Memento Mori (Title edited by MNHQ @ request of OP)

[Kdtym10]

Meditating on your own death is a very powerful practice, it was something practiced throughout Europe and Scandinavia for centuries, if not millennia. (I understand some Eastern philosophies also have this practice - but they’re not my bag).

In the modern world we are ever increasingly push towards the concept of an ideal of eternal youth, death is seen as something to be avoided in thought and conversation.

Yet contemplating death, both your eventual physical death and the little deaths/endings that happen along the way has historically been seen as so important for life.

I find it incredibly empowering- I just wondered whether many people practice this?

Yes.

You cannot have life without death or death without life. To ignore this, to me, takes away from life itself.

I do, but I do have stage 4 cancer so it makes it all a bit more definite and imminent.

Not recommended for anybody who has struggled with suicidal ideation.

That is a tough one.

This is what I believe 🙏🏻

I was a palliative care nurse for 30 years so I have encountered a lot of death. My husband passed away when I was in my 20s and my dad when I was age 4. Death has always been a harsh reality in my life. I never forget that it's ever present.

Yes.
You cannot have life without death or death without life. To ignore this, to me, takes away from life itself.

I agree. It's 'memento mori' btw.

I'm so sorry you are facing this.

Thank you. It's tough but not all bad. We are all going to die and keeping that in the forefront of your mind helps you to live properly.

It's Memento Mori, not "momento mori".
A reminder that everyone and everything must die, before it reappears again (albeit in a different form). All is Life, even death is part of the cycle. I have a book by Steiner, where he gives some exercises for contemplation/meditation on the subject.

Yes it is - I had a terrible fight with predictive text to get that far lol

Yep - predictive text was also quite insistent it was Moro but hey ho!

I like Steiner

Sorry to hear this. I hope you are coping as well as can be expected and extend light to you

I do.

In part as a part of attempting to live more stoically. In part because I spent decades with S. ideation, followed by episodes of S. compulsion (thank you for that bit of extra programming peri-menopause).

So by considering death deliberately (and within the context of not wasting my limited time on earth) it wards off the sensation that thinking about death is a bad thing that happens TO me.

Not any more. I do it for me. It does not do it to me.
It’s kind of hard to explain, but it helps.

Memento mori- I thought this was when the Victorians took photographs of their dead loved ones to preserve their souls? Have I got that completely wrong?

My STBXH has started banging on about this and carrying a coin around with him.

He’s not enlightened or spiritual or anything. He’s just a pretentious wanker. I give it 6 months tops til he’s forgotten all about it.

Would you consider doing it?

Yea I absolutely get this. I also widen the application snd apply it to the little deaths we constantly face throughout life.

I think it makes you live deliberately.

eg we are moving to a completely different area of the country, it has focused my mind to do all the things round here I keep meaning to do.

I think it’s really important to consider what death means to you, thank you for sharing.

Yes, this is important- I should have added this - thank you.

Absolutely. How do you do this, are there any guided meditations you use?

Lately I’ve been thinking that I need to start embracing death as part of life - to accept my parents’ mortality but also my own.

Easier said that done, maybe.

My FIL is terminally ill at 86 and in denial. I think that’s sad (and also quite surprising, knowing his personality). We all need to be more accepting of death.

I think we are surrounded by pushback against death despite its inevitability
I often pay attention to readings that would be good at a funeral.

There are some beautiful passages in a CofE funeral and in evensong that I find moving and consoling. I walk through my local graveyard and see people there.

I very much face the inevitability of it all. And am not at all afraid of it.

I had a dream which was like a vision of heaven at the end - waiting for heaven really.

I found myself on a train with open topped carriage. As I was travelling dead bodies kept springing up from the tracks. I was smashing them down with a spade and thinking this is horrible but needs must. Then I was in a fortress decorated inside like a hotel. It was in a lovely location with views of the sea. I felt so relieved and so safe. I knew I was safe and didn't have to worry about anything ever again. I was waiting / getting myself ready for a big dinner party. All my relatives and friends would be there but I would see them later. Then I was excitedly dancing in the room. (Maybe with one of my friends maybe alone - memory patchy there)

In the morning my mother said she had the same dream except she was weeping at the dead bodies for the families of the people. Except she still got to the fortress and then was dancing with her deceased sister.

You could look at the meditations on death by Marcus Aurelius.

This article also has some useful stuff.

And you can also look at Buddhist Maranasati Meditation..

Thanks for sharing those resources, I will take a look.

I once had an amazing regression session when I experienced my own (past) death. The guider was really good at getting me to talk about things round it. It was really useful in my exploration.

I also had an altered state of consciousness (not drug/medicine induced) where I experienced what happened after death that was also useful,

I was with my father when he died, and I guided him through it. It was a beautiful final thing we shared. It made me think a lot about how we view death.

there’s so much that we can learn about ourselves meditating on our death and impermanence, I wish it were more common, I’m sure it would improve peoples experience of living.