Want to go back to Church, will I be welcome?

[Lunacake]

Hi everyone. This may be a long post so please bare with....

I was raised Roman Catholic, always belived in God and love Jesus. Absolutely loved going to church and looked forward to it. I’ve been baptised and have had my holy communion.

When I became a teenager I lost interest. I did however, keep my faith. I always felt a pull back to God, but went off the rails a bit.

I haven’t been to church in years. However, for a while now I have still had this little pull to go back. I’m not sure if I would feel welcome, since I haven’t been in years? I also feel slightly anxious about going on my own...

There are two Catholic Churches in my area, and one Anglican Church. Would I need to go to confession if I go to the Catholic Church? The Anglican Church seems to be more popular, if I’m Catholic would this be an issue?

Thank you 🙂

I’ve felt comfortable at Catholic Churches when I attend weddings though I’m a Anglican. When there was communion I went up for a blessing. I think technically if you receive communion at RC church you should do confession beforehand but I don’t know if priests check. In any case I’m sure lots of people attend the service but don’t necessarily have communion and I’m sure they’d love to have you there.

Anglican Churches I’ve attended would be happy to have you. They vary quite a lot in their style and outlook. Some are traditional with hymns, organ etc. Others are modern with projectors, guitars, drums. Styles of preaching vary too from reflective to more bible-study type.

Blessings and prayers. I hope you’ll be able to find a community who help you deepen your relationship with God.

PS - I’d encourage you to try a few different places to see different styles and different people.

OP another lapsed RC here. I was born and raised Roman Catholic and my mum is still very devout. Like you, I sometimes feel a tug to go back and have thought about it. I can't see why any RC church wouldn't welcome you back with open arms and I understand that Confession is very outmoded now. You could just turn up for mass and introduce yourself slowly to people if you want. With dwindling congregations they need all the people they can get!

Ps going to an Anglican church is not an issue. I have a beautiful C of E cathedral at the end of my road which I've attended on and off over the years and also taken Communion there. God isn't going to judge you, all that nonsense was created by men in high places. Do what makes you feel comfortable and fulfilled.

I was lapsed Catholic and now I'm Anglican - made to feel very welcome. But like PPs have said - try more than one and see what fits.

My suggestion would be to come along to Mass for a bit. You would need to refrain from receiving communion until you've been to Reconciliation/confession, but you could still go up in the communion line and receive a blessing (in my church we indicate that we just want a blessing by holding our arm across our chest).

Be aware that in many RC churches the Mass is not really the best place to make friends - it's not like other Christian denominations services which are often designed as outreach. But you will encounter God there, which is the point. Making friends is probably more likely in one of the various groups the church may run.

Speak to the priest, and if there's a bulletin available at Mass, there will probably be details of what's going on. You could also phone the church and make an appointment with the priest and have a chat about where you are, and most priests I know would be delighted to welcome you.

I'll pray for you xx

I am also Catholic and I’m sure you would be very welcome. You can always come to Mass at any time. As FloralBunting says if you have been away for a while you may want to just get back into the swing of things and when you feel ready to receive communion go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation first. This may feel daunting when you haven’t been for a while but you will receive grace and usually experience great peace afterwards.

Just google “Examination of Conscience” and you can use this reflectively to think about what you would like to say during the Sacrament of Reconciliation. Once you have been back you can go to Communion but you don’t need to go to the Sacrament of Reconciliation every time you want to go to Communion.

It you have any concerns I would encourage you to chat to a local priest or parish member who reaches out to returning Catholics (just call the parish and ask).

Non Catholics don’t have as many sacraments and may play down the need for Reconciliation but that would be the most straightforward way of returning to the church. You can explain to the priest how long you have been away and I’m sure he will be delighted to welcome you home.

I am a very happy Catholic and like Floralbunting will pray for you. Don’t stay away when you know you are being called back as you will experience great joy, Catholics usually love to welcome back a sister in Christ xxx

Hi OP, I grew up in the Church of Scotland and became a Catholic when I was 21. You will certainly be welcome in a Catholic Church! I found Roderick Strange's book 'The Catholic's Faith' very very helpful when I converted.

Priests don't 'check' if you've gone to reconciliation, it's down to your personal conscience whether you're in a state of grace to receive the Eucharist. I know some priests who don't mind you taking communion so long as it is a commitment you have returned and will go to reconciliation and attend Mass regularly.

There will be people who attend Mass and only go for a blessing (you join the queue but cross your hands over your chest to show you are not taking the Eucharist) so you don't need to feel out of place.

Do you know if you received the sacrament of Confirmation after receiving First Holy Communion? Being Confirmed makes you a full adult member of the Catholic Church (other Christian churches have their own confirmation which is not usually a sacrament). If not, your Priest can tell you a bit about having adult confirmation sessions that would help you explore if you want to go back (and it helps you do your reconciliation/confession beforehand.

Do remember that Roman Catholics believe in transubstantiation, which can be difficult to approach at first. Other churches don't do that may help you decide where you want to attend.

My church has tea and coffee after Mass and can be a great place to meet people - I also joined the catechism team to help my faith grow which helps with youth activities and sacramental prep across our parish - I do children's liturgy and confirmation classes and it's wonderful! There are loads of ways to be involved - choirs, readers, tea-makers etc!

Good luck and god bless, whatever you choose!

Hi, OP. I was raised Catholic too, but I'm not a believer now. Anyway, my family are still very much believers, work in the church etc so I keep up to date on many things RC. The church is always open and welcoming to people who want to return. In the run up to the main feasts you'll find it even moreso. In our local diocese they recently had a sort of campaign/motto that said something like "Come Home for Christmas" where lapsed Catholics were welcomed to go to mass/confession in the run up to Christmas (obviously).

Mass attendance is reducing over the years, rest assured you won't be turned away.

As others have said, you are very welcome to come back to the RC, but don't expect a welcoming committee, most people probably won't notice you're new or won't say anything if they do notice, especially if you're in a busier area like a city. If you want anyone to talk to about the faith, you'll probably have to do the running to start with. If you just want to come along and sit quietly at Mass, undisturbed, you'll be right at home!

There are courses called RCIA, which stands for the Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults. Most parishes run them starting in the late summer or autumn through to May/June. They are specifically designed for people who want to become Catholic, but we also have a lot of participants who are adults who were baptised as children but never confirmed so they come for Confirmation preparation. And every year, in my parish, we'll have one or two in your situation who have been away from the Church for a while and want to know more about what it's all about. That would be a really good way to find out what the Church's teachings are, in case you've forgotten or only ever had a child's level of knowledge, as well as to meet people.

There are usually lots of other ways to meet people too, but they'll depend on your interests and time. The majority of Catholics just come on a Sunday for Mass and that's it, but there's plenty more going on for people who want it.

And don't worry about coming on your own. There's lots of people in different situations who come in all sorts of size groups. Probably more people come alone than anything else. Plus it's easier that way to try it out and then try out another church without any pressure!

I agree with Fink and Trinnidad that you may feel if you have not been confirmed that you would like to go through RCIA to learn the fullness of the faith and understand what you are assenting to as adult Christian. It’s also a great way to make friends with people within the parish who are learning more about their faith.

Regarding the Sacrament of Reconciliation as well as drawing closer to God, the Sacrament is about Reconciliation to the community and the visible church. We can always ask Jesus at anytime for forgiveness but the Sacrament is really to help us in our humanness hear the words of another person “in persona Christi” (in the place of Christ) welcome us home. It is just the equivalent of us being away from our family for a long time, coming back and saying “this is why I’ve been away” and be brought back into the body of believers and a community of love.

agreed - thats one of the reasons why, even though i still use term ´confession` colloquially, when im explaining things, I will try and use Sacrament of Reconciliation because that puts the emphasis on a welcoming relationship better.

Lots of people in our church, including myself, go alone, but I feel very much part of a loving community, and have lots of good friends there.
Agree with the poster who said others may not approach you, to respect your privacy, but if you introduce yourself, you should find a very warm welcome.

I just showed up again and continued on as before.

Op, I could have written that post.
Parents especially DM are devout Catholics. I stopped going to mass when I was about 14 (apart from weddings etc.)
I started going back to mass when I was in my 20s after I had DD.
I have had many problems in my life, mostly self induced, but my faith is a real source of comfort to me. I pray every day, always have rosary beads tucked away in my handbag and various prayer cards in my purse. I particularly like the prayer to St Joseph.
As others have said, have a chat with your local priest. Or just go to mass first and take it from there.
I'll say a prayer for you for guidance x

The Anglican church would certainly welcome you if you feel more comfortable there. There would be no issue with you coming there from catholicism - the whole point of the Anglican church was to be broad enough that it doesn't matter what specific items of faith people believe or don't believe. (Queen Elizabeth I. Trying very hard to come up with a plan to stop catholics and protestants burning eachother. Came up with the idea that people could believe whatever they like and worship side by side without being in full agreement on all items of theology). There's a huge spread of styles of worship within Anglicanism though. Some churches are practically RC and some are very much the other end od the scale. I've been to an Anglican church which included incense, bells, Hail Mary prayer and prayers for the Pope within the service - and also ones where the whole service was singing evangelical songs accompanied with guitar and drums, minister in jeans and and a hoody, and all liturgical prayers turned into a rock song so that they wouldn't interrupt the vibe.

Any Catholic is welcome to take communion in an Anglican church.
OP, Jesus said there is more joy in heaven over one sinner who repents than 99 who didn’t need to. You should be welcomed back into any Christian church, regardless of how long you have been away or whatever you may have done or failed to do in the interim!
God doesn’t keep an attendance register- His door is always open and He waits with open arms to greet us, His beloved children.
Remember that He is love incarnate - you will never be rejected.
If you are more worried about your reception by the other worshippers, I’d recommend trying out a few local churches to assess the clientele and reaction to newcomers. Some churches are more welcoming and inclusive than others, some have a mainly elderly congregation, some have lots of young families. Some are traditional, some are “happy clappy”.
My prayers that you find the right church for you, and reconnect with the God who loves you.