Christening

[youcannotbeserious]

OK, need some opinions on this please:

I am a (non practicing) catholic. DH is completely agnostic.
My family are VERY strong Irish catholics and it means a lot to them.

Our DS is now 4 weeks old and I would like to have him Christened.... DH would probably be OK with a catholic christening, I would like it and it would mean a lot to my side of the family....

But, DH would definitely not be OK with bringing DS as a practising catholic...

So, am I being unreasonable to be thinking of having my son christened when we won't really practice the religion?

My DW is a Catholic and I'm Hindu. We have DS (12months old). We have just finished the lessons for baptism and I have to say I was quite impressed at the welcoming atmosphere. I was up front about my religion (after all I did get married in the same church). I felt I could be quite open. In terms of bringing DS up as a practising Catholic. No problems with it. When I attend church I can appreciate the community. He will also receive a Hindu blessing (I am keen he has an understanding when he is older as this is part of his Heritage).

However, I know that from my experience I cannot see how being brought as a Catholic differs from everyday normal moral values. We don't pray every night, we're not into self flagellation or other weird rituals. I must say I don't really know what 'being brought up as a catholic' means. I know there are other rites of passage etc. Fine but I don't see it 'interfering' with normal life.

When our DS reaches an age of maturity he can decide his spiritual path or not - it will be up to him.

But the Sister did point out 'are you asking for baptism (for your child) because it is expected by the extended family?' It ain't a good thing in the Churches eyes (but who will know). You may find yourself having to lie in the baptism classes. Could you really do that?

The question remains - what does baptism mean to you and your child? (Un-baptised children will not be in limbo or anything) Why do it if you have no intention of following a spiritual path?

You have to make promises as a parent or godparent. Are you able to make those promises and comply with your DH's wishes?

What is it about practicing the Catholic faith that your DH objects to?

You didn't say whether you'd discussed it with dh. For all you know he might take the same view as you. He might think a Catholic ceremony is fine. In which case there's no problem.

You didn't say whether you'd discussed it with dh. For all you know he might take the same view as you. He might think a Catholic ceremony is fine. In which case there's no problem.

I've said this on a couple of similar threads lately, but I'll say it again anyway

I think the best thing to do is to check out the words of the service that you would be using (they're probably available online) and decide whether you can say them in church without feeling hypocritical.

What people mean by faith, and belief, and bringing your child up as a catholic etc can be very varied, and you might both be happy that what you would say in the service would be completely honest. You could also find that you are fine with it yourself but that DH would not be happy to say those things (but be ok with you saying them IYSWIM) in which case he could choose not to be included in that part. I'm sure clergy would understand that and prefer him to be honest.

If you can't say the words and mean them, then I personally don't think you should do it just for family, but have a blessing instead