Any Buddhist MNers

[MargoLivebetter]

I was baptised a Catholic and raised as one. I was always fairly horrified by it, even as a little girl, despite the best efforts of my family and schools to ensure I believed. I would just add here that I don't have any issue with people who are Catholics or any other religion. We are all on our own paths and I'm fine with whatever other people want to believe, as long as it doesn't infringe on me or anyone else trying to follow their own path.

I lapsed in my early-20s and became a fully fledged atheist at some point. Whilst I don't believe in gods or any of the monolithic type faiths or ghosts, spirits, angels or those kind of things, I do believe our consciousness makes us more than just reproducing animals. It gives us an awareness of the universe, our sense of existence and our ability to have a purpose other than just perpetuating the species biologically.

I've explored around the edges of Buddhism for years and I become increasingly drawn to it. It doesn't seem much discussed here on MN though and I wondered if there were any Buddhists about?

I've read "Buddha in Your Mirror" it's a very good book and practiced Nichiren Buddhism and agree. Very practical.
I tried Zen Buddhism from age 13-20 and it never worked. The people were quite cold too and snobbish. Nichiren Buddhists were way nicer and more open.

I've ordered Buddha in Your Mirror from eBay.

I'm currently reading Eckhart Tolle 'A New Earth', which is very good but I'm going to have to go back and read it again, as there is so much to get my head around, but it is all about trying to find the eternal consciousness within ourselves, not the thoughts of who we are. Messes with my mind a bit, but I think I am getting it.

I do find the practical application of all these things the challenge, even once I have understood them intellectually. Dealing with people who trigger negative emotions in me would be a particular challenge that I'd like to understand how better to deal with.

Be careful of overthinking, over analysing and trying to understand intellectually.

Just keep witnessing the thoughts, emotions and feelings. You will see them come and go. The witness remains.

Nichiren Buddhism offers an entirely different approach to the one mentioned by the Mysticguru. Simply chant Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo regularly, ideally twice a day to put yourself in harmony with the Universe. Sounds very bizarre but it works. As we say, one doesn't need to be a car mechanic to be able to get from A to B by car. Regular chanting is the way to go in Nichiren Buddhism. Some people including me visualise our goals. Some people say let your mind wonder. More on Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo meaning and philosophy behind it in the book. Also on SGI-UK website. Good luck exploring

Interesting on the pm front as I used to be a programme manager and now work in risk
I did this course https://zenways.org/event/breakthrough-to-zen-retreat-noddfa/
which is a 3 day intensive meditation. Can be quite brutal but very transformative. For me, the key thing is to practically work on the things you can do, but stop angsting about the things that you either can’t change or can’t know. From a pm perspective, you work on the ‘known knowns’ put risk mitigation in for the ‘known unknowns’ but the ‘unknown unknowns’ you just stop worrying about and be confident that you will be able to manage them at that moment.

there is a lot more to it than that, I feel a lot more connected, but also no longer try to control everything to work towards my expected outcomes. If life throws a curve ball (and I’ve had plenty) I roll with it
instead of working on the roadmap out into the future, I accept that every step I take has infinite possibilities from that point,and whichever one I take is the right one for me at that point.

Thank you @HidingFromDD that is interesting and very helpful.

@Kosenrufugirl half way through The Buddha in Your Mirror and loving it. Thank you very much for the recommendation. So practical and helpful and grounded in every day life.

I am glad you like the book. Thank you for the update 😁

That's not my understanding- we live with the relative 'self' and all its cares and loves and the absolute knowledge that it is all impermanent- and we accept what is in every moment. That doesn't mean we don't try and make our lives and those of whom we love better though!

And I belong to Zenways - a Rinzai Zen school of Buddhism - mentioned by the previous poster

I know I've bumped the thread but didn't want to make a new one.

The key here is that the "attachment" you refer to is the western understanding of attachment. Yes children need attachment when they are babies and children because that's how they get their needs met.

At the same time buddhism would suggest that they aren't OUR children. Because "me, my, mine" statements lead to suffering. They are people in our lives and we happen to be around them for a short while.

We are all renting our bodies and when our child dies then it gets reborn and starts again. So they are not a fixed permanent being and therefore they can't be ours.

Rather than detachment I like to think of it as letting go. We can't control much of our lives, the future, other people, their karma etc. So we have to accept that we are all in this moment and we have no idea what may happen the next moment.

If that makes any sense!

It can be both. We detach from others, things, sense desires AND aim to produce good karma for ourselves and others through compassion, not attachment.

Yes @Cheeseburger85thats my understanding too.

I’ve been a Buddhist for almost a decade now and I still feel like a beginner. it would be nice to get some discussion going on MN.

I am! I don't stick religiously to one "school" of Buddhism because I think all areas have some really great insights.

Firstly, the eightfold path is genius and is a really practical way of managing life's stresses. It clearly lays out a path for less suffering, starting with the fact there is suffering, that it is maintained by attachment, aversion and ignorance, that there is a way out of it and that the eightfold path is the way.

Re: planning ahead - Buddha doesn't advise against living in the future. We need to plan for things that are coming up, problem solve things we can change. That is perfectly in keeping with Buddha's teachings. He doesn't say "always live in the moment, never plan ahead", that would be ludicrous.

What he does say is see things clearly, without delusion (clouded by judgements, assumptions, beliefs, anger etc). You identify what is reality and then work with that, rather than getting caught up in shoulds, woulds, coulds, musts etc. He is also clear that suffering is often because we can't let go of things - for example, anxiety about losing ones job may be a reasonable feeling but Buddha suggests clinging to that job is, in itself, suffering.

I’m a Theravada Buddhist. We should read the texts, and then meditate on those readings. The teachings are not prescriptive. Buddha’s intention was that each of us should question them to find the meaning therein.

I'm so glad this thread is still going. As an update, I read and re-read the Buddhist in Your Mirror and found it so helpful. I've also been chanting Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo and again, that has been somehow transformational too. So many positive things have happened since I started doing it.

I listen to a bhuddist teacher at night . I taught myself to live just in the moment, forgetting yesterday and tomorrow is not here , so only now matters. This is how I live but it does cause issues as I have no memory of what's gone by , it's been and gone and forgotten . Someone will ask me what I did yesterday and I can only remember by looking in my diary . I'm learning to let people go , even my beloved family because they are not mine. Often I feel I'm not quite grounded in the earth energies but that's kinder to me because It's painful to me as they can be negative . Do I make sense? I don't know anyone else who lives life this way . I guess it suits me as I have always found life harsh in this world .

Thank you for this discussion 🙏

@MargoLivebetter that's great to hear. NMRK is a very very powerful mantra, over the years I've heard from people whose lives have been transformed so I'm not surprised.
@Blueglazzier this is not Buddhism.You misunderstand completely the concept of living in the now. Let me give you a simple example.
You hate your job, you spend time wishing you had your old past job which was so much better. This is dwelling on the past. You think about your future dream job. This is dwelling in the future. Both are forms of escape.
You decide to be the best worker possible at your job and every day go to work, ready to do your best. This is living in the now.
I suggest you read "The Buddha in Your Mirror" and take up chanting Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo, it's a healthy path for you.

I used to be Buddhist but I’m converting to Catholicism. The reasons for this are complex. I’m just commenting here to say that the Dalai Lama has recommended that worldwide it is preferable for people to stick with the religion with which they have been brought up or that with which their own culture is most closely aligned. Wise words I believe.

The Dalai Lama is a guest in a Hindu majority country with a big Muslim population, he kind of has to say that to avoid sectarian violence.
Buddhism was always a missionary religion but it's syncretic, unlike Christianity and Islam, so it doesn't destroy indigenous religions and practices.

Besides the Dalai Lama is only the head of Gelugpa sect of Tibetan Buddhism, he doesn't speak for Mahayana Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese much less Theravada Buddhism.

Buddha teaches that it is ‘grasping’ and ‘clinging’ that cause us to suffer. We make ourselves suffer by wanting things (often material) and holding tight to things and people that no longer serve us well in life. And this is true. We should work on being happy with what we have, and this will lead us to contentment. Living in the moment is about moving forward through mindful living and meditation. Everything is transient; life flows like a river. Much is an illusion. We live in a state of interdependence with everything on the earth, so should remember that letting go of those we love can in itself become a source of suffering. Clinging is about trying to hold on to what inevitably ends, such as a life ending in death. For many in the lay community, Buddhism is a pathway rather than a religion, and however we choose to practice is a product of individual choice. If by following the basic tenets we derive comfort and contentment, then that is all to the good. If we decide to undergo courses of study and become more immersed in the classical teachings, that too is all to the good. Each must decide.

Nichiren Buddhism is a cult. More people have left it than have ever stayed in it. It has a very high drop out rate.

Chanting any mantra can alleviate anxiety but not by any means just NNRK. Chanting is good for an endorphin boost that is all.

I got involved for a good number of years and am pleased I saw the light like most have.

I found Buddhism in my teens but then the more I learnt the more sexist I found it.

Soka Gakkai and Nichiren Shoshu have culty aspects but you're free to leave. Fine. Other Nichiren sects like Nichiren Shu and Rissho Kosei Kai are very mainstream.
Mantras are very powerful, NMRK is technically a title not a mantra and there is a whole dense theology around the Lotus Sutra, which explains how it works. I've chanted and seen it's power.
You obviously have a superficial understanding of Buddhism. So if it's not for you move on.

The fact that SGI/Nichiren Buddhism is dying out internationally except for London and very few other places speaks volumes.

All that chanting for supposed victories. Pressure to attend umpteen meetings. Far too time consuming and all in vain. It has been stated on you tube/reddit that there is more cancer in the organisation than outside it. I have seen this. People get too wrapped up in the practice. I have witnessed this with my own eyes. Most who join ultimately leave.

The supposed protection promised does not apply. Rape abusive relationships addictions losing equity losing one's home. You see it all over time.

Many of the Nichiren Buddhism simply lead terrible lives!

It was a nice feeling chanting though by way of an endorphin boost but it changes nothing. I attended for over nine years.

It is all on reddit and you tube like I say. Proceed with caution. Nice idea but does not work.

I won't write any more. People can make up their own minds. My life is much nicer without it.