Autism and first holy communion difficulties.

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Has anyone had experience of their child making their first holy communion, but having extreme sensitivity to textures and tastes. Our priest has given us some unconsecrated communion wafers to practise with but as soon as it started to melt on his tongue, my son started gagging and nearly threw up. I know it will be very difficult now to get him to try again, he has been so excited in preparing for this and it's only a few weeks away. Any ideas on how i can best help him through this?

I don't k is how it works in the Catholic Church but would your priest be able and willing to bless a different kind of bread/wafer just for your son or does it need to be those specific wafers?

In our church (not Catholic), we use different kinds of unleavened crackers (usually bought from the supermarket) and then have gluten free options etc.

It might be worth asking the priest if he'd be willing to do that and then see if you can find something your son can tolerate.

Yes, DD (ASD and non verbal) did her first communion last year and we were absolutely convinced she wouldn't eat it. The priest was super blasé about it and just handed it to her and moved on. She ended up nibbling it after seeing her colleagues from school do it, but the priest later said it was a non-issue either way.

I have prepared many children with ASD and other ND for FHC.

There are really only 3 options for Holy communion (to the pp above, no we can't use any alternative breads, it has to be just wheat flour and water, no other ingredients):

1. Host only
2. Chalice only
3. Host dipped in chalice (called intinction). This requires communion on the tongue, not in the hand.

The 4th option is both host and chalice separately, but that doesn't help if there are sensory issues with either.

If you think there's one of those your son would take to more easily, speak to your priest about it.

Some parishes have used covid as an excuse to get rid of the chalice, but it has been allowed for well over a year now so your priest shouldn't refuse this even if it's not regularly offered. Know your rights under canon law!

Practise at home as much as you can. At the end of the day, though, if he really won't take it then try not to stress over it. He can make a spiritual communion for now and maybe be ready in a little while.

Also, if the whole host is too much, would he be willing to eat a quarter of one? That's also possible as long as you arrange it in advance with the priest.

Will the priest agree to giving just a small piece of the wafer? That would be easier?

Ooh I was this child! A long old time ago though!

my first holy communion I do no remeber much about it but I also have autism and sensory issues

i did have a lovely priest though and i was allowed to wear trackie bottoms under my communion dress and it was agreed I would no take the chalice and that the priest would no put the communion wafer in my mouth but if I did hold out both hands he would put it in there and it was then up to me or no if I take it or not

this was all agreed in advance and actually where I did have the choice I did actually put the wafer in my mouth every time I did take communion for a couple of years after. But it was my choice 👍

hopefully you have a nice priest as well who can make adjustments like my one did 🤞

Our priest is quite old school, but is also fairly approachable. He was more than happy to accommodate in giving us a few unconsecrated hosts for him to practise at home. The children will not be offered the chalice, i know my son wouldn't take it anyway he only drinks water or apple juice. I have managed to talk him around to trying tomorrow (today will be too much) with just a small piece of the host and hopefully we can just keep going with it. If by the end of the week he's still really struggling i will have a chat with the catechists, and arrange to speak to our priest also.

Thank you for your advice

I remember, as a child, more than once having communion with bread our parish priest had baked. But he was a bit of a rebel.

As long as he only used flour and water it was still valid. It doesn't have to be baked by nuns or anything just guaranteed to have no added ingredients.

Could he just receive the Precious Blood?

They almost certainly wouldn't consecrate anything else. The rules are very strict, I believe.

I have literally no idea about anything religious, so might be no help at all, but these say they're just flour and water - they look like they might be crunchy?

https://www.sainsburys.co.uk/gol-ui/product/rakusens-matzos-crackers-150g?productId=131178&utm_campaign=20333793068&utm_medium=cpc&cmpid=cpc&utm_custom2=759-449-0952&storeId=10151&gclid=Cj0KCQjwjLGyBhCYARIsAPqTz1-nc9XPObQYGpbYcGwI1BWz0v-QfeRHlQZkDTIAvEuQ0z2F3Q66snwaArbsEALw_wcB&catalogId=10241&utm_custom1=&langId=44&utm_source=Google&utm_content=shopping&krypto=UUS%2Bo0LRyiSHBG81zRE8e0ZzEuymnregSMlamiGq95aBbq85yxdHCgNUMVDxzxeuCbNGGn6CfKyNKd0L1XzQbKzlbK0WRk5yc2GcahYXEStV%2FoSp4UUrnIvMkOf%2BtBG4cGos86o6QbBxxxZo6vkkeQ3KMqj0nyikztY7Wco5wsS4RCwbMXcU7cvOjVnV1ENo1k%2FmPTpejEv8MYUkmpkfJkpwVkYgEhsoDxlmkxxBlfk%2FwQJ2WkI1ugM%2BLWSpEADRUMUgDvoP9DWcZR96DeN1QaKVFIh6R%2BDWJzaw44522VuQ%2FfH1NDb4NgDPuVoZMTJ9G3miekAO7iY1%2BP6%2FhAKeqgPwJMUm6zVsB1srztNrwUw%3D&ddkey=https%3Agb%2Fgroceries%2Frakusens-matzos-crackers-150g

I have no advice but just wanted to say that my 16 year old with ASD was baptised last year with a few adjustments. Something we never thought he would be able to do. I hope you manage to help your ds to make his first holy communion.

That would not be the case in many catholic settings. I've seen priests call communicants back if they've walked off with the wafer. Apparently some people will sell them to satanists...?!

On Sundays, we have people to monitor the communion line and make sure that everyone who receives consumes. It's not only Satanists: some people make videos of themselves desecrating the host just to make fun of it; we've had one person in the parish try to share it with her dog (not for desecration purposes, she genuinely thought it was appropriate); sometimes people throw the host into the grating on the floor, or just pocket it - no idea why.

However, if we had prepared someone we knew to have ASD and their parents were hovering to help out, we would usually trust the parents to monitor it appropriately and happily give communion and move on.

That's disturbing.

Fortunately, our (very old and very kind) priest seemed to trust our disabled 12 year old daughter.

It's usually people who don't have a clue what to do with the host, who tend to walk off with it. I've had people try to take them to out on their mother's graves.

Actually, the poster who linked to matzah (which are not valid matter for Roman Catholic communion) did make me think about eastern rites. It depends on what particular textures and tastes your son doesn't tolerate, but communion in many of the eastern Catholic churches is very different (leavened bread - which is more like normal bread than the Latin Rite wafers - , which is soaked in the Precious Blood and dropped into your mouth on a small spoon - which doesn't touch you). If you have an eastern rite Catholic church near you, you could enquire about making first communion there. They don't do first communion as a big separate thing, because children receive communion from baptism, but as a Latin Rite Catholic you (and your son) are perfectly able to receive communion there as well as in a Latin parish. It may well not be suitable, not least because of the unfamiliarity of the surroundings and liturgy, but just a thought in case it might help.