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Alpha course & The Holy Spirit

38 replies

TheFunkyFox · 17/03/2019 07:47

So just after Xmas I decided to join an Alpha course. I had been going to play groups at the local church weekly and was kind of cornered while there and asked if I would like to join the next group. I thought meh, why not! I will ask all the questions I wanted answering, why the suffering etc if there was a god. I didn’t believe at all, even though I wanted too my brain told me to stop being stupid.

Fast forward a lot of weeks, each week Iv been abit more “well if there is a god, then why doesn’t he send a sign?!”. Everyone on the course and at church seemed so happy, and I wanted that!

Last week I was reading the bible for the first time, trying to get some research in ;), when my son came down stairs. He had borrowed an action bible from the church and had been reading it. He was telling me what he had learnt and he said

“If you ask your father for bread, does he give you a stone”.

When he went back upstairs I got back to the bible and on the first line on the next page was the exact quote!!!

Yesterday was the alpha away day. It was all about the Holy Spirit which I had never even really heard of 🙈.

At the end they asked if they could come round and prey for you and I said yes.

I sat down and the put their hands on me and preyed.

And I started to sob uncontrollably. I can’t explain what happend. I felt like I was being hugged and told how much I was loved. I haven’t had that in 10 years since my mum died.

I couldn’t stop crying, but I didn’t know why.

Has anyone had this?! I feel so different. I can’t explain it but wtf!

OP posts:
CaptainMarvelBunting · 17/03/2019 20:06

Ok, well, Alpha and Charismatic stuff is not my bag, but I am entirely supportive of people finding peace and comfort in ways that touch the spiritual senses - which some of us have and some of us don't.

You have clearly got an interest in exploring and questioning that, and I don't think you're saying you just want affirming agreement, just that you don't really need the sneering, jeering sort of posts that some seem to feel compelled to post whenever someone shares a religious or spiritual experience.

Tbh, considering you mentioned that you gained a sense of peace and comfort connected to some real sadness, I'm quite surprised anyone feels the need to lead in with the usual unpleasantness, but there we go, takes all sorts.

Everyone is different. Some of us spend our entire lives in one way, and then something unexpected wakes up a part of us we didn't know we had. Various people call this different things - psychology, the Holy Spirit, emotions, it doesn't make that much difference. If something brought you peace, cherish that, because so little does in this world, and don't let others scorn you for it.

I'm sure you are an intelligent woman and so you'll know that you don't ever stop asking questions - If you ever feel you can't, or are told you need to stop, then you'll know you're not in the right place anymore.

But peace and emotional comfort? I think that is generally a good thing.

Meadowland · 17/03/2019 20:14

@CaptainMarvelBunting. Lovely thoughtful post. Totally agree.

SnowdropsiUnderTrees · 17/03/2019 22:16

OP I had similar when I DD an Alpha course many years ago. For some reason I quietly cried almost every week. I think it was an overwhelming feeling of things being right. It as actually very embarrassing but I couldn't help it, neither did I want to stop the course.
When years later I actually started going to church regularly I would cry during the songs. It was again just an overwhelming feeling of something being right. It actually took me about 12 months to stop crying during the songs! I would just take a few tissues for my eyes every week! There was no reason for me to cry, I wasn't having any problems or anything I just felt a bit overwhelmed.
I honestly wouldn't worry about it. Just go with it.

mostlydrinkstea · 18/03/2019 07:25

I recognise the experience and the emotion. It happened to me at university and pretty much out of the blue except that I was arguing with the God I didn't believe in at the time. There was this overwhelming sense of love. I cried a lot. I also hadn't heard of the Holy Spirt.

What I did was found out more. I went to lots of different types of churches and listened to different speakers. I joined various student Bible study groups. As a student of philosophy I asked lots of really hard questions which slightly freaked out some group leaders.

That was 40 years ago and I still cry at some of the songs and get caught out by the love of God in Jesus. There is a chat thread and prayer thread on this board if you want to come and say hi.

TheFunkyFox · 18/03/2019 09:55

Thank you all! I just can’t deny it anymore. I didn’t believe anything these people said about feeling it at first and thought it was nonsense because I had never felt it! It’s completely changed me, I feel at peace and just happy.

Yes I will come over to that group! X

OP posts:
JITSOG · 21/03/2019 10:45

Congratulations OP. You had a comforting hug from the Holy Spirit.

I wish you well in your Christian journey. May God’s peace be a blessing to you always Smile

yasminesarahx · 21/03/2019 22:00

Hey! I have done the Alpha course and I had very similar experiences and realised it is the Holy Spirit Smile I wasn’t brought up in a Christian background atall, in fact I was the LAST person you would expect to accept Jesus as our Saviour. There was just too many signs and every time I tried to pull away, I would always find myself coming back to him. At times I have found it hard to accept, tried to disprove it etc but now I am so happy that I came to Jesus and couldn’t imagine my life without him x

Madhairday · 28/03/2019 12:54

Hello @TheFunkyFox and thank you for describing your experience. It sounds beautiful. I know you'll get a lot of cynicism, or explaining it away as being due to sharing with others etc, and I get that, but in my experience it is an experience of the God who loves you. The Holy Spirit isn't something to be afraid of, Jesus described the spirit as a comforter. It's like the assurance, the physical presence of God. I've had a lot of experiences like you describe - sometimes in crowds, sometimes alone, and always life-changing and transformative. If you'd like to come and join the prayer or chat thread, you'd be so welcome - or if you want to pm about it, then please do. I'm not looking to prey on anyone or introduce anyone to some kind of dodgy cult - I'm just interested in sharing the profound love of God.

How are you today op?

SugarfreeMe · 29/03/2019 02:47

@TheFunkyFox I'm a Christian who is so glad to hear that you have found out how much you are loved and that when you experienced the Holy Spirit he helped you to deal with the loss of your Mum.
I really hope that the church you have been going to will have a group you can be part of that will help you navigate these early days, if you find this church isn't please look at others. I know that it's been insinuated they are trying to prey on you, however that truly isn't the case, people are interested in you developing a relationship with God.
I'm not around here lots but please feel free to message me if you want to talk, or have questions.
I'm incredibly excited to see your blossoming relationship.

ZenNudist · 29/03/2019 23:36

Like this thread. I am intrigued by your story OP and love to hear similar stories.

I have recently became religious and cant stop talking about it with all and sundry, but still feel vaguely embarrassed.

I have thrown away all my bad faith issues. I find it easy to accept the holy spirit. It hits you like a thunderbolt when you realise its happened to you. I know what you mean, wtf indeed!

Signs could just be dismissed as coincidences (they sure seem very weird, like how could that happen just then?!). However I have also been as overwhelmed as you mention being but in my case through Catholic mass, hymns and various sacraments.

I'd swear it was mental illness but im honestly level headed and it all came out of the blue. You'd never be able to convince an atheist that.

I think some people are guarded about their lack of faith and want everyone to think the same way.

Im finding it strange to weld together old me with new me, keep slipping back, have a core of rightness and understanding but such a thirst for finding out more.

PianoVigilante · 01/04/2019 23:32

I used to cry regularly during pregnancy yoga at the moment where the teacher covered up each of us in a blanket for the relaxation bit. It was the kindness of the gesture, not some engagement with Hindu philosophy.

IdaBWells · 03/05/2019 07:59

TheFunkyFox hello, how is your walk with God going, or however you would like to describe it? I had a similar encounter with the Holy Spirit when I was 17. I was very hardened, cynical and a confirmed atheist (or so I thought). I was baptized two years later at 19, I entered the Catholic church at that time. I am still a Catholic and am now 50. My faith is still the center of my life. My mum died when I was 13 and like you, when I had this encounter with the divine it was my first deep experience of love since my mum had died.

In my case though noone prayed over me, I was in a Christian context, the Shrine of Our Lady at Walsingham. It was in broad daylight in the middle of a field, noone was near me or talking to me, although they were milling around nearby but not paying any attention to me.

I have been asked to be involved with Alpha at my parish and just attended a training day. I would be really interested to know how things are going.

Italiangreyhound · 14/05/2019 22:09

TheFunkyFox the day I became a Christian (over 36 years ago) I really cried, it was very powerful and moving.

I've done the Alpha as a helper, cooking and washing up etc.

Sometimes God does just really touch us and speak to situations we are in/going through.

Enjoy the things you enjoy, ask the questions you want to ask, make friends etc. And I am so glad you have peace around the loss of your mum. My mum died three years ago and having peace about such a significant loss is very good.

Bless you. Thanks

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