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Philosophy/religion

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Original poster

Catholics- question please r.e. converting

86 replies

JohnnyTwoHats · 25/02/2009 10:32

I have been considering Catholicism for a while- it seems to be the religion which most closely aligns with my beliefs. I used to go to a C of E church and both myself and my DD (5, nearly 6) are baptised C of E. I know there are RCIA classes in my parish but I'm worried about how I might be recieved as a single mother (long story, accidental pregnancy, resisted abortion due to my belief that it was inherrently a wrong thing to do).

Would there be an issue around this?

OP posts:

MaryBSearchingForaJob · 25/02/2009 13:24

I would go with the friend, rather than your new man, saves confusion!

DumbledoresGirl · 25/02/2009 13:24

Oh yes that sounds a better idea. I wouldn't have suggested new man if I thought he was going to complicate matters. Ask your friend instead.

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 25/02/2009 13:40

Yes, I only just thought on about that really regarding DD but i deffo think it would be slightly weird if she was with me.

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Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 25/02/2009 17:03

Thank you all for your helpful suggestions and advice, ladies. No doubt I will be back for more advice/info soon! I have spoken to my lovely friend who is going to take me tomorrow morning to church to light a candle, then (she lives in a different parish) i have asked another friend if i can tag along with her to mass one day. I don't think she goes particularly regularly but am hoping she will go soon for my sake. Haven't heard back from her yet but am hopeful.

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AbbyLubber · 25/02/2009 17:58

Welcome from an RC Mumsnetter. Johnny, that all sounds absolutely lovely. I hope your friend comes through for you, but if she doesn't, I'd jsut go. No-one will notice if you kneel at the wrong time etc. I think every RC church would welcome you and no-one would even think about your marital circs. And my church would really welcome your dd too. Generally we're very tolerant of children of any age. My own dd just adores the May Day parties we have for Our Lady, where she gets to scatter flowers...

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 25/02/2009 19:21

Right. My other RC friend rang about half an hour ago and she is taking me on Sunday evening to 6.30 mass, as that's the one her mum will be at and she wants her mum to introduce me to priest and other folks. She was v positive about it actually, said she hadn't been for a while and she wanted to.

Am really excited now!

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DumbledoresGirl · 25/02/2009 20:07

That sounds fantastic. You have already got a foot in the door with a personal introduction to the priest. And the Sunday evening Mass is my favourite - so calming and reflective (actually, it is just the same as any other Sunday Mass, but the time of day seems to make the difference). Enjoy it, and I hope you come back and tell us how it went.

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 25/02/2009 20:11

I definitely will report back. Am really looking forward to it, is like a weight off my mind already!

OP posts:

MaryBSearchingForaJob · 25/02/2009 20:48

AbbyLubber · 26/02/2009 15:35

Wonderful, Johnny.

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 26/02/2009 16:26

Hmm, church was closed when we went this afternoon. I think it's really sad that the church has to be locked in case people steal stuff (presuming that's why).

I feel like I want to go there now, it's feeling very difficult to wait until Sunday evening now I have made the step in my own mind and I am drawn to it. I had a good discussion about the subject with some friends who came round for dinner last night, which was nice. One a semi-practising R.C, one C/E but went to catholic school and one out and out atheist. It was nice because it challenged me to examine my reasons for wanting to 'enquire' about Catholicism.

Anyway they were all very supportive.

OP posts:

Jaamy · 26/02/2009 22:47

JTH - give the presbetery (priest's house) a call. you'll find the number in the yellow pages. They'll be able to tell you when the church is open or when you can call round to the presbetery for a bulletin or leaflet which will let you know everything that is going on in the parish.

Yes, it is very sad that churches are generally left locked up outside of services. IME there is usually a morning mass about 9am and sometimes funerals or special services at around 12. Sometimes there are rosaries or other prayers in the afternoon. Often priests (because there are so few of them now ) also have responsibility for a nearby hospital or rest home or schools so can't always be around during the day.

I hope you enjoy the time you spend at church and with your new 'family'.

MaryBS · 27/02/2009 07:24

Its not just stealing, its the vandalism . I'm fortunate in that I'm a keyholder to our church and can open it whenever I want.

Ironically it would probably have been open on Wednesday as it was Ash Wednesday.

Glad your friends are being supportive, and also how they've helped affirm your belief that this is right for you!

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 01/03/2009 20:11

Update on this- just returned from mass. I had a really disappointed moment this afternoon when my friend cried off because she was too tired. But, i decided to go anyway and it was wonderful! We went up for a blessing in the end, was undecided but did at the last moment. I felt so peaceful and more connected to God than I ever have before.
I spoke to the priest on the way out who invited me to the RCIA class on Tuesday, he was very welcoming and lovely.

Thank you all for your encouragement and advice, am so glad I stopped procrastinating and went.

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DumbledoresGirl · 01/03/2009 20:20

So happy for you JTH. Was thinking about you earlier and came searching for this thread. Will you be going back to Mass next week too?

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 01/03/2009 22:41

Yes, but I think I will go to 9.30am mass with dd so she can have the children's liturgy. She loved it, but I think she needs something on her level. The priest mentioned that because she isn't at a catholic school, she would be able to have one to one instruction, but not sure about the details.

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Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 01/03/2009 22:43

And another thing- my friend just forwarded an email from the priest to her mum saying how brave i was to go on my own and generally v encouraging!

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MaryBS · 02/03/2009 07:23

That's fantastic JTH, and what a cool priest!

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 03/03/2009 13:08

First RCIA class tonight- arrgh! Does anyone have any idea how long it's likely to last? I forgot to ask!

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MaryBS · 03/03/2009 18:39

Until you get the answers right

sorry, no idea...

Tommy · 03/03/2009 21:46

I think our RCIA group runs from September to Easter - so 8 months or so.

Or did you mean time wise? 2 hours max

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 04/03/2009 15:27

I meant time wise, lol!

It was about an hour and a half, anyway. Very interesting, brought back memories of my A level Religious studies and form criticism etc as we were looking at the Transfiguration in all three of the synoptic gospels and discussing it. Everyone was very friendly, nobody bit me(one of the older catechists fell asleep half way through though, lol). So I will be going back next week providing i have a babysitter, and going back to mass on Sunday.
Although, i did have a couple of questions- i noticed people blessing themselves with the holy water as they came into the church- is that something everybody does? for example would myself and dd do it too? or is it only for those in full communion with the church?
Similarly I noticed people genuflecting to the front before they sat down- what is that about? Do we need to be doing that?

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MARGOsBeenPlayingWithMyNooNoo · 04/03/2009 15:44

We were alway taught to bless ourselves on entry and exit from mass - and also taught to genuflect in front of the tabernacle each time you enter/leave the pews (except at communion)

Not everyone does this anymore.

You're very brave, my DH is considering converting and has been going to classes too.

Original poster

JohnnyTwoHats · 04/03/2009 15:52

So we should then? thanks. Don't feel brave- it all seems very scary still.

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mosschops30 · 04/03/2009 16:03

I converted about 3 years ago. Like you had attended a C of E school and was baptised C of E. dd was also baptised C of E.
However I sent her to Catholic school then and wanted to convert and also went on a couple of retreats at Worth Abbey (well worth it, they run weekends for people thinking about catholicism, and all sorts of other things. Its not as weird as it sounds and full of normal people from every walk of life you could imagine and Ive made some good friends there including one of the monks!).

Anyway I went to one of those RCIA classes and it was all too weird for me, the people were kind of old, I had nothing in common with anyone and just felt a bit happy clappy come and share type of thing. I spoke to my local priest and he said he would give me instruction, which we did for about a year then I took my communion and was confirmed. dd was then accepted into the catholic church, a re-baptism wasnt necessary and she then took her first holy communion.

Hope I havent waffled too much, if you need any more info let me know

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