face. They vary a lot in how much they'll try to chat to you, but if they do it's likely to be quite "light" so don't worry if you're not the most social person.

Thanks that's really helpful, I might try to find the time to go tomorrow.

sleepyeyes I don't know much about the Church of Scotland but I am a Christian and have been at various churches over the years. If it's been on holiday or something so I don't know the church at all I've always just turned up a few minutes before the service is due to start and as AMumInScotland said, there's usually someone in the entrance to 'welcome' you, they might give you a hymnbook, they might ask if you are just visiting - they're not probing you, just friendly I find! Anyone is welcome in a church - whether you know what you believe or not, baptised or not. Can I ask what's prompted you to want to go? Is there a friend who could go with you for morale support if you're nervous? Hope you go and that you enjoy it if you do!

traceface: I've just moved to a village so don't really know if anyone is a church goer.
I suppose the reason asking if I'd be 'welcome' is I am more familiar with the catholic faith which IME insist of much more promise/commitment and I suppose proof that you are faithful right from the beginning.
My dads and atheist my mum is a faithful catholic. I spent a little time at a catholic school.
Although always had a belief in God and have read the Bible (I've also read the Koran and Buddist texts) but felt conflict in that I didn't feel i belong to the catholic church.

So I got on with life and ignored the fact that i felt something was missing in my life. Insisting that if God is real I want 'Proof'

The past few months it's been on my mind more and more.
Last month we were on a very dangerous road. I actually had a really bad feeling of foreboaring and preyed to God to keep us safe (much to my DH amusment!) 5 minutes later we were almost in a high speed head on collision above a rather large hill coming around a corner. At the very last second the driver manged to pull away, he was in the wrong side he was so close I could see every wrinkle on his face. I honestly believe if he had crashed into us we would all be dead. I feel now I've had my Proof.
I probably sound mad be seriously you had to be there even DH was like Then asked If I could prey for the lottery numbers.

I will let everyone know how I get on.

sleepyeyes that's amazing! Sounds like God wanted to get your attention! Really hope you get on well this morning. You might find you make some new village friends too . Looking forward to hearing about it (in an interested way, not a crazy-stalker-invading-your-life way!)

Update: Didn't mange to go this morning, assumed there would be an evening service but their website says they only have a service on Sunday mornings.
Not sure if I should wait till next week or go find a church in a neighboring village.

Hello sleepyeyes, that's an amazing story! Don't worry God doesn't always chose to get our attention in such dramatic near death situations .

I hope you find a church that is friendly and welcoming and, above all, I pray that you will meet up with God there for yourself (safely!). Of course you don't have to wait until you can get to a church service either ... you can continue to try and get to know God by reading the bible again (one of the Gospels maybe) and praying. Or if you are near a Christian bookshop you could ask for a book that would help you learn more about God and becoming a Christian and how to develop a relationship with him yourself. God promises in the bible that if you seek him you will find him.

On a practical note you could Google for a list of churches in your area. Then you can see if the church has a website and find out a bit more about the kind of services they have. You may find that there is a small Christian fellowship (which might be more your cup of tea maybe) meeting in a local school or you might come across a church that you hadn't spotted because it's in a road you don't drive down. I guess it depends where you would feel comfortable. Personally I am not a very ordered structured person so I feel more at home in more informal church like a Baptist church or an evangelical non-denomination church rather than a formal C of E or Catholic kind of environment. But every church varies even within one denomination so if you don't feel comfortable at one service try a different church or go back another week and see if you feel differently. Anyway I'm probably confusing you sorry.

Wherever you go I hope you find peace and unconditional love and acceptance and whatever is missing from your life like you describe; a wholeness perhaps. Let us know how you get on

Copycat thank you for your reply and lovely words, glad to here God isn't always so dramatic.
I'm certain I have met with people from the Christian Fellowship through high School years ago, they were lovely and very helpful. So I think I will look out for them.
It might be best I try another church if our one only has one service a week, I might be better with somewhere with evening services. On the other hand I really like the idea of our village church and getting involved with the community.

I do a have a bible somewhere must look it out, I am out well versed in the bible (have spent a year catholic high school where we were drilled in it 3 hours a week) and biblical stories. Although non-practicing I've had quite a bit of religious teachings in my life and I chose R.E and Philosophy as high school subjects. But your right probably would be a good idea to pop into town and find a Wesley Owens and do a bit of reading up on how to be an active Christian.

I feel so relaxed and at peace now I've made a firm decision.

As a young Christian family church is the most important part of our life. It's really exciting to hear about other families who want to get to know such an awesome God.
Regards finding a church most of them have websites now or are listed in local papers. The welcome you receive on the door may vary, but i suggest if the welcome isn't warm they are obviously missing the point! Any church should welcome everyone.
Alot of churches have small homegroups too, they are basically mid week church in a small grp in someones house. I run a homegrp for young mums who can't get to evening meetings & of course the kids come along too.
Hope u find what u r looking for

Hello again sleepyeyes
Sorry you didn't make it to a service. I agree totally with Copycat about finding a church. I have certainly been in churches where I haven't felt 'at home' and have kept looking until I found one that did. And the small group thing is a great idea too. I go to a midweek group on a Tuesday morning which is for mums and kidddies - easier for us than getting out in the evening. What is your DH's stand on it all? Is he going to go with you?
I take it you're in Scotland (I am Poirot!) - I have a few Christian friends up there (!) so if you wanted to say where you live I could see if any of them could suggest anywhere for you?
Hope you're well - keep praying and expecting God to answer! I'm very excited for you and your family

catherineseiont: Thanks for your reply we don't have any children yet, TTC, but homegroups sound like a nice informal way of getting to know people.

traceface: I live in Midlothian, pretty close to Edinburgh.

My DH well he would say he is an atheist but lately has been sounding less skeptical, and is supportive of me joining a church.
We don't have children yet but we have discussed in great detail (being that they are taking a while to come! Plus I work in childcare) how we would like to raise any we might have. While he wouldn't like them to go to a church school or attend sunday school he is happy for them to be raised within a church as long as they are happy to go and their is no pressure. As he sees it there is less moral and traditional values in todays society and being part of a church may give them moral guidance and support during difficult times then he can see it as being a positive part of our family life.

I have a lot of spare time at the moment and hope which the churches help I can give back as much as I take.

last sentence I meant WITH instead of WHICH.

last sentence I meant WITH instead of WHICH.

last sentence I meant WITH instead of WHICH.

It's good that you've discussed these things with DH before you have children, as it's important to understand each other's point of view and reach a general agreement about how you're going to raise them.

One thing though, most children who attend church will go to "Sunday school", or as they tend to be called these days "childrens groups" for part of the service, as that means they can learn about Christianity in their own way, rather than sitting through a sermon aimed at adults which will bore them and likely leave them fidgety and disuptive. So, while I can understand him not wanting a faith school, Sunday school is a normal part of church for most children of church-going families.

Hello again sleepyeyes. My Mum had a strong Catholic upbringing and my sister and I were christened Catholic; my sister has always pursued her faith through the Catholic church and finds that she meets with God through the beautiful latin script, liturgy and choral music, traditional hymns, gregorian chants etc. I can't relate to formal high-church worship so well myself, I much prefer praise and worship in a more modern setting with drums, guitars etc (and so do my DC). But both my sister and I share the same fundamental beliefs and feel privileged to know the love, presence and power of God in our daily lives even though we have found quite different ways of approaching God and responding to Him and have very different spiritual bases. As I said before I am quite a chaotic person so I prefer a more relaxed and informal church service.

What I'm taking a long time to say is that you can find God as you are and in a church that suits you, you don't need to change and be a different person first. I always think that Christianity is simply about having a relationship with God and not about following a set of rules, conforming or behaving in a certain way - although once you start to get to know Him and His word your behaviour/attitudes/motivations etc most probably will change in response to what you learn and discover. God loves you right now, just as you are but He wants each one of us to make a personal response to Him and place our life in His hands and kind of start a new life with Him. It sounds like you have already made that decision. At the heart of the Christian message is this individual need for repentence and receiving the gift of a 'new life'. As you have studied the bible I'm sure you also understand that Jesus' death and sacrifice is central to receiving God's love, grace and forgiveness. Sorry I've rambled on there quite a bit; I warned you that I live (and even write) in a bit of a muddle most of the time!

On a slightly different note, I too studied Religious Studies before I became a Christian but only to O Level (yikes that exposes my age!) and I knew the Gospel of Luke inside out from an academic viewpoint. However when I read Luke again after becoming a Christian when I was 18 it was like I'd never read it before! The bible is God's living word to us so to speak, not just a history book, and if you pick it up now to read (just take small bites) with faith stirring in your heart then I'm sure God will speak to you through it.

It's a real encouragement to hear that God is speaking into your life and I pray that you will know His peace, love and joy in increasing measure in the coming days

AMumInScotland thanks for that I didn't know that so at least we cant discus it now. But he was very clear NO sunday school, but then he is thinking of an old fashioned sunday school maybe showing him times have changed he will change his mind.
The only other thing he has mentioned is he would be unhappy if a joined a church that was run by creationist and the children were taught Evolution is fiction, I'm wondering if this is what he thinks happens at Sunday school.
Which is fine I would never join a church like that anyway, plus I had extensive discussions with my old R.E teacher on how people can interpret parts of the bible to fit their own agenda and that Genesis can be viewed as a biblical version of Evolution. He seamed happy with that.

Copycat that's interesting what you say about reading the bible through christian eyes, I was reading parts of the bible online today and thats exactly how I felt instead of seeing it as stories and moral teachings for the first time I saw how it relates to my life and how that following it can improve my life. It really was very unexpected, but lovely all the same.

I must admit the Catholics in my family as VERY devout Roman catholics I can see them being a bit horrified (except my mum who believes religion is personal experience) and trying to convert me. But it was their own priest who finally turn me off Catholicism when during my Grans funeral the priest took the time to rant against non-catholics and how only Catholics go to heaven and much more knowing full well her Granddaughters weren't catholic. My BIL (never been inside a church or chapel before) was routed to the spot terrified and had nightmares afterwards!
Still during a hard time it gave my sister and I something to laugh about as my Gran was in no way a devout catholic and hated people like him, she would have been the first to stand up and walk out taking the time to call him a few choice names.

Well, once you've found a church you think has potential, you can find out what they do for children, and discuss it with him when the time comes. They often have a creche for the smallest age-group, which lets you focus on the service, then they move up to other childrens groups where they'll do their own thing with a story and colouring and songs etc. If he sees what it's like and maybe even talks to the people who look after the groups he'll probably feel reassured that it's not any "heavier" than them being in church at all. But if he's not happy, then you can always reach some kind of agreement about what and how much exposure to the church he's happy with, and how you can all make that work.

As to creationism, I don't think it's mainstream in Church of Scotland, but they do vary a bit depending on the minister and the local congregation, but you'll get a feel for them if you go a few times, and that should give you an idea whether they are teaching things that you can agree with.

Hi Sleepyeyes Really excited to hear that God is reached down and snapping his fingers to get your attention and prove just how much he loves you. Have no other terribly helpful advice to offer that AMiS and Trace and Copycat haven't already suggested but just wanted to encourage you to stick with your decision to go to church / find God / become Christian (delete as applicable) Don't let day to day life crowd out something this precious! Hope to hear you have a really great experience of it on Sunday.

Might also be worth googling to see if a church in your area runs an alpha course. These are much less formal than a church service usually, and you can ask questions and discuss what you believe. There are usually more atheists than christians there too, so you don't need to feel embarrassed to say that you don't know what you believe.

If you are lucky they sometimes throw in a free lunch or dinner

sleepyeyes - did you find anywhere to go today? Was thinking of you this morning Have you been reading the Bible or talking to God at all? I hope you're still seeking and starting to find some answers xxx