How do I become more spiritual?

[Thistle72]

I’m a cancer nurse and have been for 25 years. In the last 2 years I have struggled emotionally with my work. I am trying to eat better, walk my dog in the open space, love my dearest relatives more but feel I need more spiritual support.
How do I do that? I tried Buddhism and felt it related a lot to my work but some of the people I met there unnerved me so I didn’t go back.

Any idea’s

Our local Unitarian church runs a series of talks on spirituality, with speakers from many different disciplines, most recent was Tao . If you have one locally they might be a good place to start

Yes, I knew churches charged. I never go.

Any chance you might have some stress trauma from your job? You could start with meditation and visualisation.

This one certainly doesn't charge. Spend your money on what you find worthwhile.

It’s complete nonsense to say churches charge money! There is a totally voluntary collection plate - you can put in a donation if you want, or ignore it if not. Many of my own regular fellow worshippers pay by direct debit, so don’t put cash in the plate either- nobody will look askance at you for not contributing.
However, Christianity is not about self indulgent “spirituality” (whatever that’s supposed to mean) - it’s about actions, not words. And if you came to explore it properly, and established a loving relationship with God, you would naturally want to contribute an affordable sum each week to help those less fortunate than you. The church collection helps to fund outreach services, care homes, missionary work, drug rehab, and major charities such as Christian Aid.
True spirituality, to a Christian, means the joy of being loved by God, and being able to channel His love to other people.
I urge you to go to your local church and give it a try. It’s life changing.

It’s complete nonsense to say churches charge money! It's not nonsense, it's a racket and has been from time immemorial. Have you been the palace that is the Vatican.

I urge you to go to your local church and give it a try. It’s life changing. No thank you, I have no need or want to.

*Christianity is not about self indulgent “spirituality” (whatever that’s supposed to mean) - it’s about actions, not words. Looking down on others spirituality, your way or the highway, I see.

Meditation techniques are good for anyone seeking peace and calmness. I believe they should be used for finding the Truth.
When I ask people about their experiences of meditation they are normally very enthusiastic about it and attend classes regularly. Whether that be TM, Mindfulness, Yoga or any other type I.e. drumming, chanting etc. These techniques give the psychological mind a rest from the stresses of human life. Anything that does this is good. It could also be any activity that gives the mind a rest.

However when they are asked, how quickly do the psychological thoughts come back into the mind, the reply is that they come back very quickly. So the mind has had a rest for a short period. If when asked that they could have that peace and calmness 24/7 they are understandably reluctant.
Because they believe it means letting go of what they know. A belief that they need to let go of control. In Truth it is not so.
There is a higher meditation that can be practiced. This higher meditation is practiced whilst you are walking down the street, driving the car, shopping, cooking, working or doing anything. It is quite simple.
It is being aware of your psychological thoughts and not believing them.
The average human has 50.70,000 thought a day. A high percentage are practical thoughts. I.e. What's for dinner, the bins need putting out, the bed needs changing, the towels need washing so on and so forth. These practical thoughts do not hurt you. They are however thoughts.
Then there are the psychological thoughts. These are the ones that hurt you if you believe in them. They project you into the future and take you back to the past. As soon as you believe them you will either be anxious or depressed.
For example, if you have booked a dental appointment next week. An everyday occurrence, done through practical thought. There will be a moment when the psychological thought comes up. What if I need a filling or two? How much will it cost? and other thoughts as well. These are the ones that are now creating anxiety. Might be only mildly, but it is there. These thoughts might escalate when getting closer to the appointment. But you are believing in them.
The Truth is, that there is absolutely nothing you can do until you sit in the dentists chair and they have examined you and it is only then you can react to what is required. It may be nothing and you have spent a week worrying about it.
I've given one example. Now add all the psychological thoughts you have in a day................
This example shows how our mind projects into the future. When you stay in the now and don't let your thoughts control you. Human existence becomes calmer, peaceful, easier.
When you can see these types of though and choose not to believe in them. You will find that life is much more peaceful and calmer. Yes it can be done 24/7.
Try it.

And when the thought comes. This is to hard. DON'T BELIEVE IT.

For good reading on this. 'The Power of Now' by Eckarte Tolle.

Thanks for all your replies today. Yes so go think I have suffered from trauma. I like the idea of meditation, I love the sound of that book Power of Now.

Thank you all for your help

I think when you have the desire to become more spiritual, it can often be better to turn inwards for the answers before looking to any external person/group/institution. Meditation/mindfulness is a good tool for that in my experience.

Like you, I didn't feel right with Buddhism as a spiritual path but mindfulness is something I practice. I slip in and out all day without anyone realising (you don't have to sit in a trance like state or chant if that isn't convenient or comfortable) Just slipping into your senses of listening, feeling, touch etc can turn off the inner dialogue. I find using Mudras help to centre me when I want to go deeper.

Being out in nature, especially with animals can shift my own perceptions too....music, art. Anything that can evoke the senses. With the work you do I wonder if you've had to close off /detach a little? I know I became a bit of an emotional robot when I worked in a challenging field simply because I was getting so overwhelmed with other peoples suffering. I had to detach in order to be of use. ( I seem to have gone the other way again but am slowly getting my balance)

Good luck. You deserve it

Thank you. I found all my coping mechanisms that had worked for 23 years didn’t work anymore and it became unpredictable. A tan line on someone’s foot reminded me this was a person who lived a full life until this terrible disease got its grips. I was burnt out, which makes me very sad.
I’m going to try mediation and read more about mindfulness and take it from there. You’ve all opened so much to me. Thank you.

Listen to Matt Khan on YouTube. My current favourite talk
by him is called Karmic Return.

Ohyesiam I've not heard of him before, just having a listen now.

Yoga might be something else to look into? You start with the physical practice which is something most people feel comfortable with, and it can become more spiritual with time if that feels right for you... If this is something you might be interested in I’d recommend finding smaller classes at a yoga centre rather than the exercise class-style ones!

Is highly recommend Chung Fu, run by Deep Soul Connection in Glastonbury.
He does free live calls you can listen into, there’s one happening this Saturday x

I too have looked at becoming more spiritual and I've read some interesting things and recommendations from posters on here. I've concluded that there is a range of spiritual possibilities within the human psyche depending on things like personality, ability to forget rational thought, the depth of need for some 'other', and acceptance of suggestion. Things like meditation and looking inwards works for some people, but I don't believe there is a panacea belief system that works or is right, or that one even exists (except at a basic 'I'm alive until I die' belief system). People and organisations may try to convince you that what they have or espouse is the true way. It doesn't mean you have to have anything they suggest or feel obliged to be more spiritual. Looking for spiritual guidance may be a cry to explain personal trauma but the explanation may just be unfortunate personal trauma - there doesn't have to be a spiritual answer for anything. So of course look around - but finding nothing is ok too.

Hi, Ooh I just found this thread - love it! I would also echo reading any of the Eckhart Tolle books, Ram Dass, Gangaji, Mooji, Krishnamurti there is so much out there. I also recently listened to someone called Dr Shefali Tsabury who I really enjoyed and she advocates meditation, daily, just bringing yourself back to the breath no matter what you are doing, it is just about detaching from the mind. I say just, I don't find it easy at all but it is a work in progress for me! I have tried more 'formal' religions and I really struggle with the 'authority' side of being told how I should believe. It makes me uncomfortable and after a fair amount of psychological pain I have searched elsewhere and found these simple but hugely profound (for me) speakers. They do not 'tell' you how to live, they merely point to the truth. The path is your own to take.

Also, in terms of coping mechanisms failing, when this happened for me this seemed to open up something inside me where I really questioned what I was using to cope or how I was coping, and I couldn't find any definitive answers. Which was, quite frankly, terrifying, but now, a bit further down the road I realise there is something deeper than our coping strategies. Sorry I don't know if any of this makes sense, but I suppose I have found a deeper reserve of peace that I didn't know I had, even though to find it was kind of like a living hell. Which I understand doesn't sound particularly appealing!

@Woollycardi

I suppose I have found a deeper reserve of peace that I didn't know I had, even though to find it was kind of like a living hell

Did you find that making the leap of faith from one to the other frightening? Is that what you are describing?

Hard to describe...but perhaps that everything became intolerable (I suppose I am talking about what was happening inside my head and my view of my life) before I even considered there was another way of being. Does that make sense? I am still on very rocky ground about what I mean about all this.
Have you experienced something similar @noego?

And also perhaps that the leap was terrifying yes, infinitely huge on a level I have never even considered, but also to stay where I was became (becomes...still changing) unbearable.

@Woollycardi

There was a fear of letting go of what was known to the unknown. I now know that the unknown is the immutable.

I have found this with other spiritual seekers that this mind block is there in all of them and only they can let go of the psychological mind and make the leap of faith.

The crossover is not some bolt of lightening, it is simply a moment when everything is let go. Very subtle, just an Ah Ah moment.

All I can say is 'come on in, the water is lovely' :)

@noego
Thank you. My frustration is that I am looking for a point of entry and I can't find one. Or a cliff to jump off of (not a literal one but you know what I mean) and I can't find one. It's like I have read so much and understood so much, and have moments of 'ah ha', but they are so fleeting...gosh it's all my mind, isn't it? We really are so seduced by form.

But your message has given me chills, and I hope to join you in the water soon. I am just paddling around in the shallows it seems.

Thanks for the support, I really wasn't expecting a reply, this has been a bloody lonely journey so far!

@Woollycardi

Just keep following that which resonates and let things be.................................

It will come when you stop seeking. It is only the mind that seeks the answer.

Remember 'what you are looking for, is where you are looking from'.

@noego Thank you. That highly resonates.