I want a religion - who will have me?

[Trickcyclist]

Hi
Does anyone have advice on this....
I would describe myself as spiritual / religious and I want to find a "religious home" but I don't know which religion to go for. I have 1dd and I don't know what direction to point her in, plus my husband is a confirmed aetheist.

I'm a baptised Catholic but too many things I disagree with - fundamentally and I
Christianity - seems good but I don't believe Jesus was the son of God/ trinity / resurrection. (bit of a problem)
Quakers - good people but they don't sing.
Judaism - all Jews have a good sense of humour - but I have problems re: state of Israel.Plus they don't accept converts v easily.
Islam - too many restrictions,but I'm full of admiration for anyone who observes Ramadan.
Buddhism - don't know enough about it. I believe in God - and I'm not sure B's do.

All suggestions welcome....

Thanks

You need the Belief-o-matic on Beliefnet, I think... a quiz that asks you all sorts of religious questions and then makes suggestions about which religious appraoc would suit you best...

Catholicism's fun. No one follows all the rules and your DD will get a communion dress!

Do you want to be part of a religious community?

Thanks for the suggestions, I've done the Belief-O-Matic questionnaire and the result of this unscientific survey were amusing:
No.1 =- Neo Pagan (what's that?)

1. Liberal Quaker

followed by variations of buddhism and reform judaism. and then last but by no means least at no; 25 Roman Catholicism!

neo-Pagan is basically modern paganism - you could maybe look up Druids, Wicca etc.

How important is it that there's a god or invisible friend involved? Basically are you looking for a faith or a philosophy?

Because if you don't need the 'higher power' bit, try humanism - or buddhism (though I am not keen on that one myself, bit misogynistic).

I think solidgoldstiffingballs makes a good point. The distinction is faith vs philosophy vs 'somewhere to belong' as fivesetsofschoolfees pointed out.

If you are looking for the latter two then religion might help but you run the risk of feeling a bit hypocritical. I loved the catholic rituals growing up and the sense of community that came from being a member of the church - but on a faith basis it wasn't right for me. I started where you are now about 8 years ago and although I tried really hard to 'make' myself a christian I couldn't believe Jesus was divine and as you say, that is a bit of a sticking point.

If you are talking about God then a good starting place is to learn about the different religion's core beliefs and see if any ring true for you. You don't need to agree with all the teachings or what its followers do in it's name. You following a religion is about you being close to god - not what anyone else is doing. I'm a muslim but would follow the same 'restrictions' in judaism or christianity because they make sense to me and I choose to. How practicing I am fluctuates, I don't miss my prayers, drink or eat pork but sometimes I'm a terrible gossip and I have even been known to lie occasionally I'm working on it - nonw of us are perfect! One of my jewish friends and I always joke that I wouldn't want to do her fasts (25 hours but one day)and she wouldn't want to do mine (dawn to dusk but 30days! . Judaism is an excuse for Israel not a reason for the violence and there are many many Jews that disagree with what is happening over there.

When I was searching, a christian friend told me to pray - to ask God to guide me where HE wanted me to go. To this day they wish He had given me a different answer but she says she is glad he answered me.

P.S beliefnet is funny but I found it unhelpful.

the bbc religion pages are pretty good for an overview
www.bbc.co.uk/religion/

Ummadam thank you for your v detailed reply. I will definitely heed your advice. I wish I had had such a wise head on my shoulders when I was your age.

I'm really grateful for everyone taking the time to help me on this matter. Ever since posting yesterday I've felt a great weight has been lifted from my shoulders.

Having read more about the Quakers I think I'll probably end up with them, since they're so wonderfully accommodating. (I read that you can be an aetheist Quaker!)
.
I know my journey has only just started but I'm sure it'll be fun getting to the destination wherever that may be.

Thanks again

I think you should go with the Quakers - but pop along to Mass every now and then when you fancy a bit of singing.

I have taken the belief-o-mat quiz thingy.

Aparently I'm 100% Liberal Quaker.

My mother will be thrilled as I was bought up in a Quaker family and went to a Quaker school.

Every sunday I drag my DC's to Catholic Mass, though.

trickcyclist i have solved the need a religion/also like to sing problem by 1/ starting to go along to my local (liberal, lovely, welcoming) quaker group AND 2/joining a community choir! works for me

I guess a question is "what do you want from this experience - a sense of community, a sense of peace, a sense of fulfilment, ultimate answers, a place in heaven, a way to do charitable things with more purpose"...what are your hopes for a faith?

.....

Don't over look the Unitarians - they sing and each belive what they like - just need a few more of us but I think there are some big congregations in London

Thanks for the suggestion Nettee, I may well give them a go.

BTW - I've changed my nick name to Allwillbewell as I'm feeling rather positive about life these days!

Happy New Year