Lapsed Catholic starting up again - need help with Mass!

[BoobyRuby]

Hope someone can help me - I have recently starting going to church again after a long time away - was brought up RC and spent my twenties not that interested but have recently been wanting to attend Mass more and more. I've found a lovely Catholic church in my neighbourhood and have started going every sunday but can't remember a few things and am too shy to ask!

If I wanted to take communion (not ready to yet) is there something I need to do at the beginning of the mass with my wafer?

Also, I remember most of the mass but there are some bits I can't remember - is there anywhere online I can download the responses etc?

Thanks - sorry if this sounds a bit silly

go to confession first ! I bet you'll find all the responses flooding back..it happens to me whenever I go to Mass and I'm terribly lapsed

thanks MaryAnn, do I speak with the priest about confession after Mass, or how does it work these days? It seems there are a few differences from the RC masses I used to attend...

You might want to catch him at a less busy/more private time, but yes you could ask him after mass. Is there nothing in a newsletter or on a church noticeboard about confessions? If not, then phone him up and ask him. Just say you're lapsed RC, but you've started going to church again, would like to make your confession before receiving communion.

thank you!

This might help:

Mass structure

Don't fret too much about responses. No rush. Our RC church is full of poles and hispanics who don't know enough English to respond, and that's FINE. In fact it's lovely.

Some churches have a plate of wafers near the entrance and you pick one out and drop it in a chalice or similar. Most don't have this.

You're being really brave to come back. Welcome! I was lapsed for aeons too.

Like you, I spent most of my 20s lapsed (we only ever talk about 'lapsed Catholics', you never hear of a 'lapsed Anglican', do you?).

I found most of it came back to me unsettlingly quickly. I go up and take Communion without any change to the normal routine, but I've noticed in school Masses that any of the children who are non-RC, or some who haven't made their First Communion yet go up with their arms crossed across their chests to indicate they just want a blessing.

But if the church you've found is as friendly as you say, I think it would be fine to catch your priest after Mass and say hello, and explain you've recently returned to the Church. He'll probably be delighted.

You can get some simplified mass books for children, which are quite good at getting across the important bits, particularly the responses and prayers that stay the same from week to week.

I remember that moving the wafer from one bowl to another things as a child in other European countries, but I've never encountered it in the UK.

I'm fairly new to the catholic church and still feel nervous when I go to confession. I agree with misshardbroom your priest will be delighted to help you. They are much more human than we think.

I'm a cradle Catholic and still stumble over confession - mainly because I only know one really short actof contrition and always feel a bit of a sloth for not learning somehting more adult . But it's so lovely when you've done it - bit like cleaning out the fridge...

completely forgot the act of contrition - my goodness, I have a lot to catch up with...

I've just wikipedia'd act of contrition and it doesn't have the one I know (which admittedly is v v short and learnt in school)- can I still say this one you think?

I think you can say what works for you . Is this 'O my God, because you are so good, I am very sorry...' That's the one I often say on grounds that it makes me childlike

I sometimes use the Memorare - 'Remember, O most loving Virgin Mary'. Googling for that should work. If not, I'll post it. It's a good comforting one. Or you can just say the Jesus prayer - Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on me.

But I don't think you should worry too much. It's quite fun learning new prayers and reencountering old ones.

If you are an Anglican and go to confession you get given random bits of paper (whichever happens to be the Priest's favourite at the time) with the Priest's bits and your bits, including an act of contrition written down - these are actually very helpful as you don't have to remember prayers as you can read them. Your Priest could probably find you something similar if you ask him.

I was told by one of the Brothers at Worth Abbey that there's no such thing as a lapsed Catholic - just "resting".

If you ever get a chance - go to Worth Abbey, they do lovely retreats and they have special family retreats.
I went once (I'm a well rested Catholic) with my 2 year old and they were so welcoming and everyone had a great time.
Just a thought.....

I'm rested and dormant

What is this about Anglicans going to confession?

Its true! Our Anglican priest hears confessions! Whether anyone actually goes to him is a different matter... knowing I was ex-RC meant he was always nagging me to go to confession, but I told him I had "brown box syndrome". Not only that, because he is now technically my boss, he won't hear my confession anyway - probably afraid of what I might confess!

We'll, you learn something new every day!

I have never ever noticed a confession box in an Anglican church.

I went to confession after about 20 years and told the priest I couldn't remember what I had to say, so he told me the act of contrition then - and it was short.

Only got one Our Father too

Most Anglican churches do not have confessional boxes - although some do (St Bartholomew's Brighton has enormous ones: www.stbartholomewsbrighton.org.uk/welcome.htm )
The usual Anglican way is for the Priest to sit and the penitent to either kneel or sit next to them.

Yes, most Anglican churches don't have confessional boxes.

You can go to a penitential service for absolution too if you can't face confession.
Re looking for the act of contrition online - sometimes it's called 'act of sorrow'
I know one that goes:
'Oh my God because you are so good I am very sorry that I have sinned against you and I will not sin again. Amen'
But that one is a bit child=like - I'm sure there's a better one.

Sorry - Just realised Joanna Lumley also mentioned this prayer (serves me right for scanning and not reading)