What do I say....sad situation

[BumblePan]

I dont know where to post this. Please move if it doesn't belong in this section.
A college friend is living through their last year on earth. I am so sad as I really thought they had a fighting chance.
They are spending precious time with family, so I will not see them again. I am so upset and saddened that my beautiful friend doesn't have much time left. I would like to send him a letter or something to say how special they are.
I've been sitting here for the last hour and I cannot gather my thoughts and write something thoughful.
Please help fellow mumsneters! What do I say?
Or do you think that its even a good idea.

I’d definitely write the letter but you have to send it with no expectations. Your friend might not be up to reading it or responding to it.

It can be quite overwhelming for people facing their mortality and they might not have the emotional energy to take on your feelings too. It can also be viewed as selfish, like adding to their burden but I appreciate that’s not the intention.

@FlorenceNightshade thanks for your reply.
Its not my intention to mention anything about my sadness or feelings.
I remember reading an article about a family who felt overwhelmed with visitors during the final days and Its something that has stayed in my mind. At least there wont be any visitors with covid.
I am still undecided about sending a letter. I guess I just want them to know that they are loved!

You’re allowed to have feelings and share them if you do so in a way that respects that your feelings of loss etc are not in comparison to theirs.

You can acknowledge the good times/memories and express sadness that you won’t get to make more. You can tell your friend how much they mean to you and how you’ll honour them in your life without them.

It’s difficult but in this situation I’d think about what would bring comfort/joy to me if I were dying and express that. There’s no right or wrong way to feel and I’m sure your friend would rather have a letter that they choose not to read than have nothing.

I’m recently bereaved and while I physically couldn’t respond to every text, message etc I appreciated them all. Silence would have been upsetting in a different way. But that’s my experience and I appreciate that everyone is different

Absolutely write, tell him how special and loved he is and why.

I would be wary about writing an emotional letter.

As much as it may unburden you OP it may be very upsetting for your friend.
There are lots of ways of expressing love in other ways.
By all means drop a card or a note, share a meme or a few words, but I would steer away from the heavy- you don'yy know how it will land.
Visits, small gifts , a phone call, just keeping in touch will mean loads.