Any experience of religion causing a mother to disown her children?

[lem31]

My partner (m38) has always been close with his mum and Stepdad until recently. Things have been strained since his father died 18 months ago (his mum and dad were divorced and had a very strained relationship, although the grown children maintained contract and relationships with both). He died of covid at the start of the pandemic and my partner also lost his job and home at the start of the pandemic so moved back with his mum and started working on her business. Since then, nothing is good enough. On her request he left the family business (she said he should be doing better already so he got a new job) then she expected him to still work for her whenever she needed him to. He helped where he could but clearly this couldn't be the same extent due to him getting the new ft job.
Things just got worse and worse over the year. She's never wanted anything to do with me which had caused some friction for my partner, although we had reached out many times.
Her behaviour has become more and more difficult. She announced that she has written all her children out her will. She has started bringing things up from the past that happened (like 10 years ago) as an excuse for long her children they are not doing well enough. Even saying that my partner was a difficult baby and so he owes her a debt of gratitude.
Any time they try to put their pov forward they are told that they are being disrespectful and get bible passages quoted at them.
Recently my partner tried to resolve the issue and instead of wanting to talk it through, his mum and sf told him they were done with him and that he was being given notice to move out of their house (he is renting a room in one of their other houses).
We know she has given a lot of money to her church and seems to be becoming more and more fanatical about it, giving a lot of her income to the church (and I think writing her church into her will instead of her children).
We are trying to make sense of her behaviour change. We are wondering if her church may be separating her from her children for money (I mean this particular church - I know there are many amazing churches out there but there feels something not right with the amount of money she is giving them... )
I guess I was just wondering if anyone had a similar experience. Its possible that the sf is controlling and behind this, but we are just searching for answers and to try to resolve this ASAP. She has basically told all her children to move away and she is going into the new year distancing herself from them. It feels like she is being manipulated somewhere....

Is she having any cognitive issues? It seems a lot more going on then just issues with the church. I would look at the relationship between your partner and his mum first - it sounds as though that is the issue. Does it stem from bereavement?

Do you know which church it is? Can you contact the minister to say that you are worried about mum? All churches are strapped for cash but unless this is an independent church run out of someone's front room it is unlikely they are actively milking her for cash. As a general rule evangelical churches ask for 10% of someone's net income. Is it more than that?

It does sound worrying that there is such a dramatic change in behaviour and that she is pushing her children away. This might be something a minister could help with mediation but they need to know it is happening.

Well if she is using Bible quotes then the religion is Christianity but this will be the interpretation of a single pastor not a wider denomination.
Within Protestantism one can interpret the Bible in your own way, which is why there are thousands of sub groups yet none really in Catholicism.
The evangelical and Pentecostal traditions are generally fanatical about using the Bible in the way you describe and the focus is very much on sin and being saved - hence the names.
It sounds like they are caught up in a specific church, led by a radicalist; sadly more common than one might think.

What really hit home for me, was the fact he owes her because he was a difficult baby. That's an awful thing to say. And quite sad really.

To be honest I would keep her and her partner, the stepdad at an arms length and keep contact to minimal. Seems there is a lot more going on then the possibility of a church warping their minds.

@Meadowblossom

Is she having any cognitive issues? It seems a lot more going on then just issues with the church. I would look at the relationship between your partner and his mum first - it sounds as though that is the issue. Does it stem from bereavement?

Honestly hard to know. We have been wondering for a while and were going to speak to her husband about it but now that seems like it won't help. It's really sad and worrying.

@balloonsintrees

Well if she is using Bible quotes then the religion is Christianity but this will be the interpretation of a single pastor not a wider denomination. Within Protestantism one can interpret the Bible in your own way, which is why there are thousands of sub groups yet none really in Catholicism. The evangelical and Pentecostal traditions are generally fanatical about using the Bible in the way you describe and the focus is very much on sin and being saved - hence the names. It sounds like they are caught up in a specific church, led by a radicalist; sadly more common than one might think.

Yes, this is our concern. We don't know how much she gives away to them but she seems to always be donating to them for one cause or another. Definitely a wayward pastor rather than any reflection on wider christianity if it is them. It makes it hard to get in touch with the pastor as they won't help if it is them! I think we are just searching for answers to try and build the bridges really. But I'm not sure how we can at this point :(

@PopsicleHustler

What really hit home for me, was the fact he owes her because he was a difficult baby. That's an awful thing to say. And quite sad really.

To be honest I would keep her and her partner, the stepdad at an arms length and keep contact to minimal. Seems there is a lot more going on then the possibility of a church warping their minds.

Yeah, you are probably right. Some other things have gone on now with his sister which is making it harder and harder to see how this can be resolved. I hate this because family is so important to me and cant imagine what this must be like to go through for them all. I hope that there is a way back for it to be resolved....just searching for answers atm.

Not my mother, but my sister won't have any meaningful relationship with anyone outside of her religion. ( Evangeical Baptist). She and her family only socialise with people within her church, her children only hadfriends within the church, and attended a school run by the church, where the main emphasis seems to be scripture studies. She has had no communication with me for 5 years.
Religion makes good people do bad things.

Which church group is it? Which one makes a huge difference in how a person might behave ime.