Please help how to explain religion to my DD (when the time comes)

[LuckySalem]

I have a problem.

I am really anti religion But I want my DD to make her own choice when she is old enough (she's only 5 months old now so will be a while lol)

I don't know how to explain god to someone without being prejudice.

Please help.

I dont know any believers. All the people I know (whether consiously or not) don't go church etc. Even my older relatives are the same.

Ok thanks. I'll try that.

I'm just so worried about passing on all my things to her that she won't have her own.

I don't want to make her a non-believer same as I don't want her to have my needle phobia.

Thanks again.

'Some people believe xxxx. Some don't. I don't, but [by then she will no doubt be at pre-school or school, so you can name someone she comes into contact with there] does.'

ds1 (3yo) hasn't asked yet, but we (me = practising CofE, dh = humanist) are going to tackle it along these lines.

Thanks berolina. I know what CofE is but what are humanists?

'Remember how you had imaginary friends when yiou were little, well lots of grownups have them too. and its not polite to laugh at them.@

Madamez - I take it you are NOT relgious at all then.

How very dare you, I am a Pastafarian

Actually, you could frame it in terms of 'special' and 'important' stories, like Father Christmas and any classical mythology or fairy tales she has encountered, and explain that these are stories that are ways of looking at the world and different stories are important to different people. You don;t actually have to bring in the concept of invisible imaginary friends at all.

I can see that you want to be fair about this and I admire that, but I do wonder how appropriate it is this case. If it were that you loved football, but felt your DD might prefer rugby I can see that. Deep down you would know that football isn't intrinsically better than rugby.

But if you are not religious then you believe that it's all false. Why would you want to encourage that?

Not to be mean (because as I say I admire the fair minded intent) but would you give the BNP and racism a fair chance too?

My DS is four and a half, and as neither DH or I are religious, he hasn't mentioned it yet - the concept of god simply doesn't figure in his life, I guess. So if you don't bring it up, you may be waiting a while for your DC to come to you with questions about religion.

I intend to tell him that there is no god, but some people believe there is, and it's very important to them, so you should respect that.

I would give the BNP and racism their own voice. If DD asked me about them I'd try my best to explain it from both points of view with an aim towards "It's not very nice" which I expect no matter how hard I try is what will come across when I speak about god. I'm going to let her decide but I expect nothing I can do will stop her getting some kind of an influence from me and as long as she doesn't choose something harmful then I have no problem.

Whether that being BNP, Christianity, hinduism etc etc or even racism. I've just got to hope that I raise her well enough to understand good and bad.

Um, I'm sure your open mindedness is coming from a good place, LuckySalem, but I think it's our job as parents to point out the ethical failings of racism/sexism/homophobia/etc. Of course you want to raise someone who thinks for herself and does not just blindly accept your viewpoint, but that doesn't mean you have to give the BNP a fair hearing. There is no fair hearing for racism.

We're raising the kids veggie, and the question I get asked most is, when your DC are old enough, will you let them choose for themselves? Which just makes me laugh, because clearly no matter what I say or think, they will choose for themselves! On every issue.

I think WRT to racism/sexism/homophobia there comes a point where you have to explain to children what the fuckwits people in question believe and then explain why it's wrong. Because if you make it the Great Unmentionable, not only could it develop a perverse attraction for DC but bigoted organisations could perhaps be able to gloss over their less appealing bits if they are not openly discussed (and derided and disproved) by other people.

Cocobear. I'm with you on the racism thing which is why I used it as an extreme example. But did you mean a fair hearing for christianity because I don't see why a non believer would want to.

mademez - Thats what I was trying to get across. LOL.

Grey - I think all religions should have a fair hearing. I don't believe there is such a thing as god as why would so many people be hurt etc etc etc. But If I was to tell DD my true thoughts on god then I'd worry that she would think religious people are silly. - I'm not very good at explaining things so I hope that doesn't come across mean.

I mean - There was something on the TV the other day about a woman who had had a car accident (wasn't particularly bad but enough for hospital) and she was constantly saying the lord was watching over me and I sat and said well you're just silly if the lord was truly watching you then you wouldn't have had the accident.

I dont' want her to have my viewpoint unless she comes to it of her own accord which is why I think religion deserves a fair hearing.

They will learn about the Greek and Egyptian myths and legends in school, so Christianity as myth and legend isn't such a huge step.

I've never quite understood this idea of "letting them make up their minds when they are older." It's the old fallacy about a yes-no argument having a 50-50 likelihood.

UQ - I dont understand what you mean. It went way over my head. can you dumb it down for me? lol

Well, when talking about religion people often have this idea that it's got to be given a "fair hearing" because you have to keep an "open mind", which you don't tend to get with, say, leprechauns or fairies.

The implication is that you must be even-handed because the odds are even. And they're not. God is very, very unlikely. That doesn't stop some people believing in him, but it's not like whether you like tomatoes or whether a coin will come up Heads or Tails.

Oh ok I understand now! lol.

Maybe i'll just ignore it and if she asks i'll tell her i don't believe in it but some people do and she's best to go and find someone who does in order to understand it?