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Original poster

Holy Communion Question.

42 replies

Stuffed · 12/04/2009 20:31

DH and I have a friend was Christened (Catholic) but never his First Holy Communion as a child. DH and I knew this (can't remember how it came about now) then saw him taking communion during mass one Sunday. We asked him about it, and he said it seemed "rude not too". At the time we had a chuckle about it; we were having lunch with a glass of wine. I didn't really think that much more about it.

Then today - I went to Mass with DH and DC's. We took DC's up for a blessing.-

Some background Info;DH and I were married in a Civil ceramony - We had already had DC1, and DH felt too embarrassed to go to the priest and ask to get married in church - esepecially as he hadn't attended for years. -

Anyway - DH was carrying DC3, and took communion from the priest. I was as I understood DH couldn't do this due, to our civil wedding? Am I wrong? Is DH actualy ex-communicated?

When I asked DH about it he said "Well X does, and I was holing DC3 so I couldn't cross my arms".

Has he commited a massive sin.(TBH - personally don't think he has)

Sorry I'm not Catholic myself, so don't know about these things.

OP posts:
Milliways · 12/04/2009 20:41

We are not catholic, but are christian, and our church says that ANYONE who knows and loved the Lord is welcome to take part in communion.

At our church it is passed from person to person, and you just let it pass if you are not sure/do not wish to partake. It is a matter between you and God.

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 20:54

That sounds nice

OP posts:
Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 21:30

No Catholics around?

OP posts:
cariboo · 12/04/2009 21:41

I'm not catholic but dh & dcs are. Dh says I can't take communion (I'm CoE & confirmed) but I say nonsense! & if he wants me to continue accompanying him & dc to mass, he'd better keep quiet!

However I made a massive faux pas today. It was the 1st time for me that both communion wafer & wine were offered in catholic mass. I wasn't paying attention & bent down to drink from chalice (as one does in CoE) & was hideously embarrassed when I realised that this is not done in Catholic mass - you're meant to dip the wafer in the wine. I wanted to vanish in a puff of smoke - the shame! At least my MIL wasn't there - she'd have had a fit!

Pinkfluffyslippers · 12/04/2009 21:44

From what little I know - I think most Catholic churches don't mind if anyone baptised accepts communion. It used to be that if you were C of E you couldn't accept communion in a Catholic church and vice versa. Now I think it's fine that anyone goes up and if you cross your arms then you get a blessing. Obviously for kids until they receive their first communion or confirmation then I think they just get a blessing. I know of Catholics who are divorced and won't take communion (because of their own beliefs - not the Church). I stand to be corrected on any of the above..... as I'm only a baptised Catholic not a practising one.

Personally when it comes to these type of questions I'm always left thinking - would Jesus really be hung up on the small print of doctrine or would he see more of the BIG picture.

cariboo · 12/04/2009 21:45

I completely & absolutely agree with you, pinkslips!

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 21:45

Well the Catholic church we go to give you wine from the chalice. Never heard of wafer dipping, TBH!

OP posts:
differentEggD · 12/04/2009 21:46

wafer-dipping? Never heard of it!

cariboo · 12/04/2009 21:48

oh, thank God! must be some Swiss peculiarity...

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 21:50

Sorry - X-posted there.

So - iff you are divorced or not married in a Catholic church you're not ex-communicated?

OP posts:
cariboo · 12/04/2009 21:51

how d'you get excommunicated? bolt of lightening?

differentEggD · 12/04/2009 21:56

If I remmeber correctly, the the church will view your marrigae as not strictly Catholic if it wasn't at least blessed, therefore even should you divorce he would still be able to recieve Communion. Had you had a Church wedding and then you divorce he would not be able to take communion, but as it stands he can. If that makes any sense.

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 22:02

So what about taking First Holy Communion? Does it have to be official - or can you just take it upon yourself, like our friend?

OP posts:
differentEggD · 12/04/2009 22:09

As long as dh made his First communion/ was confirmed, then there's no real issue with taking Communion although if he wants to take it regularly I think some priests might like him to attend confession/ Sacrament of reconciliation or penance as it was once known.

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 22:17

DH isn't confirmed - Oh blimey!

OP posts:
differentEggD · 12/04/2009 22:18

did he make his fist communion?

differentEggD · 12/04/2009 22:19

sorry first communion?

Pinkfluffyslippers · 12/04/2009 22:21

To get excommunicated you have to do something really bad. According to the list on Wikipeida those who have been excommunicated range from Henry VIII (who was excommunicated for setting up his own church but NOT executing wives) to the more recent naughty bishops who've consecrated MARRIED priests as bishops.

Worth having a look at:
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_people_excommunicated_by_the_Roman_Catholic_Church#21st_centu ry

Finally - I think people believe the Catholic church is much more conservative than it really is. As with all churches there are liberal and conservative churches operating in the community. I went to a Catholic church in the 70's where mothers were always breast feeding in the front row of the pews. (V liberal - and v embarrassing for us kids.) But there are other Catholic churches in the same city which are v traditional and where even now - you wouldn't dream of breastfeeding in the same street let alone the front pew.!!.

mrswoolf · 12/04/2009 22:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cariboo · 12/04/2009 22:29

right! this is what REALLY gets to me about catholicism. It's nuts. I'm sorry but it just doesn't make any sense at all, if you can consider religion/faith as sensible...

Pinkfluffyslippers · 12/04/2009 22:29

Do you think we could find a priest to answer all our questions ? Is there are an online priest service we could log onto? Just thought !!

cariboo · 12/04/2009 22:33

never! you'd never ever ever get a straight answer.

TartanKnickers · 12/04/2009 22:37

This link explains who can and cannot receive HC

Original poster
Stuffed · 12/04/2009 22:37

DH took his First HolyCommunion - but our firend didn't he's just Christened.

DH stopped going to mass shortly after his FHC, as the priest came to the house to ask his parents why they only had two children. They were annoyed and stopped going to church.

OP posts:
Pinkfluffyslippers · 12/04/2009 22:41

Stuffed.... I think you'd better talk this through with your priest. He'll hopefully come up with a good answer.

Cariboo... I love the idea of dipping wafers it seems so odd!

NIght night all.